Sex With Dr. Jess

Dr. Jessica O'Reilly

In Sex With Dr. Jess, Dr. Jessica O’Reilly, Toronto-based sexologist, author, and media personality, shares tips on how to enhance your sexual life to improve the quality of your relationships. She interviews guests with questions ranging from how to deal with jealousy to getting down in the bedroom, as well as hosting thought-provoking episodes centered around compatibility and strengthening relationships.

All Episodes

This week we discuss therapy and emotional expression with the mental health practitioner and author of Man, Just Express Yourself, James Harris. He shares advice for those who are resistant to therapy, as well as tips for opening up and getting your loved ones to do the same. You can order your copy of "Man, Just Express Yourself" and the Cheesy Date Board Game. You can find James' book and board game on his website. And follow his Instagram and YouTube channels to stay up to date with James. Holidays are coming up, and TSC's Intimately You has holiday prices going on. And you can get an additional 25% off with my code* DRJESS25 - Toys from Lelo, We-Vibe, Romp, and so much more. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media.

Dec 3

35 min 5 sec

Want to give a hotter hand job? Check out our quick tips, and then join us as we switch gears and have a candid discussion with a Hotwife couple, John & Tiffany. They talk about their story -- from high school sweethearts to the parents of two teens — to a very happy couple in the Hotwife lifestyle. They share how they got started and explain why they find Hotwifing so fulfilling — and why you might too! To stay up to date with Tiffany and John's hotwife lifestyle and with them. You can follow their Instagram. You can save 25% off all sexual wellness products (including the high-end brands!) at TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou using *code DRJESS25 You can check the courses mentioned in the podcast on the Happier Couples website. Mind Blowing Oral: Penis Edition and Mind Blowing Oral: Clit Edition . If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Hand Job Tips & One Hotwife's  Story 0:05 You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. 0:14 Welcome to the sexual doctor. Just podcast. I'm your co host Brandon. We're here with my always lovely other half Doctor Jess. Hi. How are you feeling? 0:24 I have a piece of frozen meat on my forehead. 0:26 Yeah, it's the door your head they met today. 0:30 I just went to turn off the dryer so that there wouldn't be noise in the background and coming. 0:37 Welcome to our home studio. 0:39 I pulled my I pulled the door right into my head and smacked it and then saw stars. That's awesome, but we're unscheduled. We got to do 0:46 to get it done. Yeah, you gotta you gotta meet up on the head there. And 0:50 it's, it's frozen for you. What do you call it when it's a ceiling range? Free Range. It's vacuum sealed, sealed. It's vacuum sealed corned beef on my head that my mom bought me that we're having for dinner. No, it's not for dinner. I don't know if we're gonna be able to eat it after my heart had melted. Anyhow. Welcome. Oh, I'm out of breath from that. Today we are talking about hot wifing Yes, and hot wifing and handjobs. Yes. And earlier today I was shooting with TSC in Canada doing little clips of I don't know how many sex toys like 40 different sex toys for the tsc.ca/intimately you where you can shop 1:30

Nov 26

38 min 45 sec

What does it mean to be non-binary? How about gender fluid? And queer? Why does language matter? How can we reconnect with our bodies? How can we liberate ourselves from gender roles in the name of more pleasure? How can we effectively communicate our needs to partners? Non-Binary Gender & Sex Therapist-Turned Coach, Rae McDaniel joins us to answer these questions and more. Be sure to follow Rae's Instagram and Facebook accounts. As well, check out the Gender Fck for more information. And take advantage of holiday pricing and discount code* DRJESS25 at TSC.ca where you can shop for: High On Love The Minis Pleasure Collection Romp Toys We-Vibe Moxie Chrystalino Glass Dildo If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Finding Pleasure in Liberation: Gender, Body Image & Communication 0:05 You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. 0:15 Welcome to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon. We're here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. 0:22 Hey, today we are talking about gender. So we're going to go over some terminology talk about gender roles and how they affect pleasure and sex and relationships. And so a lot of pressure right around gender, I would think kind of growing up you had expectations as a boy what you're supposed to do what you're not supposed to do, even as a man, you're an adult man now, right, 0:41 right. Yeah, I've been told I'm physiologically an adult man. Yeah, you're still a boy. 0:46 Okay, but so much pressure. I didn't I mean, certainly for women. I just feel like the pressure kind of comes from all angles. And it you know, it happens in the bedroom, in the living room, in the boardroom, all across the board. And so we're going to be talking with Ray McDaniel, who's going to just help us to unpack some of the the messaging and maybe make some small changes for happier lives and better sex and before we welcome ray to the conversation, I want to give a big shout out to TS see and intimately you so intimately you is the show that I host in partnership with TSC it airs on Citytv Fridays at midnight in Canada and if you're not in Canada, you can watch it at tsp.

Nov 19

40 min 26 sec

What is pegging, and how do you get started? How do you choose the right harness and strap-on? What are the best positions for pegging? Why do you lose your erection during butt play? What are the best toys for all types of orgasms? What is the difference between a fetish and a kink? Luna Matatas joins us to answer these questions and much more as she walks us through sex across Canada — from Charlottetown, PEI to Lions Bay, BC. Check out our recommendations below, as well as Lovehoney’s Sex Map of Canada: Best quiet toy (oral simulator): Womanizer Premium  Best quiet toy (newcomer): Ioba OMG Best Clone-A-Willy: Lovehoney Best Stroker: Lovehoney Blowmotion Real Feel — Save 25% this month with code* DRJESS25 Best Advanced Penis Toy: ArcWave Ion Follow Luna on her Twitter and Instagram accounts. As well, check out her website and her podcast, The Plug. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Pegging, Fetishes & Sex Toys 0:05 You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the sex of Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon. We're here with my always lovely other half to Dr. Jess. Hello. How are you? 0:23 I'm amazing. I'm kind of like I'm on top of the world because my work is getting back to normal. I got to host a couple's retreat last weekend over in the UK. And that felt so damn good. I mean, you were there. You know, you weren't at the retreat. But you were at the bar after with me. 0:39 Yeah, and you were definitely in great spirits. And I got to walk around London, which was amazing. Because London is an amazing city. 0:46 It really is a cool city. All the Marvel they took from all over the world made it a beautiful beautiful place a story for another day. But yeah, I'm feeling really good. It feels just I'm sure everybody's having kind of small victories as we slowly very very slowly inch our way back to some normalcy depending on where where folks are living. And yeah, I guess we probably get these glimmers of hope or excitement and then I'm sure there are of course setbacks as well. But I'm also off to Boston tomorrow, or Harvard sex week. 1:18 I just want to walk around and ask if anybody's past gas because I love the Bost...

Nov 12

35 min 30 sec

Harper The Fox joins Jess & Brandon to share her story — 2 weeks postpartum. She talks about her work in camming, cartoon cam models, working on OnlyFans and Chaturbate while pregnant & the importance of supporting mental health for sex workers. Check out Jewelry.sex if you'd like to support Harper and, even better, support Pineapple Support. All 2021 profits will be donated to help provide free and low-cost mental health support to any and all active sex workers with the therapists at Pineapple Support. And to stay up to date with Harper, follow her Twitter, and learn more about when her new book, "The Grateful Winter" (working title), comes out, get notified from HarperTheFox Books. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Camming, Mental Health & Motherhood 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight in welcome to the sex with dr podcast. I'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess. Hey how are you feeling feeling all right. Pretty good getting back into the groove of things. Yeah and today. We're actually going to be chatting with harper. The fox awesome name. Es and you weren't here. The last time harper was on the program but harper is a performer and digital entrepreneur and her unedited sex tapes feature her having real loving sex with her partner of a boat. I think ten years. Now 'cause i think it was around seven years the last time we talked. And i definitely recommend you go back and listen to the old episode with harper. Because in our last conversation she shared like just kind of really unique sites into camping into porn. She's also a poet. I think she talked about how to use toilet. Paper rolls sex dolls. There was a lot of a lot of conversation there. So she's she's coming back to update us on her work post pregnancy because she just had a baby like two weeks ago. I'm very intrigued on multiple levels here. I'm still going back to thinking about the sex dolls toilet paper rolls. So i will need to revisit dot podcast so Before harper joins us. I wanted to talk about a topic. That has come up in a couple of my recent interviews and then when i've posted about it i've received a lot of what would be the word passionate response from folks around going to bed angry. Well told me more. I'm not really sure where to take this charles so basically we started with this conversation around. Is there any truth to the phrase never go to sleep angry at your partner or is it a myth and so thinking about our relationship. We've definitely gone to bed angry. You try not to go to feel. We've i've tried to rectify an issue. But i still am angry when i go to. Bed doesn't happen very often but it more but i think back. We used to fight at night. Do remember that we still do fight. It just tends to happen and actually. That's something i should probably reflect on. Why do i start fights. Or why do i get into arguments late at night and don't feel like it happens as much as of late but i remember like a time where it would be an i mean i know why i. I don't know why. I think. I know why we fought at night. That's when you come together it will only time. We have privacy right downstairs in the living room. My dad's the dining room. It adds to the office.

Nov 5

45 min 25 sec

We love hearing from you, and this week, we answer your sex and relationship questions including: How do I help my partner relax and enjoy hotter sex? Should we open our relationship up to swinging? How do I deal with my friends shaming me for making porn? Should I share my secret erotica with my wife? To learn more on the Mindful Sex Course mentioned in the podcast, check it out here. You can save 25% off all sexual wellness products (including the high-end brands!) at TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou using *code DRJESS25 Includes whole suite of products from Womanizer including the Premium Eco and the Arcwave Ion (the penis version). The code also works on the Tightra, a device that helps you work on incontinence, bladder control, lubrication, and sexual functions. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Seduce & Make Sex More Pleasurable 00:00:05 - 00:05:16 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast. i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess willow. Hello how're you doing. Good how about you. I'm great thanks for asking Angry because today we're doing a qna. And i get to read a bunch of questions and put you on the spot as to what the answers are gonna put you on the spot. I i know you are. We've been receiving so many questions and so many emails. And i want to quickly note to folks that if you can send them the our website that's easier for me than through instagram. I tried to get to the ones on instagram. But sometimes they get lost. And i can't always get to them. So if you sent your questions and we haven't gotten to them please feel free to resend them via the website. Because i do try and get to them. And even if i can't answer them here i try and send you links and stuff like that. But i've been having trouble keeping up with instagram. And it's funny. Because i don't know where this message went but somebody wrote me a message and i can't find it. Now so this is you please resend it about how i guess. I said something about not writing a five paragraph essay. When you're sending me or questions sometimes when i'm here on the mike i feel like i'm just talking to brandon a...

Oct 29

27 min 2 sec

Sex educator Justine Ang Fonte joins us to talk about porn literacy, how parents can talk to kids about pleasure, and how we can set boundaries with friends, loved ones, and partners. She shares the three things parents should consider when talking to kids about sex and online content as well advice on how to get over our discomforts talking about sex. She also walks us through some challenging scenarios and provides scripts for saying no and asking for what you want. If you need help setting a boundary, DM @_good.byes, and Justine will do her best to help you out! And be sure to follow Justine on her Instagram and Twitter accounts! And if you have any questions about sexual health, be sure to tune into Tightra’s Facebook Live on October 27th at 8 pm ET. Tightra is an at-home device to improve urinary incontinence and improve sexual functioning. Learn more here and use code* DRJESS25 to save. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher!  *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Porn Literacy, Communication & Setting Boundaries With Loved Ones 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight! Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co-host Brandon Ware, here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Hello today. We are going to be talking ghosting and boundaries and porn literacy and much more with the lovely Justine Ang Fonte. Are are you good at boundaries. Not good at all boundaries really. Think you're good at boundary. I'm terrible but i think you're much better than me like i guess next to a f- student like me. If you're a see that that looks pretty good. You look like a bar is low. I've got a. I've got a low bar. I mean in some ways and with some people. I'm getting better. But i find that if i've if i've been poor at setting boundaries for awhile. It's hard for me to start them whereas in newer relationships. I can be a bit better. So we're going to have to get into. It would just dean but before she joins us. I wanna let you know about an online event. I have coming up with tight tightrope by silken so. This is on october twenty seventh so this coming wednesday at eight pm. I'm going to be talking sexual health and pleasure and taking all of your sexual health questions live on faceboo...

Oct 22

40 min 23 sec

Dr. Sonjia, the author of the best-selling book Sex in South Beach, joins us to talk about the intersection of sexuality and medicine, how to have better sex, and the ultimate date night indulgence. Follow Dr.Sonjia on her Twitter and Instagram accounts to stay up to date. And to learn more about her practice drop by her website and listen to her podcast, Sex in South Beach. Check out our amazing sponsor Ioba Toys for their OhMyG and OhMyC toys! The OhMyG (G-Spot massager) and the OhMyC (clitoral massager) fit in the palm of your hand and are both super silent. Don't forget to use my discount code DRJESS to get 30% off. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Date Night Special & Sex In South Beach 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight the podcast. I'm your host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half. Dr jess you've been. Mia i have been in a long time. Since i've heard you say you're the i don't even know what you say you're the co host the co-pilot i i'm here back and today. We're gonna be talking about some interesting topics at the intersection of sex and medicine. What makes sex good. What makes a date night. Successful this also. I'm very interested in what makes sex good. I really miss that. Will what makes good to you. Who excitement while. That's so vague. I know you're put me on the spot. I think it kind of just depends how i'm feeling. Sometimes they want you to do new things sometimes what you do the same things. So what determines like whether sex was good or bad we've had sex in the last week and you know one time was good and one time wasn't as good. What's the difference. I'm trying to think so for me. It's just being in the right mindset being relaxed in one time there. I find the sex a whole lot more intense like i find. I can really zone in so for me. It doesn't sound sexy at all but what makes sex is just being in the right head space like being present. Yeah being present. And being into the moment because i find what undistracted i just don't enjoy sex's much will you say it doesn't sound sexy but that's a lot of what the data says right is like good lovers good. Lovers are present in the moment and not thinking about performing yet. And i think people want i mean i talk to people and i think they're hoping for a magic pill. If you do this everything will always be awesome. And just like the arch position. Please tell me. I have this Press up out right now. I have to respond. To and it's about how to do the arch position so for the arch position I guess person okay. So one person does a bridge like you know like they put their hands already. Hurt myself so i don't even know what breast gymnastic bridge not like the yoga bridge. Okay beginning this wrong so please. Don't you talking about a back bridge back. Bend liquid hanan. I do on the paddleboard. So folks you imagine you're standing straight up and you're standing with your feet on the ground and then you lean back and put your hands on the ground. Of course you can do it from lying on your back as well. It's like a backwards. You yes yes. So you're like a rainbow so is descriptive people. But the rest. Because i feel like. I've already pulled my penis points so you would get into a back...

Oct 15

36 min 58 sec

What is a trauma trigger? How does it show up in the body? How can you recognize your triggers and communicate your needs to your partner? As the partner of someone who has experienced trauma, how can you be more supportive? Therapist Anna Baxter joins us to share their knowledge about therapy, trauma, working with couples, and more. They’ve also kindly shared this resource to help you communicate your needs to your partner. Follow Anna on their Twitter and Facebook accounts to stay up to date. Check out the Love Positive Counseling website to learn more! And don’t forget to check out Intimately You With Dr. Jess — Fridays at midnight on CityTV presented by TSC. You can save 25% off all sexual wellness products (including the high-end brands!) at TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou using *code DRJESS25 If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Trauma Triggers In Relationships 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice. You can use tonight today. We are talking about trauma and how it affects sex and relationships and i am by gender and relationship therapist ana baxter thank you so much for being here very welcome now. You work with folks in relationships singles groups all of the above. What have you been seeing over the last little while any shifts in challenges or reasons why people are coming in. oh yeah with the pandemic. We've had so much more. Just general depression and anxieties and stuff like that And lots of relationships who are starting to realize like. Oh when i'm trapped in a house with somebody Necessarily work anymore. And i'm to try this poly-amorous thing but she didn't know how it goes. When people try us. Paul pauline marie to fix broken relationship. Yes and is is it often one person hoping to. Yeah yeah what do you do when one partner really wants to open up. Especially when they started as monogamous and the other partners not so keen. We usually start with kind of understanding that. Paul amory's a valid option. And then we kind of get into a little bit of education about neurological change of thoughts and feelings. Is that sort of thing to kind of support the partner who's not early thinking about all.

Oct 8

24 min

Superstar Tyomi Morgan shares her advice and insights on Authentic Tantra and how you can integrate the practice into your life for more pleasure and connection — in and out of the bedroom. To learn more about Tyomi, follow her on her Instagram and Twitter accounts. And don’t forget that TSC’s Intimately You With Dr. Jess is launching for season 2 on CityTV tonight (October 1, 2021) at midnight. Tune in for a great discussion on sex and aging with Dr. Jessica Shepherd. And if you’re shopping for sexual wellness products at TSC.ca, be sure to use DRJESS25 for a deep discount!* If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Tantra with Tyomi 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey hey it is a good day for me today. I hope it's a good one for you as well. I even though i'm without brandon. Today i'm about to be joined by superstars sexologist model instructor sex educator tie you mean morgan who is just honestly so incredible. And i think you're really going to going to enjoy this conversation and we're gonna be talking about touch and taunt tra and breath and so much more and also really excited. Because i have some really good news october first so for many of you. That's today is the launch of season. Two of intimately you dr just presented by tse and it is a tv show on city tv across canada fridays at midnight and you can also watch the replay from anywhere in the world that tse dot ca slash intimately you which of course is quite the mouthful. Maybe not good kind of full. So i'll definitely put the lincoln the show notes. It's also you can always get these key links. My instagram bio. We've got all of those there if you wanna check them out anyhow with the show i'm going to be hosting weekly discussions exploring a bunch of exciting and also explicit topics related to relationships and sex and intimacy with some really incredible experts and medical professionals. And this week's episode is all about sex post menopause so we're going to be talking. Menopause menopause postmenopausal with the fabulous. Dr jessica shepherd a friend of mine so do please make sure you tune in and every week to catch new episodes on just a a broad range of themes.

Oct 1

32 min 26 sec

Maggie (our student intern), interviews Dr. Ryan Conrad, an activist, artist, and scholar. They discuss activism within academia, issues within queer politics, radical openness, sex work, and more. Dr. Conrad shares insight on his contradicting feelings related to academia, gay marriage, and intersectional versus co-constituted identity. And of course, Dr. Conrad shares his career story and advice for those looking to work in the field of sexuality. To see more of Dr. Conrad’s work, check out http://www.faggotz.org. Thank you to our sponsor, AdamAndEve.com — use code DRJESS for 50% off almost any item + FREE shipping + FREE gifts today! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Maggie (00:00): Hi everyone, my name is Maggie, I’m a student at Concordia University in the Simone de Beauvoir institute, and I’ve been working as Dr. Jess’ intern over the summer. I initially started this mini podcast series initially to explore different jobs in the sexuality field, as a resource for people who might be interested in a career in sexuality. However, during my interviews I found that much more interesting topics came up, like sex education, “sexperts,” racial and social justice, sex and disability, activism in academia, sex and substance abuse, sex and cancer, queer and sex worker politics, prison abolition, health care, and a whole range of topics related to sex and sexuality. So in this podcast, I’ll be speaking with Dr. Ryan Conrad, who I know because he was my first professor within the sexuality program. And Dr. Conrad is really interesting because he is both an anarchist and an academic. He’ll be talking about some really important issues like queer politics, activism in academia, sex worker research, and more. Hi, Ryan, thank you for talking to me today. How are you?   Dr. Ryan Conrad (01:10): Hi, Maggie, I'm doing well.   Maggie (01:12): That's good to hear. So jumping right in, on your website, you describe yourself as an activist, an artist, and an academic. Can you briefly go over some of the work that you do?   Dr. Ryan Conrad (01:20): Yeah, so I sort of go by all of those titles, when it's useful to be one of them, if that makes sense, in terms of making oneself legible in certain situations. So sometimes I'm an activist, sometimes an artist, sometimes a scholar or an academic, and sometimes all three at the same time. But I'm very much by any medium necessary, if that makes sense. So depending on the goal of what I'm doing, I'm more of an activist or an artist or a scholar. And so I work sort of at the intersections of sexual liberation, queer politics, sex worker politics. And I do everything from teaching in sort of more academic settings, to running workshops and stuff in more community based settings, as well as making cultural production or cultural work, whether it's film or video or performance, sometimes just visual art. So maybe what I'm trying to say is I'm a multidisciplinary, interdisciplinary kind of person, and depending on what the goal of a particular event or situation or experiences I engage in, in different forms, different practices, to sort of make things happen, so to speak.   Maggie (02:26): I love that. And I think those three titles, you know, academic, artist,

Sep 24

27 min 17 sec

Can you handle rejection? Have you practised this essential life skill? What can you learn from rejection? And how can you check your avoidance behaviours? Couples and Intimacy Therapist, Brittanni Young, joins us to share her powerful insights on rejection, expectations, avoidance, and more. Follow Brittanni on her Twitter and Instagram accounts to stay up to date with her work. To learn more about the Sex Down South Conference held in Atlanta, GA, check out their website for past guests and workshop information. And follow their Twitter and Instagram! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Manage Rejection 00:00:05 - 00:05:06 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey hey and welcome. This is jess all my lonesome. Because i am down at sex down south in atlanta. And if you're not familiar with sex down south it is the sexuality conference to attend. It's run by my friends. Marlene stewart and the lovely tm. Marie and it is a life changing conference for so many of us in terms of its capacity to build a really special community to make connections to make space to hold space to even galvanize movements and honestly so much more. I was learned so much. Not only in the sessions and keynotes but also just in the conversations in the hallways and the after hours dance parties and i just really highly recommend it for anyone who has any interest in sex. It is is really just a must attend if you're working in the field or thinking about it and i really believe it's just as meaningful if you're not and of course. It costs money to attend conferences. But they do have scholarships available for those in need. And i'm also happy to support with some additional scholarships if you're someone who has financial barriers and you do want to attend in the future so start by following along to see what sex down south is about and see what they're doing next. It is on instagram. They are s. d. s. con like sex down south conso. Sds khan and it's sex down south everywhere else. And yeah i just really wanna thank sex for bringing me back welcoming me back kind of i just feel like they very quickly welcomed me into the fold and a had a lot of my. I hear one thing i think about is my first crying in public strangers. Because i was just honestly so moved i think by the feeling of being cared for and feeling safe and even fitting in which is A little bit hard for me. So i really hope to be coming back every year. Because it's just. I don't know such a special place so do check them out. And now we're gonna talk about a topic that super important topic that they are covering at the conference today. We are talking about rejection. Would it is what it feels like some of the evolutionary holdovers how to handle it how to respond how to even lean into rejection and practice being rejected and really how to learn from it and this is such an important life skill. I'm just. I'm so glad we're talking about it because i personally. I know i have so much to learn here joining me. Now is britney young couples and intimacy therapist. Is that how you describe yourself. i'd say so. It covers the basis. All right and so. You see primarily couples. Do you also see individuals or triads or anything like that.

Sep 17

27 min 42 sec

Feeling tense or distracted? Looking to feel more connected to your body and/or more present in the current moment? Carve out a few minutes to reset with our guided body scan from our Mindful Sex course. In under ten minutes, you should be on your way to feeling more relaxed and more open to all types of connection (and pleasure). And if you want to explore additional exercises and strategies for mindfulness with a focus on pleasure, connection, and intimacy, be sure to check out our self-paced Mindful Sex course. It includes over 20 video/audio guides and dozens of strategies and exercises to help you slow down, de-stress and savour every last moment — in and out of the bedroom. If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen allow="autoplay" Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. The Body Scan 00:00:05 - 00:05:06 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey it's just here. And i am flying solo this week because we are doing something a little differently this because been a little bit of a stressful week and one thing i've noticed. Is that my tolerance for stress seems to be lower than usual and i've been chatting with friends who are basically saying the same thing and i i guess i don't know so much has changed. I think a lot of us are feeling like our patients is thinner than usual. And i know for me. It can be tied to anxiety for other people. It can be tied to depression or hyper vigilance. Or the unknown and other issues as well. What i'm finding is that it's hard to nail it down like i find myself snapping over the smallest little things earlier today. The the closet door wasn't opening properly. the carpet was in the way and in the moment i was so pissed like it was the end of the world at the carpet was blocking me from. I don't remember if i was open. Air closing the door and those types of experiences like being irritated with those little things. They're really new to me. I've just never felt this way kind of at any point in my life. And i don't think i ever really let little stressors get to me. And even big stressors have always felt manageable. In fact i actually think. I enjoy stress which i know. Some people can't believe but that's that's a whole other conversation about you know dopamine and thriving and disruption and i know my therapist would say it's a function of adhd. And that. i. I need things to raw me up to create dopamine and i guess my i'm talking a lot about myself here about my life has always been full of those things that are a little bit stressful but positive with my work and of course a lot of them are on hold the pandemic and then so the negative stressors they start to rally up in a nice way but they don't have the same effect right. You get a little riled up which i need but you know unlike running late for a flight or being nervous about getting on stage which can be exciting. The stuff that i'm dealing with so some families staff somehow staff These stressors obviously don't get my dopamine going us or gives me that tees of the feeling in my body but not the excitement and the anticipation. I'm used to and so bottom line is i'm just snappier than usual and kind of wish. Brennan was here to make fun of me.

Sep 10

15 min

Board-certified gynecologic surgeon and author of This Is How You Vagina, Dr. Nicole Williams joins us to share her knowledge and wisdom on the following questions and more. What makes discharge normal? How can you tell if something is awry? What myths hold us back from loving our vaginas? Why might your vulva be itchy? How do fibroids affect sex and pleasure? Follow Dr. Nicole on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and The Gynecology Institute of Chicago website. And don’t forget to check out our awesome video course, Mind Blowing Oral: Clitoral Edition. Use discount code PODCAST for 25% off! And if you love a penis, you can use the same code to save on the Penis Pleasure version as well. If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Happy Vaginas, Fibroids & Discharge 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice. You can use tonight. Welcome to the second doctor. just podcast. i'm your co host brandon. Where here with my lovely other. Half dr jess hey. I'm ready to talk vaginas. Are you ready to talk vaginas. I'm ready to talk vaginas and learn about vaginas. Did you learn about vaginas. Growing up. In what i learned in school. Which which probably everyone learned that was about it. Okay what did you learn in school. Specifically about vaginas. What did you learn. I can't remember what. I just remember basic sexual anatomy so what it was what its purpose was and we definitely didn't learn about any pleasure. Okay so what did they teach. You was the purpose. Well there was babies. Which i know not in the vagina per se and then obviously other anatomical functioning. I mean if you had you know that you re thrown going p but that was a bit okay so they actually taught you that there was a separate whole to piazza. Yes i recall that. Yep because we didn't. I don't think i learned that. Like i think i kind of for longtime thought the vagina and the youth for with the same interesting. No i do remember it being separate. Because i remember you learning about the you. Re threat for penises as well okay. So let's talk names. did you have like. What did your parents call the penis. I only remember it being called the penis. I can't remember if i was a kid if it was called something else when i was a little little kid i mean maybe my pb or something like that. But i never. It was never called anything else and did your parents use the word penis freely. Like i can't picture your dad's saying penis. I definitely wouldn't say that it was used freely but when we had to address it if there was something it was what it was. Which was the penis. Okay okay. now i'm thinking about my childhood. My parents call. I guess the vagina the pongy. So pongy i. I don't know if it's from the jamaican side. It could be the chinese side. Or probably some combo of chinese jamaican it was always called the pongy And i can't for the life of me. Remember when i learned that it was actually called vagina or vulva volvo. I learned when i was in. I think university. But i did have a book called. Where do i come from. Which was this cartoon illustrated book out how babies are made so pongy was the word. I'm wondering if anybody else's parents called it the pongy like i'm saying oh maybe it was for my jamaican side. Maybe it was chinese jamaican.

Sep 3

29 min 30 sec

Are you holding onto resentments? Is resentment holding you back from being present and full of joy? Do you have difficulty expressing how you feel or do you feel confined to specific roles? Tune into this conversation with psychotherapist Roxanne Francis as she guides us through: How resentment builds How to let go of resentment in relationships How resentment is tied to avoidance and vulnerability Techniques to move through the process of managing resentment — from both sides Ways to process emotions constructively Keep up to date with the registered social worker and psychotherapist Roxanne Francis through her website or on her Instagram and Twitter accounts. This episode is brought to you by AdamAndEve.com — use code DRJESS to save 50% on almost any item + get free shipping and some extra free gifts too! If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Let Go Of Resentment 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. We'll come to the doctor jazz. Podcast i don't know i'm singing. You just wanted to change it up a little. Yes are you taking requests. Absolutely not but i am going to throw a karaoke party wants to do it. What i am in iraq out kariuki is the last thing to come back because of all of the screaming into the night. There is no singing. It is just screaming and spitting everywhere. I would like to hear return of the mack. I'm a throw some d's on it is what i'm gonna do okay. Fine fine today. We're not talking karaoke. We are talking resentment We're gonna talk about what it is how to let go of it. And we're about to joined by the roxanne francis an award-winning registered social worker and psychotherapist at consultant and speaker. She has been working with companies and people all over the world to achieve their mental health goals for over a decade. She is the owner of francis psychotherapy and consulting services where she provides psychotherapy to individuals in the community. She also does clinical supervision for other therapists and does a whole bunch of consultation with organisations around mental health in the workplace around diversity equity and inclusion around burnout who a lot of us are feeling that right. Now around children's mental health around parenting. She's also a media mental health expert. Which is how. I got to know her. And you'll see her on newscasts and print and online publications. Pretty much everywhere. How did she find time for this podcast so busy i know. I just forced my way in their into her. I g fox in joins us. I want to send a huge shout out to our sponsors adam and eve who have yet extended their promo for fifty percents off almost any item plus free shipping and a whole series of free surprise gifts with code dr jeff so be sure to check them out at adam and eve dot com. I was actually online shopping. And i noticed a bunch of their lingerie and hot fetish wear is on sale right now so i have my eye on something called the scandal. Full length bodysuits or brennan. You should actually go check it out. I know you're none of them in my size. Probably that would be amazing. Look great at it. I mean. I know you're not a shopper. By the talking about for me you know the last time you bought me closed remember.

Aug 27

39 min 51 sec

This week, we flip the scripts and our intern, Maggie Lee, interviews Jess about her journey into the field of sexuality. They talk education, equity, the business of sex and Jess shares her insights for the next generation of sexuality professionals. Womanizer and We-Vibe is having a sale! Use code DRJESS to save a few extra from products such as the Starlet to the Wish. And do check out the latest book by Jess and Marla Stewart, "The Ultimate Guide to Seduction & Foreplay," right here. If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 1 Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. This week, we’re doing something a little different. Our lovely intern Maggie, who is studying Sexuality at Concordia University, is doing a series of interviews on working in the field of sexuality and I was her first interviewee, so we’re going to share that conversation with you. Before we dive into that, I want to shout out the Womanizer & We-Vibe sales. We-vibe has my favourite toy, The Touch on sale as well as a number of others like the Wish, and the Tango at We-Vibe.com and Womanizer also has a few products on sale including the Starlet, which is under $50 at Womanizer.com - please use code DRJESS to save a few extra $ and to let them know that you heard about them here. I told you last week about all the positive feedback I’ve been receiving regarding the Womanizer Starlet from online messages to people stopping me in the airport, so do check it out at Womanizer.com Alright, without further ado, let’s get to our interview. In this conversation, I talk about my personal journey into the sexuality field, the challenges, the rewards, how I carved my path, what I’ve learned and what I foresee for the future. Check it out. Here’s Maggie taking over the mic... Maggie: The first person I'm going to be interviewing is Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, otherwise known as Dr. Jess. She's a sexpert, a media personality, the host of the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, she’s an author and educator, amongst other things. So Hi, Dr. Jess, thanks for chatting with me today. How are you? Dr. Jess: Great. Thanks for having me, happy to be chatting. Maggie: Happy to have you. So because we're talking about careers, I'm going to start with, what is it that you actually do for a living? Could you please describe your professional work in the sexuality field? Dr. Jess: Absolutely. So I'm a speaker and an educator. So I work with groups, primarily adults, and primarily couples, who want to work on their relationships, want to enhance their sex lives, want to improve their communication skills, their intimacy, their connection. And my work really entails traveling to host a range of different workshops. So I'm not really seeing people one on one, it's all group work. Sometimes it's what we call a brief intervention, or I guess they're all fairly brief interventions for hours, maybe a couple of days, and we work through the group process. So that's what the bulk of my work entails. And then I support that work, and I suppose promote that work via the media side. So I host a television show. I have, of course my podcast, the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast, I write for publications, and I contribute to mainstream media publications on a daily basis. Maggie: That's so interesting. Thank you for that.

Aug 20

32 min 51 sec

This week we share our relationship check-in -- short(ish), sweet and unscripted. Most couples invest in the start-up phase of their relationships (e.g. the wedding and honeymoon) and then they set themselves on autopilot without formally discussing their feelings, desires, goals and needs — until something goes wrong. By scheduling weekly or monthly check-ins, you can reduce tension, improve understanding and nip issues in the bud before they erupt into bigger problems. Relationship check-ins do not need to follow a specific format. They can be semi-formal (e.g. a conversation with notes over brunch) or more casual (a text chain you update every afternoon). It’s up to you to decide what works for you knowing that the more you talk about your feelings, needs and concerns, the more likely you will be to meet one another’s expectations. You might start with these three simple prompts: How are you feeling right now? How are you feeling in this relationship? How can I support you at this moment in time? Or you can take a little more time to delve into some additional topics: 1. How are you feeling today? This is your opportunity to let your partner know where you’re at emotionally. This can help set the tone for the meeting, so be honest so that your partner understands how you’re feeling and responds with support. 2. How are you feeling about our relationship? This is also an important question to ask yourself. Consciously consider how you feel about the relationship so that you can make changes and requests as needed. With kids, work and other commitments, we don’t have the time to resolve every conflict, discuss every moment of discomfort or talk about every concern. 3. Is there anything on your mind that is bothering, worrying or stressing you out? Because you have your own life outside of the relationship, your partner may not know what’s going on with your work, business and friendships. 4. Is there anything you’re working on that you’d like to discuss? This question might relate to health or fitness goals, something your therapist suggested you work on or a desired mindset. 5. What is on the horizon for the next week/month? This is an opportunity to ensure you’re both on the same page. You might discuss schedules, workloads or family responsibilities. Planning ahead is essential to happy, harmonious relationships. 6. What can I do to support you? The previous questions focus on how you’re feeling, and this one allows you to shift the focus to your partner. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and be as specific as possible when making requests. 7. How are you feeling about our sex life? Most people don’t talk about sex until something is wrong, but couples who make sex talk a habit have more frequent and satisfying sex. When they run into sexual challenges (e.g., lack of desire or a decline in frequency), they’re equipped to work through the issue, as sexual communication is the norm, not an exception that becomes associated with problems. If this broad question feels too daunting, consider an alternative: What did you like about the last time we had sex? And we can't forget about our sponsors, save 50% off almost any item in the store at Adam & Eve. PLUS free shipping PLUS a bunch of little free gifts this week use code DRJESS. Or check out Womanizer and We-Vibe with code DRJESS to save a little more on their products! Pre-Register for the Couples Master Class: 50 Exercises For Successful Relationships. The course designed to increase passion, boost communication, heighten intimacy and spark eroticism within your relationship. Get 50% off this course when you pre-register! If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean,

Aug 13

28 min 31 sec

We respond to your questions about sleep orgasms, ruined orgasms, forced orgasms, vaginal taste and more. Check out our sponsor Adam & Eve. They have restarted the discount code DRJESS for 50% off almost any item in the store PLUS free shipping. And on top of that a bunch of free gifts included. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Q&A: Ruined Orgasms, Sleep Orgasms & More 00:00:05 - 00:05:03 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight welcome to the sex with dr just podcast. I'm your co host. Brendan where here with my always. Lovely other dr jess he he. How's it going feeling good today. I'm excited for jonathan. Who's jonathan and. Why are we excited for them. Thanks for loving that. Charles boyle jonathon s. is the winner of our contests are review contests. So i wanna say thank you to everybody for submitting reviews and shooting us messages and a special thanks to folks who also sent feedback personally to two invalid sex with dr dot com because we do read it all and we do find it really helpful and we try and take it into account and change things for the better. Of course. we can't do every single thing because not everybody wants the same thing but really do appreciate i did get some comments about sound about sometimes the interviews being too quiet from the guest and then we're too loud and so we are always working on those things. I'm hoping that the course of the last year the quality has been significantly better in terms of sound. But you know we are recording from home right now. We have a one room in our house. Set up a studio but it's not a professional studio we call it the studio but it's it's not and we recorded from wild places like hiding in a closet to try and find not here at home but will more on the roads so really do appreciate your patience. Your feedback really open to hearing from you as well. So thank you so much in a big congratulations to jonathan ass. Jonathan has one on lobbying it up for you. We vibe touch my absolute favorite toy of all time personally and we're going to be sending it out so they've come up with a new version called the touch ex but the we vibe touched that original is still my favorite. And i have a feeling they're going to be i'm guessing discontinuing soon since they have the new version so jonathan's going to be receiving one of those touches and hopefully they love it as much as i do and we will be in touch with you jonathan to set that up again. Thank you so much to everyone who entered and please do keep sending your feedback and your questions and that's exactly what we're going to do today and that is answer some of your questions because there are so many questions coming in and honestly i'm not able to keep up with all of them on many of them come in through the website some through instagram and We're gonna talk about the first set of questions on ruined orgasms. So i have these questions on. What is a ruined orgasm. Is it the same as forced orgasm does ruined orgasm mean. You don't have an orgasm. Is it really just edging. Have you ever had a ruined orgasm. I'd love to know what a ruined orgasm is. But i have ruined my own orgasms.

Aug 6

26 min 52 sec

What’s really average when it comes to penis size and does it really matter? How do we get over our hang ups around size so that we can all feel confident in our bodies? Should you use certain positions according to size? And are condoms really one-size-fits-all? Jess and Brandon share their perspectives and are joined by Milla Impola  of ONE condoms. Milla Impola is the Director of Marketing at ONE® Condoms, a brand of premium condoms and lubricants. ONE® is passionate about sexual health education and innovation. ONE® also launched the myONE® brand of 60 condom sizes. Knowing proper condom fit is key for pleasure and confidence in your condom, myONE helps resolve issues such as condom slippage, squeezing, and erection loss due to condoms being too tight or small. All ONE Condoms are vegan, non-GMO, made from natural rubber latex, and without any harmful chemicals. Follow One Condoms Instagram and Twitter to stay up to date with all things condom. And just a reminder! Adam & Eve has restarted the discount code DRJESS for 50% off  for almost any items in the store PLUS free shipping. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! And highly recommend a Penis Ring, We-Vibe Pivot, to enhance the penis. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Does size matter? 00:00:05 - 00:05:07 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex just podcast. I'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half. Who's trying to trip me up today on the intro. Not no. we're gonna talk penises there you go. We've been talking erections for the last few weeks and today we're gonna talk penis size because i get so many questions about pena size and they all start with dear mom or something like that and then they tell me their size sometimes they tell me how often they masturbate. And honestly you're all just fine like really you're just fine. Whatever measurement they send however many times a day or weekday masturbate. They're gonna be just fine. That could be the whole thing. That's the ted talk. Yeah you're fine okay. So we're going to be talking today about both penis size and condoms size and we're going to be how to properly fit a condom with milan. Poll from one condoms. I think is a really important conversation. I've learned a lot from her over the years. But i wanted you here to begin with to talk about your penis. Great grace okay. When did you become aware of the size of your penis or concerned about it. Why are you laughing okay. So i'm sorry. When did i become aware of the size of my penis. Start thinking about it. Did you do you even care. Probably started paying more attention to it when i was in or like the size not paying attention to. I paid attention to it a lot. Let me tell you. But i started paying more attention to size and perhaps being impacted by this intense desire or need to have a gigantic penis when i was in middle school. So what grades. Maybe like six through eight or maybe create five. You started just hearing about it and whether you knew why you were saying it like it started just becoming a thing that you said probably more middle school i did you say which just talking about this. About how big your penis was or how just talking more about it....

Jul 30

42 min 6 sec

Urologist, Dr. Denise Asafu-Ajei, joins us to answer your questions about erections: How can you prevent erectile dysfunction? How do you treat erectile issues? How do you know if erectile issues are psychological or physiological in nature? What can you do if you lose your erection? How do you manage anxiety to reduce negative feedback loops? Dr. Denise Asafu-Adjei is a urologist with subspecialty training in sexual dysfunction and male infertility. She completed a Fellowship in Andrology at University of California Los Angeles (UCLA). She will be joining the Urology Department at Loyola University in Chicago as the Medical Director of Male Reproductive Medicine. She completed her Urology residency at Columbia University Irving Medical Center and received her M.D. from the University of Michigan Medical School. She obtained an MPH in Health Policy and Management from the Harvard School of Public Health and a Bachelor of Science from Carnegie Mellon University. In the future, she aims to utilize clinical research and physician leadership to help healthcare systems achieve access to equitable and high quality healthcare for sexual dysfunction and male reproductive services. Follow Dr. Denise's Instagram and Twitter. Be sure to check out our sponsor, Lovehoney, as they’re having a big sale this week and you can save a little extra with code DRJESS10 If you want to enter our contest to win the awesome We-Vibe Touch, be sure to leave us a review on any of the podcast sites and then email us at info@sexwithdrjess.com so we can be sure to enter your name in the draw. We’ll choose (and notify) the winner August 2nd and announce on the podcast on August 6th. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Better Boners: Erection Facts, Fiction & Advice 00:00:05 - 00:05:01 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr jazz. Podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half doctor jess how you doing. I'm great today. we are. we're talking boehner's love me again boehner. Sometimes i love a good. Sometimes i can live without it. Yeah we're talking directions and we're going to be answering a listener question. That is a little bit similar to last week's but from this side of the person with the penis and of course there's no one better to weigh in on erections than our guest today. Urologist dr denise software agyei the incoming director of male reproductive medicine at loyola university in chicago Her resumes too impressive. She went from carnegie mellon to the university of michigan to harvard. To columbia to ucla. And she's going to help us. Better understand erections erectile dysfunction and discuss some preventative measures since erections tend to subside with age. And of course. You don't need a raging like joke about taking it or leaving it but the reality is there are so many ways to enjoy pleasure insects without a boehner as well i agree and i. I couldn't agree more that that c. I mean there's no one better to talk about this. Dr tennessee absolutely. I mean we won't say boehner doctor because it's much much more than that. Her specialties are run. Quite deep including male fertility so really looking forward to that conversation an...

Jul 23

40 min 2 sec

This podcast is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app for couples and singles where they're a pioneer in allowing couples to explore dating together as a pair. Feeld is for everyone from the experienced to the curious. Jess & Brandon answer listener questions related to erection loss, anxiety, libido, social norms and how to start difficult conversations. This episode is brought to you by Lovehoney. They’re having a summer sale and you can save a little extra with code DRJESS10! Here is a sampling of the questions we address: #1. My partner is able to get and retain a really bangin' erection and can reliably orgasm during any type of penile stimulation (hand jobs, oral, even just putting lube on my body and rubbing himself back and forth on me), but he quickly and consistently loses his erection during penetration. The only time he is able to maintain an erection during PIV sex is in roleplay situations where I'm pretending to be someone other than myself. Logically I know this issue isn't caused by anything I'm doing or not doing. We also have an amazing relationship and a strong emotional connection. But as this continues to happen it's starting to erode my self esteem--a nagging voice tells me that he's bored of having sex with me and doesn't want to make the effort unless I jump through hoops to make it extra exciting for him. I'm wondering what exactly is really going on here, how I can bring this up to him without making him feel like there's something wrong with him, (I don't want to make the problem worse by adding extra anxiety to him), and what we can do to help him maintain his erection during PIV sex. #2. Hi Dr.Jess, I’ve been listening to your podcast for a couple months now and I have a question dating focused: do you think leagues are a thing? Like when someone says “they’re out of their league” or “dating or marrying up” or “you’re a 5 and they’re a 10”. Although sometimes this refers to socioeconomic divides in terms of education, income rather than just physical attractiveness alone. But I wanted to know your thoughts on how you think these divides can be overcome as I hear this enough or have seen it sometimes get in the way of my friends’ relationship. #3. Firstly thank you for all you do. Your podcast is a huge source of comfort, inspiration and knowledge for me and I am excited every Friday to listen! I'm 27, my boyfriend is 26. We've been together for 7 months. He recently told me that he fantasizes about being dominated. Other than the occasional light choke or spank, I have not taken on that role before. I tend to prefer to be dominated, too, so while I'm happy to try it out, I am unsure how to begin and how to feel confident doing so. Separately, we are working on our communication in sex but I still struggle with initiating sex and talking about it for fear of rejection or being humiliated. I've been feeling like I want sex more than him but, because I don't know how to start it, I end up waiting for him to be in the mood. I end up feeling unattractive, like I'm unable to seduce my boyfriend. Even though logically I know that he sometimes might just be tired or not in the mood, and that's OK. Last week, after months of my internal agonizing, he brought up the subject and asked how I would describe my libido. He told me his was "changeable" and that sometimes he can tell I'm trying to make it happen but he just doesn't feel like it. He suggested I try telling him that I want him and that can sometimes get him in the mood, too. I now feel pressure to assert myself in a way I feel uncomfortable doing. I feel very vulnerable stating that I want sex, especially since I know that if he wanted it he would have initiated it already! I told him once that I felt the patriarchy made me less sexually assertive, because woman are taught to be passive, and he told me to stop blaming my problems on external factors. Any advice on both of these topics would be VERY much appreciated!

Jul 16

44 min 41 sec

In Part II of our threesome discussion, we share questions and prompts to consider before you have a threesome — for individuals and couples. We also share some of our listeners’ insights on threesomes and discuss couples’ privilege. Check out the questionnaires below and be sure to check out our sponsor Lovehoney, as they have the most innovative toys, props and lingerie. Use code DRJESS10 to save. (And if you’re curious about the Greedy Girl Thrusting G-Spot Vibe, check it out here!) Threesomes: Self-Questionnaire  Why do you want to have a threesome? Where did the idea of a threesome come from? How do you feel about this source? What benefits do you expect to derive from a threesome? What are the perceived risks/costs? With whom would you like to have a threesome? Do you know if they’re open to it? How might your relationship with your threesome mates change post-threesome? What excites you most about a threesome? What motivates you? What concerns you about a threesome? Do you have any hesitations? What emotional elements of a threesome have you considered? How will you manage potentially challenging emotions should they arise? Do you feel comfortable communicating your desires and boundaries? What conditions increase your comfort level with open communication? What does your ideal threesome entail? Consider the setting, relationships, involved parties, sex acts, etc.. Threesomes: Managing Jealousy, Insecurity & Distress  Am I comfortable admitting to feelings of jealousy, insecurity and distress? I tend to feel jealous/insecure/distressed when… When I feel jealous/insecure/distressed, it shows up in my body as…(emotional presence) When I feel jealous/insecure/distressed, I want to… When I feel jealous/insecure/distressed, I can self-soothe by… When I feel jealous/insecure/distressed, I’d like you to… When I feel jealous/insecure/distressed, I don’t want you to… You’ll know when I feel jealous/insecure/distressed when I…Some other cues to look for include… Threesomes: Couples’ Questionnaire  Whose idea was it? Do you feel any pressure? Have you (in)directly pressured your partner? Why do you/we want to have a threesome? What do you/we hope to get out of the experience? What are my/our concerns about the experience? Have we talked about jealousy, insecurity and other potentially challenging emotions we might encounter? What would it look like if it goes well? What might it look like if something goes awry? How will we communicate and respond? What do we value in a third-party? What type of person do we want to connect with? Do we want to involve a stranger, an acquaintance, a friend and/or a sex worker? Have we considered our couples’ privilege and how we can ensure that all voices are heard and respected? If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 221: How To Prep For A Threesome  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. me. Brandon (00:16): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:23): Hey, and it’s just the two of us here to talk threesomes. This is part 2,

Jul 9

34 min

Most people fantasize about threesomes, but not many people actually dive in. In part I of our Threesomes podcast, we dive into the data and get some practical advice from Justin Lehmiller who answers your questions including: How common are threesomes? What counts as a threesome? How does a threesome affect relationships for couples? Who is having threesomes? How do people find threesomes (e.g. through apps like Feeld)? What’s the appeal of threesomes? Next week, we’ll dive into how to prep for a threesome with prompts, conversations and more! Justin Lehmiller the Scientific Advisor to Feeld, and host of the Sex and Psychology Blog and Podcast. To stay up to date with The Kinsey Institute research fellow, follow his Instagram and Twitter! Feeld is the first dating app for couples and singles. They're a pioneer in allowing couples to explore dating together as a pair -- from ethical non-monogamy to alternative relationships and everything in between. Feeld is for everyone from the experienced to the curious. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 220: Threesomes: Who, What, Why & How?  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:15): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:22): Hey, hey. We are talking threesomes today. And it fits that today's episode is brought to you by Feeld. And Feeld is the first dating app for couples and singles, they’re a pioneer in allowing couples to kind of explore dating together as a pair. And they're open to all genders, all sexual identities, all sexual orientations, basically for anyone who's interested in either ethical non monogamy or alternative relationships structures, or simply those who are curious and looking to kind of dip their toe into the pond so do check them out. And you can download the Feeld app, it’s free, and you create a profile and once you have liked someone and they've liked you back on the app, you become connections and you're able to chat. And if you want to you can share photos and they also often offer an upgraded membership option with extra features and yeah, so do check out Feeld. They're one of the largest online communities for fun stuff like this. And it's interesting, I actually came across Feeld in my research a few years ago, when I was prepping a training for therapists on threesomes and ethical non monogamy. And they really are the perfect partner for this podcast, because we're talking about threesomes. And of course there are people on Feeld looking for threesomes. And later, we’re going to be talking with their expert Dr Justin Lehmiller, but before he joins us, I wanted to kind of dig into some of the data on threesomes. And later on, I also wanna talk if we have time about how to prepare for a three some, like in terms of communication and reflection and just topics to address before you start exploring. I don't know how much time we'll have. I might have to split it into a couple episodes, but we will get there. It's interesting because when you think about threesomes, don't you think porn has kind of made threesomes seem like the norm? Everybody’s doing them.

Jul 2

40 min 15 sec

Sydney Rae Chin joins us to share her personal experience as a closeted queer woman who grew up Chinese-American-Catholic. She shares some really valuable advice on how to navigate emotional consent and leaves us with tools for navigating boundaries and honouring our own values. They dive deep into conversation around polyamory, monogamy, and coming out to their family answering these questions and more! Can you have monogamous relationships as a polyamorous person? Can polyamory & monogamy co-exist in a relationship? How do you cultivate emotional consent and communicate emotional boundaries? How do you come out to family — as polyamorous or queer? How do culture and gender intersect with experiences of polyamory? To stay up to date with Sydney, check out her website and follow her on Instagram. Our wonderful partner Adam & Eve has extended their promo. Use code DRJESS to get 50% off almost any item including shipping PLUS a bunch of free goodies. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE #219: Polyamory, Coming Out & Emotional Consent  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:17): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half, Dr Jess, who is currently squeezing my nipple. Dr. Jess (00:26): I just wanted to see if he could keep going, and he did. Brandon (00:28): I did, I threw you a curve ball by telling everybody what you were doing at the beginning. Dr. Jess (00:34): How you doing today babe? Brandon (00:36): I'm great my nipples little sore. But otherwise I'm great. Thanks for asking, how are you? Dr. Jess (00:41): I’m good. I feel like your nipples have played a prominent role in the podcast the last few weeks. Because you were talking about I don't know, pinching nipples on my instagram and people were having a good time with that. I think my family unfollowed us, but we're okay with that. And I don't know, I feel like things are going really well right now because life is getting back to normal here in Canada. They're opening up some restrictions. Or I guess they're loosening the restrictions around travel. We are fully vaccinated, you and me. I got a pinch in my vaccination. The pharmacist pinched my arm and said “I like to pinch,” then she pinched my arm and then she gave me the jab. And I'm unclear as to whether or not she liked to pinch for the sake of the vaccine or she just generally liked to pinch and took the opportunity to pinch me, but either way I'm happy because I'm vaxxed. Brandon (01:29): Got my jabs in, and it feels so good. Dr. Jess (01:34): Anyhow, lots going on, just wanted to mention that my new show on CityTV presented by TSC is still running Friday nights here in Canada at midnight on CityTV. And it's called Intimately You With Dr. Jess and we’re already, I don't know almost two thirds through the season. We're at least halfway through season one and it's going pretty cool. I think it's so much fun to get to hawk sex toys on national TV. And I've got honestly, we have the coolest guest tonight. We're joined by Shanae Adams,

Jun 25

30 min 52 sec

Are you comfortable talking dirty? Do you feel silly trying new lines, approaches and scenarios? You’re not alone. Jess and Brandon share their struggles (while sharing a few laughs) and offer guidance & strategies for all types of dirty talk from sweet and romantic to naughty and kinky. They try out dozens of lines that you can practice on your own and share with a partner (or two!). Want to learn more about dirty talk? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Seduction and Foreplay co-authored by Marla Renee Stewart. And check out  IOBAToys.com for the OhMyC, a silent clitoral massager that fits in the palm of your hand. Use code DRJESS to save 30% off! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 218: Master Dirty Talk: 60+ Tips & Examples (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:16): Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:23): Hey, hey. Brandon (00:24): How are you? Dr. Jess (00:25): I'm fine. I want you to talk dirty to me. Brandon (00:28): I want you. I want you right now. You smiling and laughing at me doesn't help with the confidence here. Dr. Jess (00:36): I’m not laughing, I was just smiling at you. What do you think I want to hear in bed when I say talk dirty? Brandon (00:43): I think you want to hear that I want you that, I can't stop thinking about you. Dr. Jess (00:49): You never say that. If you know I want to hear that Brandon (00:51): I know it, it doesn't mean it’s what I say. Dr. Jess (00:54): So why don't you say that? Brandon (00:55): Because I feel stupid. Talking dirty, I feel dumb. Dr. Jess (01:01): Perfect setup for this episode. Brandon (01:03): Is it really? Dr. Jess (01:04): I think so, because we're going to be talking about dirty talk. And I think so many of us feel that way. But can I ask you something? In the heat of the moment, when you're like all riled up and you’re turned on and you know that I'm liking it and you're liking it, do you feel less silly? Brandon (01:17): No I still feel silly. Because I think, because I don't know what to say. Dr. Jess (01:21): But you do know what to say, because you just said it, in jest. Brandon (01:25): Yes but in the moment, it's like I'm drawing so many blanks. Dr. Jess (01:32): Well yeah anyhow. I was thinking that what I find is, that the more turned on I am, the less self conscious I am. If I'm in the heat of the moment, 'cause I don't worry about what's going on around me, I don't think about anybody else's needs. Brandon (01:47): But that's my problem. My problem is I'm constantly paying attention to everything that's happening around me. And I'm not immersed in the moment, even when I'm really into things. I'm still cognizant of how much noise is being made or you know just the environment and that really detracts from what's happening. Dr. Jess (02:07): So what do we do about that? I mean I know what we can do about that. What do you wanna do about that? Brandon (02:12): I look at it as my problem. I think I have to really get into the head space and also not care as much.

Jun 18

38 min 43 sec

Dr. Lexx is a phenomenal sex therapist, educator, and media consultant. The #CouplesClinician runs The Institute for Sexuality and Intimacy, LLC and is an Amazon best-selling author! She’s the coolest nerd you'll ever meet and she’s passionate about helping clients build, maintain, and perpetuate true intimacy with #shamefreesexed. This week, Dr. Lexx joins us to talk about adipositivity & enmeshment in relationships. She shares insights on how to recognize enmeshed dynamics and strategies for managing enmeshment. Follow Dr. Lexx's Instagram and Twitter . To learn more about the MUSICARES event Dr. Lexx will be moderating next week on the 16th, check out the information on her website at LexxSexDoc.com. Our wonderful partner Adam & Eve has extended their promo. Use code DRJESS to get 50% off almost any item including shipping PLUS some free goodies. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 217: Signs Of Enmeshment In Relationships (And what you can do about it) (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:17): Welcome, to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:24): Hey. We've been given away free vibes. So last week, we ran our first podcast contest, which is not as organized as it should have been. I learned my lesson. But we got a whole bunch of entries for these free vibrators from Romp Toys, and we've selected our winner. And I've got permission to share their name, so congratulations to Rebecca Bassett, who will be receiving in their mailbox a Romp Shine, which is one of those clitoral toys that fits around the head of the clit and uses pleasure air to create that fun suction/kissing/licking sensation. And Rebecca, you'll also be getting the Romp Jazz, which is a rabbit vibe, also by Romp. And I I love their packaging, love their branding, really cool new brands. So I guess, keep an eye on your mailbox. We have more good vibes and giveaways to come. I'm going to do the next one. On IG because it's just a little organized, a little bit easier for me to organize, so be sure to follow @sexwithdrjess on IG. And hey babe, should people follow your IG? Brandon (01:27): Ya, why not? @veritybrandonverity, come and see what I'm up to and what I'm commenting on. Dr. Jess (01:32): But it's not sex toys. Brandon (01:34): It is definitely not sex toys Dr. Jess (01:36): You can do a sex toy giveaway on yours if you want. Brandon (01:38): Sure. I'm sure that all my clients and friends would be wondering what I'm changing and doing, what I'm up to. Dr. Jess (01:45): All right so you'll give away sex toys on your channel and I'll give away a condo on mine. You donate the condo. I'll donate the sex toys. So of course if you are shopping for vibes, http://www.adamandeve.com has extended their promo for fifty percent off almost any item plus free shipping and some free goodies with code DRJESS so do checkout http://www.adamandeve.com. Well I want to dive right in because today, we’re going to be talking about enmeshment in relationships with a brilliant sex therapist.

Jun 11

37 min 6 sec

On this week's podcast, Jess & Brandon discuss sexual compatibility and share their personal experiences while addressing these Qs: How do know know if you’re sexually compatible? What can you do if you’re not sexually compatible? What are the keys to sexual compatibility? What’s the difference between desire and identity? Should you break up if you’re not sexually compatible? How can you find middle ground if you’re not feeling compatible? Jess & Brandon weigh in on these questions and much more! Plus we’ve got a sex toy give-away from Romp Toys, so be sure to tune in! And don't forget to check out our amazing sponsor Adam & Eve. They are offering 50% off almost any item including shipping with code DRJESS. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How Much Does Sexual Compatibility Matter? (00:05): You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:18): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co-host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half Dr. Jess. Jess (00:25): Hey. Brandon (00:26): How are you? Jess (00:27): I’m good. It's been a bit of a heavy week. We keep having heavy weeks don't we? Brandon (00:31): Seems to be the trend. Jess (00:33): Yeah, with the news, with some stuff going on in life. And yeah, I'm actually excited to be having this conversation, because it's just you and me. And I feel like it could be an opportunity to decompress a little where nobody else interrupts. No producers, no nobody today. And we're going to be talking about sexual compatibility, which I don't think we always use the word sexual compatibility but it is a huge issue that comes up in all of the messages I receive from people. Brandon (00:59): Don’t you think the people often reach out to you with sex problems and is it always a sex problem or is it a compatibility problem? Jess (01:08): I mean a lot of it does go down to compatibility, or I see it actually more as expectations when people reach out. Cause they're you know, upset that their partner won't do something or disappointed that their not on the same page, or frustrated that they're not having sex at all. I do think a lot of it has to do with expectations and boundaries, and the fact that honestly folks wait months and years and years and years and years and years before they reach out. And you know, now that I'm so far into this field right? It feels like I just started. But it's been over a decade of doing this full-time, actually it's been longer than a decade. It gets a little frustrating. Because you do want to help people, and also I don't wanna say people are too far gone, but one conversation or a series of conversations or one workshop or one book oftentimes can't resolve this pent up resentment and frustration and shame and hurt that has built up really. It’s over a decade in some cases. So yeah I mean with compatibility, it's really interesting, because people will often reach out and say “oh Dr. Jess, I tried this, I did what you said, I bought them this, I presented them your Ted talk ‘monogamish.’ And they're just not into it, like what do I do?” And the bottom line is if they're not into it they're not into it right? You're not,

Jun 4

38 min 46 sec

Backdoor play can be highly erotic, but it can also be uncomfortable if you don’t know how to prep and play. Surgeon and sexual health expert, Dr. Evan Goldstein, joins us to share his expertise so that you can enjoy even more pleasure — before, during and after anal sex. He answers a range of questions including: How can we make anal sex more pleasurable for first timers? What positions are best? Can anal sex stretch/damage the anus or rectum? What’s normal when it comes to poop? What is Future Method and how can it help with preparing for anal sex? What is anal training and why is it important? How can you facilitate relaxation before you start to play? What is the structure of the butt in terms of musculature and why is important to get to know your own butt? Follow Dr. Goldstein's Instagram and check out Bespoke Surgical to learn more about his practice. And a reminder, Masturbation May is almost over but our new partner femtasy.com - an all audio streaming platform is running a 99 cent special. Have a listen and let us know what you think! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Anal Play: Positions, Prep & Pleasure! (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:15): Welcome to the podcast. I'm your co-host Brandon Ware, with my always lovely other half Dr Jess, surrounded by a table full of dongs. Jess (00:26): Why are you laughing so hard? Brandon (00:28): Because I just said that we are surrounded by a massive table full of all sorts of sex toys. Like ridiculous amounts. Jess (00:35): Dongs on dongs dongs. Yeah I've been receiving massive shipments of sex toys over the last couple of weeks because of this new show I'm hosting with TSC and CityTV in Canada. So it's a shopping channel type show. TSC doesn't stand for The Shopping Channel. It stands for Today's Shopping Choice. But that's a whole other thing, but anyhow it's like the Home Shopping Network in the States but it's here in Canada and it's a sex toy show and it's Friday nights at midnight. And it's interestingly not on TSC , its on CityTV, which is a regular national network so folks can definitely check it out. But these boxes of sex toys I've been receiving, their massive. I can fit in these boxes. So my whole office, the floor, the desk, the chairs covered in sex toys from LoveHoney from Shots America from Lelo, from Womanizer, from Romp, Arcwave, from We-Vibe, from High on Love and then some. So there's kind of I feel like Ariel, is that her name? In the little mermaid. Where I'm like, “look at this stuff, isn't it neat? I got dildos and anal plugs aplenty.” Brandon (01:48): I like that's where your mind goes, to a Disney film. Only ours is about dongs and butt plugs and lube and all sorts of sex toys. Jess (01:55): But she says, ‘how many wonders can one cavern hold? Looking around here, she’s got everything.” Brandon (02:05): The lyrics here really jive with what you've got going on. Jess (02:08): Right? She had who’s its and what's its galore. She even had a thingamabobs. I feel like there should be a sex toy called a thingamabob. Anyhow, I wasn't intending to plug my new show, but do check it out. CityTV Fridays at midnight.

May 28

38 min 14 sec

Dr. Ali Mushtaq joins us to share his journey from a conservative upbringing to leather title holder and discusses how BDSM education can be more inclusive and justice-oriented. Some of the questions he covers includes: When and why is it important to talk about race in BDSM? How can we bring anti-oppression frameworks to kinky spaces? How do you walk to a partner about racial inequality? What is sexual racism and how does it cause harm — physically and emotionally? How do power dynamics develop in relation to erotic associations? To learn more about Dr. Ali’s work, visit GettingWolfie.com And check out our sponsor, OhMyG at IOBAToys.com and save 30% off with code DRJESS. Don't forget, for couples who are interested and would like to participate in a study with Couples and Sexual Health Lab, to check them out on Instagram for more information. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Kinky Sex, Race & Social Justice  (00:00): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Jess (00:19): Hey, hey, Jess O’Reilly, your friendly neighbourhood sexologist here with my always lovely other half Brandon Ware. Brandon (00:27): Got to be honest, I'm not sure what to say. Now I feel like that's my my only line. Jess (00:33) I am in a really good mood this week. Lots of good stuff going on, including a big celebration. We are celebrating twenty years together sometime this week. We don't know what day but sometime this week, we hit twenty years. Like it's just, it's such a crazy feeling every year at this time. I reflect on that week that we met that lucky for you, I hit on you because you never hit on me. And you had your mom's purple Ford Escort and we hung out the Escort and then basically moved in together the next day, but twenty years is just so mind blowing to me, 'cause I I feel like a kid. I don't know if it's because we don't have kids, but I feel like I'm still in my twenties, I don't know. Brandon (01:22) Time flies. I will say it's surprising to think that twenty years has whipped by. And what feels great for me is that I'm excited for what the next hopefully sixty years brings. But yeah, I looked at that photo that you post and I was contemplating my style selection twenty years ago. But I'm glad that you still decided to hit on me. Jess (01:48) You’re talking about the photo I posted on instagram. I was dressed as a cat, so I I had on cat ears. I think it was a halloween but it may not have been halloween. Yeah like thinking back to twenty years ago just feels so good, and it's interesting because one of the activities sometimes we do with couples, is we get them to retell the story of how they met, when they met, and what it felt like, and what they remember. And sometimes just reflecting upon the past kind of reinvigorates some of the passion chemicals that you experienced in the beginning. And I definitely feel that, like when we were in lying in bed the other night kind of just chatting about what it was like when we were younger and I I really don't feel older but I feel, I don't know, like life obviously isn't as, I don't know if I want to say chaotic as it was then. We used to stay up so late, we'd eat our dinner at the convenience store at like 3 ...

May 21

33 min 14 sec

To celebrate Masturbation May we’re joined by Dr. Megan Stubbs, author of Playing without a partner, a single’s guide to sex, dating, and happiness, who weighs in on these questions and more! What are the advantages of being single? Is it okay to keep going back to my ex? What does it mean if my partner of over a year hasn’t said I love you? Is autocunnlingus possible? What is edging? Why is everyone always complaining about dating and what can we do about it? How can you talk to a new partner about sensitive topics? What can you do if you’re gassy on a date? Megan's book discusses embracing and enjoying life as a single, while steering people away from the idea of what they think a single lifestyle should look like. Follow Megan on Twitter and her Instagram. Thanks to our wonderful sponsor Adam & Eve. Offering 50% off almost any item including shipping with code DRJESS. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript:  This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Solo Sex, Dating, Edging & More (00:00): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Jess (00:15): Hey, hey, Jessica O’Reilly, your friendly neighbourhood sexologist here, on my own without Brandon this week. But he will return for next week's episode, I promise. And I'm excited today. Because we're talking about auto cunnilingus, when to say I love you, sex with an ex, and most importantly, it is masturbation may so we will be talking about self pleasure with an old friend of mine Dr. Megan Stubbs, a sexologist and now an author who has a brand new book all about self love, and self pleasure, and navigating life on your own. It's on the shelves coming at you right about now. Before Megan joins me, I want to answer some of your super interesting questions you sent in, as well as say a big shoutout to our sponsors at AdamandEve.com. AdamandEve.com. They're offering fifty percent off almost any item plus free shipping and a host of other free gifts with code DRJESS — d. r. j. e. s. s. AdamandEve.com cells pretty much everything, from lube and massage oils to plugs and vibrators, dildos, restraints, and lingerie, and all of the fun stuff you can use to spice up the bedroom. So check them out — AdamandEve.com, and again use code Dr. Jess to save. Jess (01:46): Now I wanna start with the topic of auto cunnilingus, because the other day I got a couple of questions about auto cunnilingus from somebody who wanted to know whether or not it's possible and how to do it, and it's not something I've spent much time talking about or thinking about so I had to spend some time looking up what I could find, chatting with some clients, and basically auto cunnilingus refers to going down on yourself, so on your labia. So not on a penis, which might for some people potentially be easier to reach, still pretty unrealistic for most people, but auto cunnilingus, so going down on yourself, just in the end isn't realistic for most of us. If you are a really talented and probably professionally trained acrobat or contortionist, maybe it's doable. But in all of the spaces I've been in, where I see people doing all sorts of sexual things, like festivals and parties and gatherings, I've never seen it happen. It doesn't mean it's impossible.

May 14

37 min 56 sec

This week we explore surprising hot spots on the body including the Million Dollar Mark as well as a variety of erotic touch techniques from the Liquid Trace to the Breath Kiss. We also answer a listener question about whether or not to invite an ex to your wedding. Thanks to our amazing sponsor OMG by IOBA. I love this toy! Save 30% with code DRJESS And don’t forget to tune into Intimately You with Dr. Jess on CityTV Fridays at midnight starting May 14th -- presented by TSC! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 212: Exes, Erogenous Zones & Erotic Massage (00:05): You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:16): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:24): I'm not so lovely today. Brandon (00:27): I think you're lovely. And I'm not just saying that for brownie points. Dr. Jess (00:31): You're being sarcastic. Brandon (00:32): You’re hot. Dr. Jess (00:33): Oh, I’m nice to look at. That's not what I meant. I have a bad attitude. Brandon (00:37): You got the bad attitude all right. You got a bad-a-tude. Yeah you hot. Dr. Jess (00:41): It's been a day. Brandon (00:43): It has. Dr. Jess (00:44): I have to say. So I had such a wild day today, it was a bit of a rough one where I started with a live shoot, and our internet went down, and I pissed off the live audience, and a whole bunch of other things went down. Not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. But then I had therapy, so I just talked to my therapist Carla and I feel, I don't know like nine notches calmer. Brandon (01:03): That's great. Dr. Jess (01:04): Yeah. Brandon (01:05): I went upstairs and banged my head into the wall. Dr. Jess (01:08): It sounded like you were working out. Brandon (01:10): Yeah I did. I did some calisthenics. Dr. Jess (01:13): So you did your work out. I got my therapy. Are you feeling calmer? Brandon (01:16): I always feel calmer after I am physical. Dr. Jess (01:20): I thought you were gonna say you feel calmer after I go to therapy Brandon (01:25): I always feel better when you have therapy. No, I feel, I feel better all right. Dr. Jess (01:28): You've got your outlet. I've got mine. Now we're gonna be talking about erogenous zones today. Hopefully we'll get into some erotic massage techniques, we have a question about exes. Before we dive in, I want to say thank you to OhMyG, they are our sponsor today. This is a super quiet toy by Ioba that massages the G zone internally, with this come hither kind of swirling motion. It's really, really, cool. So if you picture a dildo with a kind of c-shape shaped curve to it, so that it gets really nicely into that G zone and at the tip of it, it has sort of an elongated pearl the size of a chocolate covered almond at the inner end, and it curves and pulses at varying speeds. I like the lowest speed, like slow and sensual. But you can turn it up if you like more intensity, and it's nice and quiet. It's made of body safe silicone and you can check it out on my reels on instagram if you wanna see how it works. Or you can head over to http://www.

May 7

35 min 21 sec

Dr. Shemeka Thorpe is a brilliant sex researcher, post-doctoral fellow and the founder of the Minority Sex Report. She joins us to talk about her latest research and we answer some of your burning questions including: I can't get into receiving oral sex. Is something wrong with me? What's the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality? How do I get over my partner's past? How can we improve sexual communication? How do we manage pain during sex? How do I advocate for myself with health professionals? Check out Dr. Shemeka Thorpe's work (including her database of BIPOC Pelvic Floor Therapists) & follow her on Instagram where she is #MakingResearchRelevant. And be sure to check out our new partner femtasy.com -- an all audio streaming platform that will help you to uncover new fantasies, explore latent desires and put you in the mood for pleasure. Whether you like romance, kink or something wild, Femtasy has you covered and they're running a 99 cent special for Masturbation May. Have a listen and let us know what you think! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns.   Episode 211: Sexual Communication & Research with Dr. Shemeka (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:14): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess Dr. Jess (00:21): Hey. Today we are answering a few questions from some of our college student listeners. Looking forward to those and we're going to be digging into the latest research about sexual pain and getting some advice on how to communicate our needs and improve our sex lives from Dr. Shemeka Thorpe. And I'm such a fan of her work. So yeah I'm really excited for this one. And I'm also really thrilled to announce a new partnership that we've just formed with a platform that I have been following and recommending and using personally for quite some time. They're called Femtasy. So Femtasy is an audio only streaming service with short erotic stories, and because my seduction style is audio, I love this concept right. No videos no photos, just narrated fantasies geared at women, but I think folks of all genders will actually be drawn in. It's designed to be a safe space, so the stories are ethically produced with their voice actors, they have over five hundred short stories, that for me are way more likely to get in the mood then visual depiction so. And this is great timing because we're coming up on masturbation may and they've actually dropped their prices really significantly to celebrate so full access is just ninety nine cents a month or ninety nine for the year, so if you do want to explore your fantasies or learn more about how to even figure out what your fantasies are, because so many people say they don't have fantasies. I think Femtasy is a great place to start. It's just one way to take time out for yourself and escape reality. And I've been listening to their audio for a while now and I'm actually going to see if I can play a sample in one of our upcoming episodes, because I think it will give you a taste. For in the meantime you can head over to their site and listen to some samples for free, so you can see if it's a great fit for you at htt...

Apr 30

37 min 2 sec

Got sexual and pelvic health questions? We’ve got answers! Dr. Rachel Gelman, Doctor of Physical Therapy and pelvic floor specialist returns to answer your questions related to sex, pleasure and pelvic floor functioning including: What is bumper sex? What can I do about leaking when I laugh? How do bowel movements affect pelvic floor function and sexual response? Why is anal pleasure so much hotter after my second child? What causes painful erections and how do you treat them? How do you promote stronger erections — for penises & clitorises? How does sitting at your desk all day affect sexual functioning? Why does oral feel so good after childbirth? How can changing the way you breathe promote pelvic floor function? Learn more about Dr. Rachel Gelman at www.pelvicwellpt.com and follow her on social: IG: @pelvichealthsf twitter: @rachelgdpt FB: @pelvicwellpt And if you're shopping for goodies, be sure to use code DRJESS at AdamAndEve.com to save 50% almost any single item + free shipping + bonus gifts! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 210: Erections, Orgasms & More! Advice from a Pelvic Floor Specialist  (00:02): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:10): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:17): Hey hey. Brandon (00:18): Hey, how’re you doing? Dr. Jess (00:20): Good good. Today we’re talking about some hot topics. We're talking stronger erections, oral sex, anal sex, and how it changes after childbirth. I don't know about that. But I want to hear about that. Leaking when you laugh. Do you leak when you laugh? Brandon (00:33): I do not leak when I laugh. Dr. Jess (00:36): Do you laugh? Brandon (00:37): I mean I'm hilarious, so I laugh all the time. Dr. Jess (00:39): You laugh at your own jokes. Brandon (00:40): I do. You know I woke up last night laughing to a dream. Dr. Jess (00:44): Do you not remember that I actually thought you were crying? So I was like, “baby it's okay” and you're like laughing. Brandon (00:50): I was laughing for real. I woke up. It was something, somebody farted in my dream. And I thought it was funny. Dr. Jess (00:54): Is that true? Brandon (00:55): Yeah that's the truth. I don't know who farted. But it was real funny. That's all it takes. That's all it takes to make me laugh. So if you ever see me chuckling, I'm probably thinking of somebody farting okay? Dr. Jess (01:05): So you don't leak when you laugh but you laugh in your sleep when someone farts? Brandon (01:09): Yes. Dr. Jess (01:10): Well that's funny because we're also going to be talking about bowel movements and constipation. We're going to be talking about bumper sex, the pussy pocket. Brandon (01:19): I'm thinking of bumper cars now. Dr. Jess (01:21): I just pictured people walking around with erections bumping each other. Brandon (01:25): I feel like that could be so painful so quickly. Dr. Jess (01:27): That's probably why it's so funny to me. Brandon (01:30): Maybe to you yeah. Dr. Jess (01:31):

Apr 22

41 min 17 sec

How do you keep things exciting in the midst of a repetitive routine? How can adults be more playful (because playfulness is associated with happier relationships & hotter sex)? What simple changes can you implement to make your daily interactions more fun, passionate and erotic -- even if you're super busy? You're not a light switch, so you likely can't get turned on in the blink of an eye. This week to celebrate our wedding anniversary, we share 20+ specific strategies and action items you can use to make your relationship more romantic, intimate and erotic. Thanks to the fabulous pearl vibrator, OhMyG, for their support of this episode. Save 30% with code DRJESS & be sure to check them out and watch my demo on IG here.         If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE #209: Eroticize Daily Interactions: 20 Actionable Tips For Busy Couples  (00:02): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:10): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I’m your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:18): Hey, hey. Brandon (00:19): How are you? Dr. Jess (00:20): I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good, I’m interested in this conversation for the two of us as well. We're going to be talking about how to make your daily interactions more erotic. What are you laughing about? Brandon (00:32): I’m immediately thinking about eating a banana. Dr. Jess (00:36): Oh my gosh, because in my presentations I always talk about how to eroticize daily interactions. Because you're not a light switch. You can't go from talking about your taxes and your work and your kids, whether or not your dog had a bowel movement on its last walk, to just flipping the switch and being “oh hi tear my clothes off.” And my joke is when I say to eroticize your daily interactions, I don't mean make everything annoyingly erotic right. I don't wanna be eating a banana and have Brandon look over and be like “Oh yeah babe. You eat that banana.” It’s really more about playfulness and flirtation and I don't know all these different ways to be erotic. It doesn't have to be super sexual or graphic so we're gonna be getting into that. I guess before we do, I should ask you, do you feel like our interactions are particularly erotic? Brandon (01:33): I don't think that I'm an erotic person. I feel very self-conscious whenever I'm trying to do something that I think is erotic, whether I've seen it on TV or a movie somewhere. I feel like a goof doing it, so when I see people who are genuinely erotic and they just exude the sex appeal, I'm like “good on you.” Because when I try that I feel like I look like a goof. Or I sound like a goof. Dr. Jess (02:05): No but you are naturally charming. Like flirtation is sort of charming. You may not be overtly sexual about it. I also wonder if you haven't had to be because people like the way you look so much. Brandon (02:15): Well maybe, I don't know. Dr. Jess (02:28): I don't think that's entirely true. But I would say that we've been getting along really well. Brandon (02:33): I would agree. Dr. Jess (02:35): I feel like we laugh a lot and we're playful. Brandon (02:37):

Apr 16

42 min 10 sec

What are the causes of pain postpartum? How can you soothe your own pain and what exercises and massage techniques can help? What does self massage entail — both directly and indirectly? And how do you assess readiness for sex postpartum? How does a Caesarian birth affect sexual functioning? Perinatal Therapist, Janette Yee, joins us to answer these questions and more. Janette's Caesarean Birth Selfcare course is now available for sign up at any time. Previously the four lessons were taught live; now they're available pre-recorded, along with over 20 how-to videos illustrating self-massage techniques and exercises. Cost: $199 Introductory bonus: access to 6 months of weekly live online group classes with Janette every Wednesday at 1pm EST. She teaches a mini-lesson, runs a mini-workout, and answers questions. All recorded and available to all students within 24 hours. (Value: $2600) Follow Janette on Instagram & LinkedIn. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast is sponsored by Adam & Eve. Use code DRJESS to save 50% off 1 item + bonus goodies!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Sex After Childbirth: Techniques & Strategies From a Perinatal Therapist 00:00:05 - 00:05:15 You're listening to the sex with dr. Jess podcast sex and relationship advice you can you off tonight? Hey, hey, this is Brandon. We're ready to talk sex and relationships with dr. Yes. How's it going? I like that voice now. I just want to shut it off just you and me. Let's just go. Let's get out of here sexy time. Yeah, not if you call it sexy time game. Well, the mood is over. So back to the show. We actually have a new retail partner for our podcast and they are offering a bunch of free stuff to our listeners as well as some deep discounts. So most folks have probably heard of Adam and Eve and they sell everything from lingerie Vibes two rings to toys to King Kong. Have and with code. Dr. Jess Jess, you get 50% off one item plus a bunch of free gifts. So they're giving you six free movies free shipping and three extra treats you can use to spice things up in bed. So please do go check out your options and use code d r j e s s office to save 50% off your one item and get your bonus goodies at Adam and Eve, It can be sexy time right now for everybody. This is why I'm still here. Well, at least I'm having a good time. You know, sometimes we in life we run behind and twenty Twenty-One has been a year for me off of just falling behind. So today we're actually going to Aaron interview that we recorded a few months ago, and we had intended to release it earlier, but you know, Bob If circumstances got in the way and we didn't get to and this was such an interesting interview for me because it's all new stuff related to postpartum Wellness bought a pleasure and overall health that relates to all of us not just people who are postpartum and our guest Jeanette. She is passionate perinatal therapist a mother of two months or more competitive Runner and rugby player and she's working really hard to improve perinatal health care and this really includes quality of life issues around sexual relationships in April is actually cesarean birth awareness month. So our delay makes for good timing. So without further Ado,

Apr 9

41 min 44 sec

A listener shares their story and feelings after having had cheated on their long-term partner. They ask for help managing the guilt and shame and Jess & Brandon weigh in on the topic with a discussion of: Whether or not to tell your partner about an affair Why talking about cheating can be helpful in all relationships How to talk about affairs in the hypothetical to improve understanding in relationships How the language of confession can feel burdensome How to manage feelings of guilt How to forgive yourself How to work through feelings of shame How to practice self-compassion How to learn from previous regrets Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How to Forgive Yourself After Youve Cheated 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr jasser. Podcast co host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half dr jess. Hey hey how's it going and good today we're gonna be we're gonna be talking about something serious going to be talking about how to get over an affair. I look forward to your answers. I wanna know what you think. I think this is an important conversation for everyone in a relationship. But we're actually going to be talking about it from the perspective of the cheater Interesting how to move through the guilt and the shame so before we get to the question that somebody sent in one a shout out our sponsor. Let's get checked dot com. They offer all sorts of home wellness and health tests including s. t. is and. I was actually looking at some research out of canada this morning by going to try and get this right. The sex information and education council of canada came out with data showing that young people are reporting lower access to sexual health and reproductive health services since the onset of the pandemic make sense when you think about them perhaps not being on campus and having access to different sexual health counseling And free hall centers especially when we think about so. Many people may be living at home. And maybe they need their parents to drive them someplace. And don't wanna ask so. This is an option for folks. Let's get checked. You receive a box at kit and you take your sample by yourself. At home you mail it in and they provide your results securely online anna matter of days so folks please do check it out. Let's get checked dot com and please please use code dr jess to save and also so that they know you heard about it here. All right so. I'm going to read out the question that i received about how to get over the guilt and shame and other associated feelings of cheating because this is a tough one. I wanted to actually spend some time on it with you. So this person writes in and says i've been in a serious relationship for almost twelve years. We've been cohabitating for eleven years during our ninth year together. I had an affair after sleeping with the other person for the second time i felt tremendous guilt and i cut off all ties. Haven't told my partner. And at this point i don't think it's worth it.

Apr 2

34 min 50 sec

Adam Maurer joins us to crush on Brandon, sass Jess (with love) and answer your sex questions including: How do I pick between partners — a safe partner versus one with whom the sex is hotter? How do I deal with the fact that I love my boyfriend, but I’m no longer find him physically appealing? How can fetishes reduce stress and cultivate connection? What can we do to maintain attraction over time? What can we do to make the relationship run more smoothly? How can individual's growth potentially threaten a relationship? How do trauma responses affect partner and relationship decisions? How do I deal with a dental visit knowing that I have a dental fetish? Follow Adam on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Fetishes as Healing & How to Build Attraction 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess. How's it going. i'm excited. What four going to be talking to my friend and we. We need to dive right in. Because i know they have a lot to say so much to say you know what we should really spent some time catching up on our frisbee skills with adam. I feel as though you and our guests are gonna gonna pick on me today. I'm very much looking for this conversation before we welcome them. I wanna give a quick shout to. Let's get checked folks if you have any health tests that are overdue or do anything. From s t is to hormones to cholesterol to diabetes to lyme disease to seal eac. It is covered by. Let's get checked. They send you the test. You take your own sample you mail it in and you check your results securely online. It's let's get checked dot com. Please use code doctor jess to save at checkout and also to let them know that you heard about it here during a pandemic can't be a better time than doing your own testing at home. You know if. I don't have to leave my house i won't. That is the absolute truth unless it's to go on a plane unless it's gonna play. I want my haircut here. My teeth cleaned here also. So let's get checked using her own code. I have have actually alright without further ado. Let's dive right in. Adam is a gender queer straight friendly therapist. From austin texas she is a defender of pleasure and a slayer of shame bitch who loves to dish out wisdom on sex love and mental health here with us. Today is the fabulous miss adam. Our how you doing. I'm so good. I was just thinking man. You having on once and shame on me for tricking you into that without you to what you're getting into and so you have all the troubles on you well. Last time you complained. That brand wasn't here. And so i was a little late to the meeting today. Actually i wasn't late. You both were early. And i walked in and you were you were chatting with one. Another unsupervised discussing the terms of our recent pro frisbee sponsorship agreements. And how amazing they are because as everybody knows just is a frisbee fiend and call it desk tonette just keeping up to...

Mar 25

48 min 7 sec

The brilliant Luna Matatas joins us to answer your sex and pleasure questions including: How do you stimulate the prostate? What are the best anal toys for beginners? What are lactation fetishes? Does size matter? How do I get over body image issues before I go to a play party? How can I bring up fetishes to a partner? How can we normalize anal play and pegging? How can I pleasure my partner externally? Follow Luna on Facebook, Twitter, Youtube & Instagram. Be sure to listen to The Plug Podcast with Luna Matatas. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. And drawing from this podcast, be sure to check out Womanizer's sale on their Starlet & Pro.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Fetishes, Butt Play & Does Size Matter? 00:00:05 - 00:05:01 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess hello brandon. Whoa hello there. I'm why did you say like. I don't know i like. I like saying your name brandon brandon. Because i don't really call you britain in real life you do not call you. Hey you know. And i respond. I call you babe. Yaeko call you babe to let's it. It's easy so we never forget each other's names we never screwed up. Oh i'm gonna mood today. I'm so excited because one of my best. Tease is about to join us in just a minute. She's the best in the business. She is funny and punny and creative and empathetic and full of the best sex ed info. We are talking about sex and pleasure educator luna matas who teaches people how to build better relationships to their bodies helps people to practice empathy with their partners in terms of insecurities needs and really encourages people to get curious about all things erotic and all of her work is trauma and equity informed. She talks about pleasure. Topics like anal play and feminine dominance and threesomes and unicorns and she hosts a podcast. Herself called the plug. And we're going to be chatting with luna about body image and pegging and normalizing anal play. And i we have a question about a small penis some fetishes and more so before luna joins us. It is great. I mean she's just fantastic confer excited to. I know i love chatting with her. And i chat with almost every day offline now. I guess it's online technically. Everything's online now. But i wanted to just draw attention to the fact that my friends at womanizer are having a sale right now. I just noticed on the starlet and pro and if you're not familiar with womanizer toys who they are among my personal favourite they are. This is a brand that is really an industry disrupter in that they patented created brand new technology a few years ago that never existed in sex toys before they hit the scene and they call it. Pleasure air so pleasure. Air technologies technology is one of the most direct paths to orgasms for so many people who have clitorises and i would describe this. Sensations as sort of a cross between pulsing inviting and sucking and kissing. And it's all around the sensitive head of the clitoris. So it's kind of a tiny little opening that fits around the head of your quit.

Mar 19

46 min 20 sec

Dr. Shari Nicole, Psychologist and Key Consultant of Everyday Psychology, joins us to talk about the importance and challenge of adult friendships. We discuss cutoff culture, attachments styles, boosting confidence and more including answers to these common questions: How many friends do most people have? How do childhood experiences affect adult friendships? How do you know if a friendship is worth saving? How do you know that it’s time to break up with a friend? How do you go about breaking up with a friend? How do friendships affect intimate relationships? How do friendships differ according to gender? How can you be more confident in your friendships? Follow Dr. Shari on Instagram and Facebook. Be sure to check out her podcast 3 Psychs and a Mic. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How to Break Up With A Friend 00:00:05 - 00:05:03 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess how are you. I'm good man. You know. I'm excited for today. Because i have a lot to learn about this topic we are going to be talking about friendship and it is such an important topic because friendship's just like intimate relationships can have such a significant effect on your mental health. You're physical health happiness life. Ill meant and as i started digging into the research while one thing i found is that social isolation has actually increased over the last few decades in north america. And i'm talking far prior to covid. And i was looking at the two thousand six study found that the number of friends people feel they can discuss important matters with reduce to well. There's two in there. That's pretty good. Yeah so it fell from two point nine four so almost three in one thousand nine hundred five to two point. Zero eight thousand four. I'm sorry but that's all right is does does your partner. If you're in a relationship does your partner count as a friend to the in this study. Do you know that's a great question. I'm not sure. Because i feel like i don't know that i would have two point nine or three friends with whom i would feel comfortable discussing serious matters. I think i can think of one. Maybe two depending on the topic. But if if you're not in that mix it's it's now you know you can't tell mysterious That's interesting because i start to think about my numbers. And how do i say this. I'm not sure it's particularly relevant. How many there are right. I don't know that it's that. I need eight versus four. Or you know. It's so easy to say like when i was counting. You know as i do this. I have you and there are four others in my life whom i feel. I can approach with really serious stuff. There are probably actually more than that. But there's four that i'm kind of close with and i don't wanna look at this and say oh i'm above the two point zero eight. I think really what matters is the quality of the relationship as opposed to the number of friends. But as i did dig into the research.

Mar 12

41 min 33 sec

Thanks to medical research and breakthroughs, we now have the tools to end the HIV epidemic. Unfortunately, we’re still a long way off on account of stigma, misinformation and a lack of awareness with regard to prevention options. So it’s essential that we talk about it. Brad McElya, joins us to take a deeper dive into the topic of HIV and answers your questions including: How have approaches to HIV shifted since the 80s? Is HIV transmission possible if you have an undetectable viral load? What is PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and how does it work to prevent transmission? Who should consider PrEP? Why is HIV still an epidemic when we have the tools to eradicate it? How do we chip away at the stigma that hinders testing, prevention and treatment? How can we normalize conversations about HIV and how can your local pharmacist help? We also discuss the new ArcWave Ion and Brandon provides a very personal and detailed review of his first time using this stroker + pleasure-air technology. You don’t want to miss it! Brad is Walgreens' Director of Specialty Health Solutions. Walgreens pharmacists receive specialized training in confidential and compassionate HIV care. Learn more at Walgreens.com/prep or visit your local Walgreens and request a consult in a private room. And you can chat online 24/7 with a pharmacist here. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. What You Dont Know About HIV 00:00:05 - 00:05:11 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess how are you. I'm good. i'm so happy to have you back. Because i was on on my own last week and i promised everyone that brand would be back. And that i'd hand you the reins to talk about touching yourself. Well i'm glad and i was also wondering. Where was i last week when i was busy with work and i am sorry that i missed it. I love these podcasts. I love learning and listening and asking questions. I know i know well today. I'm going to be handing you the reins To talk about your with the arc wave but we're also going to be talking about the hiv epidemic and how it can be a radical added. We have the tools to eradicate it. And i was thinking about. You know when we look back to the eighties there was so much fear around hiv aids and so much misinformation. That was fueled by but also reinforcing of you know homophobia and racism and hiv. I remember when i studied social movements in school Hiv was such an important piece of you know so many social uprisings at the time and we had groups like aids action now and i remember studying it and then now it seems as though it's just kind of taken a backseat in part. Because the fear isn't as strong which is a good thing. We now know that you know an hiv diagnosis is not a death sentence which we saw it as back. Then we knew. And we know that you can live a long healthy high-quality life being hiv positive. Especially if you have access to resources like medications and we know that quality of life is really now the focus of hiv care but we also know that like all medical care.

Mar 5

48 min 3 sec

How are trauma and liberation linked? How does trauma show up in the body? And how can you begin to heal? How does trauma play out in sex and relationships? How can you support a partner who has experienced sexual trauma? How do you talk to a new partner if you’re a survivor of sexual assault? How can therapists improve the way they support clients and what can clients ask of therapists to improve their experience in therapy? Therapist Rafaella Smith-Fiallo of Healing Exchange & Afrosexology joins us to share her perspective, expertise and advice. She explores pleasure politics, liberation psychology, social justice, and embodiment as approaches and tools for healing. Follow Rafaella on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Based on the discussion in this podcast, check out the latest events from Afrosexology here. Click here to learn more about Healing for Bibliophiles. Also, consider the You For You Retreat in October 2021, I hope to see you there! Please see here for a rough version of this transcript.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Trauma Responses in Sex & Relationships 00:00:05 - 00:05:00 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey i'm on my own. Today's songs brandon because he got tied up with something big at his work. Bud i am thrilled to get the chance to chat with and interview. Rafael follow of healing exchange. She is a brilliant therapist specializing in relationships sacks trauma she is also the co creator of a powerhouse in our industry. Afra- sexology doing incredible work. That is pleasure centered sex positive and really centers the sexual liberation of black folks but before raffaela joins us. I i want to quickly talk about our leaders. Partnership with walgreens because this partnership is intended to raise awareness around hiv prevention including access to prep which is pre exposure prophylaxis. It's a daily pill to prevent hiv transmission and it is over ninety nine percent effective at preventing transmission via sexual activities. So your are your local walgreens. Pharmacist can help to ensure that you access it at no cost possibly through the ready set prep program and you can just walk into a store to your walgreens and asked to talk to the pharmacist in pharmacist in private. You don't have to give any more information than that or you can learn more at walgreens dot com slash prep. That's walgreens dot com slash p. r. e. p. Now i also wanna talk about another project. I'm working on called the you for you retreat and. I'm really excited for this. I know we've all obviously pulled back from retreats and in person events and travel for the last year. But i'm optimistic that you know with the current vaccination plan hopefully will be able to travel again at the end of twenty twenty one and so i'm going to be part of a retreat at temptation. Resort in october and temptation is actually topless. Optional resort with a. It's very cool very modern and it's got a really definitely an erotic vibe at. It's actually the sister resort to desire resorts which i talk about. Autumn and this retreat is the retreat. I'm working with is specifically for women but people of all genders will be there are many people will bring their partners...

Feb 26

44 min

The unapologetic sexologist, Michelle Hope, joins us to chat about HIV stigma, forced sterilization, COMMUNITYx, reproductive justice and more. We also address listener questions about anal sex, positions for a tilted cervix and loss of libido. Follow Michelle on Instagram, Twitter & Facebook. The COMMUNITYx App is the premier Social Network for Social Good. Built by changemakers, for changemakers, COMMUNITYx puts organizing and connecting around vital issues at the forefront, without the distractions of other social platforms. The App allows like-minded people from around the world to connect and mobilize in an effort to address some of society's most pressing social issues, allowing members to create a variety of calls-to-action all in one place. Founded in 2019, by Chloe Cheyenne, since its launch, Chloë and COMMUNITYx have earned major accolades such as being recognized by Forbes 30 Under 30 as the #1 Startup of The Year and is also a Techstars Portfolio Company.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE #201: Reproductive Justice: Power, Positions & Pleasure  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:18): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, who’s celebrating her birthday week. Dr. Jess (00:27): Yeah it’s my birthday week but you know we're on what, day twelve of our fourteen day quarantine right now? This is a condition of our travel back home, that we can't go outside or let anyone in or even meet anyone outside. Brandon (00:43): It's amazing how I miss walking in the really cold weather. Dr. Jess (00:47): I've never wanted to go out in winter so badly. Brandon (00:50): The other day I was like, I wish I could put it in the garbage. Dr. Jess (00:53): That's the exciting point. So I guess we'll be celebrating my birthday with takeout. And maybe my mom will come by and wave from the door, even though it's what, negative twelve degrees celsius out there? Brandon (01:05): I think that's without the wind chill. We talk about the wind chill and the humidity all the time. Dr. Jess (01:09): And it was your birthday last week. Brandon (01:11): It was. Dr. Jess (01:12): You turned… Brandon (01:14): forty three. Dr. Jess (01:15): I swear to god, Brandon, so I met you when you were what, twenty three? Brandon (01:19): Yes. We moved in together when I was twenty three. Dr. Jess (01:24): It kind of baffles my mind. I don't know like, it just, I can't imagine you as forty-three year old. Brandon (01:31): Why? I hope you can envision me as sixty three or even eighty three. Dr. Jess (01:34): I don't know you still look, you look young to me now. I mean everybody says that, but no really like, I don't know. I don't see a big difference between forty three year old Brandon and twenty-three-year-old Brandon when I look at you guess. Because I see you every day. Brandon (01:47): I think the changes are felt internally. It's like a few extra aches and pains, i don’t want to tell you how difficult it was to get out of bed yesterday or something like that. So I'm trying to keep those personally,

Feb 19

39 min 55 sec

This week Jess and Brandon discuss a new project with Walgreens related to PrEP, medication that reduces the sexual transmission of HIV by over 99%. They discuss Jess’ early work in sex education and answer listener questions including: How can I initiate sex with confidence? How do you flirt? What are the “apology languages”? How do you keep your cool during conflict? How can I get my partner to be more dominant in bed? To learn more about Walgreens PrEP, click here. Rough transcript of this podcast below: Brandon: Welcome! Hope everyone is well. Jess: I’m really excited because I’m swamped this week and I like the buzz. I have lots going on with V-Day on the horizon and a big announcement as well, so I’ll start with that topic, as it relates to HIV prevention and involves a new partner and I really think that raising awareness of this topic can make a big difference because While rates of HIV in the U.S. have continued to decrease, but the epidemic is far from over. During the COVID-19 pandemic, many people have faced barriers to HIV testing, prevention and treatment. Obviously sexual health and pleasure intersect with overall health and I really want to increase conversations and understanding when it comes to prevention of HIV through the use of tools like PrEP, or Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. This is why why I am excited to be working with Walgreens to encourage anyone at risk for HIV to reach out to their local Walgreens pharmacist to discuss their options. Walgreens pharmacists are specially trained to offer compassionate, confidential HIV care, including prevention options such as medication counseling and how to qualify for free programs like Ready, Set, PrEP, a nationwide effort led by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, which provides PrEP medications at no cost to those who qualify. These confidential discussions with a pharmacist can take place in private rooms in stores, by phone and online via Pharmacy Chat. To learn more, visit walgreens.com slash prep. That’s walgreens.com slash P-R-E-P.” Now most people probably don’t know that I started my career in sexuality working in HIV. My focus when I was doing research in teacher training involved three topics: healthy relationships, HIV/AIDS and sexual pleasure, because these were the topics that Toronto teens identified as their top priorities via the Toronto Teen Survey, which was a partnership research project between three universities that spoke with teens who wouldn’t normally be included in research — so newcomer teens, more queer students, and other students forced to the margins. And when or while I completed by research, I started working freelance with some AIDS service organizations as a trainer, as a speaker and I worked with the ASO up in Fort Mac Alberta to help launch a sexual health & STI counselling line in a region that was hit hard in terms of HIV and STI rates on account of the way the oil economy had affected population movement and growth. The ED of that ASO, Daven Seebaran really focused on sexuality as a part of the HIV discussion — this was over a decade ago and he really realized that you can’t talk about HIV prevention without also talking about sex — pleasure, options, activity, behaviour and not just condom use. He was young at the time and way ahead of his time. And he gave me so many opportunities in this field at a time when many people in public health still refused to talk about sex and definitely were leaving pleasure out of the equation. Back then, PrEP was in its infancy and was, in fact, still in clinical trials, but fast forward a decade plus and we’re in a very different situation now. PrEP, or pre-exposure prophylaxis, is a daily pill that can reduce the risk of sexually transmitted HIV by about 99% when used consistently. You may have heard of the brand names for PrEP. Truvada was the first drug approved for use as PrEP for both men and women by the Food &...

Feb 12

43 min 54 sec

Kevin Patterson & Dr. Liz Powell join us to talk about their new course, Unf*ck Your Polyamory Pro — for both individuals, couples, groups and professionals. They discuss shame, stigma, stereotypes, metamours, toxic monogamy, hierarchies, compersion and lessons that we can all learn from — regardless of whether we consider ourselves monogamous, ethically non-monogamous or otherwise inclined. Follow Dr. Liz on Twitter & Instagram. Follow Kevin on Instagram, Facebook & Twitter. To learn more about the We-Vibe Tango X that Jess referenced in this episode, click here. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 199: Polyamory, Toxic Monogamy, & Ethical Non-Monogamy: What Therapists & Practitioners Need to Know (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:18): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr Jess. Dr. Jess (00:25): Hi, hi. Brandon (00:26): Hello. Dr. Jess (00:27): How you feeling today? Brandon (00:30): I'm feeling pretty good, you? Dr. Jess (00:31): I'm good. I woke up in a bad mood. But I'm feeling much better. I’ve have had really wild morning, some exciting meetings, learning about some new topics. And I'm really looking forward to today's topic here on polyamory, and toxic monogamy, and compersion and a whole bunch of other hot topics. Brandon (00:51): Should be a great conversation. I'm looking forward to it. Dr. Jess (00:54): Yes, before we dive in. I want to thank http://www.letsgetchecked.com for their ongoing support of our program. Check them out http://www.letsgetchecked.com for all your at home health testing needs, and use code DRJESS to save. And I thought I’d mention something. My friends over at We Vibe, which is really my favourite sex toy brand honestly. I've been working with them forever. I've been using them forever. And my favourite toy is called the Touch. I've had my Touch forever. It sort of looks like a flat thick purple tongue. Is that a good way to describe it? Brandon (01:27): Yeah I would say so. Dr. Jess (01:29): Or like a skinny computer mouse. Brandon (01:32): Yes both of those. Dr. Jess (01:34): I've been pulled over by TSA, and they've asked what's in the bag. They’re like “are those computer mice.” Cause I always have a bunch of them. I’m like not exactly. I always just tell them they’re sex toys and they let me go on my merry ways, because they don't want to go into my suitcase. Brandon (01:47): That’s one that I've used on the plane, as a neck massager. Dr. Jess (01:51): It might have been. You've also used the Wish, the blue one. Brandon (01:56): They all work. Dr. Jess (01:58): Anyhow. We Vibe has come out with a new and improved TouchX, as well as their new Tango. And I'm super excited because these are kind of our old stalwarts. These are the toys that I've had in my personal kit for so long. And now they've been upgraded and yeah, I'm just really excited to try them. I'm not gonna lie and say I've tried them yet. Because I'm still in Jamaica.

Feb 5

43 min 35 sec

Courtney Brame founded Something Positive for Positive People after his own herpes diagnosis and through his non-profit and podcast, he shares real stories and resources for people with positive STI diagnoses. He joins us to discuss shame, stigma, dating, suicide prevention and more including: How he felt when he was first diagnosed How he navigated the dating world post-diagnosis How people respond when he shares his positive status How to disclose to a new partner How herpes serves as a compass for the body and self-care The costs of herpes jokes How we can reduce the shame and stigma How to build a support system after a diagnosis Check out the Something Positive for Positive People Podcast. Follow Courtney on Facebook, Instagram & Twitter. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 198: Dating with Herpes: Disclosure, Stigma & Healing (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (0:18): Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half, Dr Jess. Dr. Jess (0:26): Feeling somewhat lovely this morning. I feel like we're getting into our 2021 groove. And you know if we go back to the Dionne Roberts podcast on rest, I've been getting more rest and sleep than I ever have in my life. I think I'm growing. I think I'm an inch taller. Brandon (0:41): I'm gonna attribute it in all seriousness to shutting my phone off earlier, making that commitment. And I've been trying to stick to it in 2021. I mean we're only a short time into that, but having that alarm set on my phone or whatever the setting is, to shut off my phone, is really I think helping me sleep. Dr. Jess (01:01): So we're getting more sleep, but my sleeps are a little bit tormented. I feel like my body is still adjusting to this whole eight hours plus sleep, like I think my body was more used to five and now it's like after five hours, even though we're going to bed earlier, I'm waking up. But I think it's getting us into a groove. I don't know it feels good in the body. Brandon (01:21): I agree. It feels good. Almost embarrassed to admit how early we have gone to bed some nights Dr. Jess (01:25): Don't tell the people. Brandon (01:27): We used to have dinner later. Dr. Jess (01:29): We used to go to remember, we used to make fun of the people who went to the club before eleven when we were young? Brandon (01:35): You're going to the club at at ten thirty, eleven? What’s wrong with you? Dr. Jess (01:40): Now, we’re fast asleep, fourth cycle of REM. I don’t know how that works, so don’t quote me on that. Today, we are going to be chatting with an old friend of the podcast who is really doing incredible work in this field via his nonprofit organization, "Something Positive for Positive People". And so he helps to provide therapy and support to folks who are diagnosed with herpes, and other STIs. And through his podcast, he shares his own story of diagnosis and the stories of other people who are diagnosed. And if you tune in or follow Courtney, his name's Courtney Brame,

Jan 29

45 min 50 sec

Psychotherapist, Farzana Doctor, joins us to discuss her latest novel, Seven. She shares her own story as a survivor and an activist and discusses the role the body can play in healing. She also sheds light on the practice of female genital mutilation and cutting, which occurs in all corners of the globe, including North America. We discuss somatic therapy, labiaplasty, and the perils of white saviorism as well as her journey of healing post trauma. Follow Farzana on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. Use code DOCTOR25 for 25% off Seven at Dundurn Publishers! This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 197: Somatic Therapy, Sexual Healing & FGMC (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Dr. Jess (0:18): Hey hey. Brandon how you doing today? Brandon (0:20): I'm doing pretty good. How are you? Dr. Jess (0:22): I'm good. I saw that you had a big day today. Brandon (0:26): I did, big morning. Dr. Jess (0:28): You had your first friend date since like, their first virtual friend date, since the onset of COVID. We're like ten months in and you told me you were going to have coffee with a friend online and I was like, “Oh my god. That's so exciting.” And I mean I know we talk about relationships. But I wonder if we should spend some more time talking about friendships. Brandon (0:52): Yeah I had a great, I mean just caught up with a friend over coffee. And like you said it was the first time since this began that I haven’t kind of jumped in on your group of friends to have some connection. So there's this friend of mine who we would meet once every week or two, have coffee, catch up, and honestly just talk. And not like surface, superficial conversations but deeper conversations. We've shed some tears together. When our dog passed away he was one of the few people that I shared the story with. And it was really hard for me and honestly I hope he doesn't mind me saying this but we were both like in tears, at this coffee shop which was a little different. Dr. Jess (01:37): So that was a few years ago. Darkhorse, in the Canary District district right? Brandon (01:43): Yeah coming up on about two years ago that happened. And since then we've shared in other things that have been going on in my life, and things that were going on in his life, and it doesn't always get deep, but it's nice to have a friend where you can dig a little bit deeper and you can open up because it's not something that I felt like I grew up with. I had a lot of friends that we that we really shared, I guess intimately about, like things of it. Dr. Jess (02:09): Yeah and I bring it up because you know, I'm super social and you tend to kind of pop in and pop out. And I think sometimes and correct me if I'm wrong, my friend group fills your social cup right? Like you kinda just come and hang with us for a little bit. Then you pull a Brandon and leave us. But I guess during these different times where I'm not seeing any of my friends right now, we are with two of my cousins here, that's who we're living with actually. They're moving out though tomorrow,

Jan 22

44 min 21 sec

This week we explore the research that connects sleep and rest with sex and relationships. Dionne Roberts joins us as we discuss: How your sleep affects your connection and conflict How Yoga Nidra can be used to address sleep deprivation and improve relationships Sound baths How to reduce stress in the name of overall health and happier relationships How to let go of the mindsets that cause stress and hinder relaxation Follow Dionne on Instagram, Facebook & Twitter. It's not too late to sign up for her Rest & Digest Virtual Retreat happening today! Check out her Youtube channel, and let her walk you through one of her Yoga Nidra practices below! This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 196: Yoga Nidra, Rest & Sleep Habits: How They Affect Sex & Relationships (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (0:19): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess Podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware, here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (0:26): Hello, how did you sleep last night? That's what's on my mind. How'd you sleep? Brandon (0:30): That’s what’s on your mind. I slept okay. Wasn't bad, had a hard time falling asleep. But once I'm asleep I'm usually out for the count. Dr. Jess (0:38): Except when I wake you up in the night. Brandon (0:40): Except when you wake me up, and my default has been to start to rub your hand before I fall back asleep. Dr. Jess (0:46): I think you just hold it. Brandon (0:49): What do you know? You don't even know anyways, you’re probably asleep. Dr. Jess (0:52): I'm feeling actually a little bit better today. My sleep has been so poor lately. With everything that's been going on, you know my schedule has been turned upside down. I don't know if we talked about the fact that we've been going to bed so early and I've been waking up by five. Brandon (1:10): We go to bed embarrassingly early, the last six weeks. Dr. Jess (1:13): But it's so weird because my whole life I've been a night owl, like my ideal would be to stay up 'til about 2:30 every night and get up by 6. Brandon (1:23): Really, 2:30? I'd be asleep by 12, 12:30, and I'd like to get up around the same, around 6. Dr. Jess (1:32): Yeah but I can't do that. I mean it's not enough sleep. I did it for so many years, and it's not healthy and that's what we're going to be talking about today. About how important feeling rested and getting a good night's sleep is to overall health and wellbeing, but also to relationships and to your sex life. So before we dive into that. I want to say thank you to “Let’s Get Checked”, check them out if you are looking to do any medical health testing at home, http://www.letsgetchecked.com. Use the code DRJESS, you can get tested for everything from hormones to STIs and a whole bunch of other tests, so do check them out. And I also wanted to shout out an event I’m pretty excited for next week, because I'm working with a brand that I've been using personally for a long time and this brand is Consonant. So Consonant was introduced to me by my mom,

Jan 15

44 min 6 sec

How does a survival mindset affect sexuality? How does history and oppression shape sexuality for Black women? How do you learn to love your body and give yourself permission to embrace pleasure? How do you really fall in love with yourself? How does code switching affect sex and relationships? How do we unlearn embedded messages that hold us back in life and in love? Community Psychologist and Sexologist, Author and Professor Dr. Hareder McDowell joins us to share her experience and insights. Follow Dr. McDowell on Facebook and Instagram. Follow P.R.E.T.T.Y. INC. on Instagram and Twitter. And if you need to do some belated holiday gift shopping, use code DRJESS for a small discount on Womanizer products! This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 195: Overcome Shame & Oppression in the Name of Self-Love & Pleasure (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:18): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here, with my lovely other half, the doctor Jess. Dr. Jess (00:25): Happy, happy new year. Brandon (00:28): Yeah, happy new year. Do you feel any different? Dr. Jess (00:31): Well as you know Brandon, and other folks may not know, we didn't exactly ring out or ring in the new year because we were dealing with a family situation with somebody being diagnosed positive with COVID, so we had a nice quiet new year, Chinese food and champagne. You know I don't really like anything more than that. Just the two of us and my one uncle, Dee, from a distance, shout out to Uncle Dee, totally taking care of us in the middle of this family, I don't wanna say crisis, but hiccup for sure. And it's the start of 2021. I'm definitely excited for it. It's interesting if I were to get into it, I didn't get all the things done I had wanted to complete in 2020. And I was talking to my therapist today, and her big question is why? Like, why do you need to do these things? Why is it so important? Because I feel so torn between wanting to do them but also not wanting to do the work you know? Brandon (01:31): You just want it to magically happen? Dr. Jess (01:34): Not so much that, because I love the work. But this I think feeling torn between what you feel you should do and what you really enjoy doing. And one of the questions she posed to me had to do with like, “why? What’s your vision?" Right? “What is your mission? What is your purpose?” She said, “Avoid mission creep.” I thought this was really interesting, where other things are creeping into my mission and distracting me from what I wanna do. So if I'm in the privileged position to not have to do things I don't wanna do, why do I? So we got into that you know, the scarcity mindset that I struggle with, some of the fear of saying “no”, wanting everyone — and this is a word that comes up for me — desperately to like me, and that's a really hard thing because you're setting yourself up for failure. So I guess I just came out of my therapy session, so I'm letting loose. But I am excited for 2021. Do you have any resolutions?

Jan 8

37 min 13 sec

This is your ultimate guide to the G-Spot, G-Zone, ejaculation, squirting and more! We answer all of your questions including: Can everyone have a squirter orgasm? How do you learn to squirt? What is the G-Spot and what is the G-Zone? Is there a difference between squirting and ejaculation? What is a squirter orgasm? Can you ejaculate without having an orgasm? How can you stimulate the G-Zone? What are the best toys for G-Zone stimulation? What toys can help you to squirt? Does the volume of ejaculate relate to the intensity of the orgasm? And much more! To learn more about the products that can potentially stimulate the g-spot, check out the Womanizer Duo, the We-Vibe Rave, Crave's Flex Vibrator, and the We-Vibe Nova 2. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. G-Spots, G-Zones & Squirting 00:00:05 - 00:05:03 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr jazz. Podcast i'm your co host brandon. Where here with my always lovely. Other half dr jess. And it's the last podcast of twenty twenty last conversation at twenty twenty. Dr justice decided. She's not going to speak to me for a couple days. We know i'm not gonna stop speaking. I'm always going to be talking. I think it's funny. When you call me dr jess it's only on the podcast and where was whereas the other in bed in bet anyone has to call me. Dr been the running joke for what fourteen years. Yeah although i heard someone use it the other day they stole it stole. my joke. Stole your jokes patent in these things. So today we're going to be talking about squirting and ejaculation ejaculation orgasms. And i think when we think about ejaculation. We tend to think about penis says. But it's for all bodies. Squirting of course is not a sideshow trick. You don't get points for volume or distance force and it doesn't even mean you have a bigger or better orgasm although for some people that's their experience but i think for most of us what we know about squirting or what we believe about squirting comes from pornography and i get so many questions about squirting people wanna know you know how to do it. Can everybody do it. what do you use to do it. What is it is it p. How do i get my partner to do it. Does it really feel good. What do i do and my partner doesn't want to do it. And i have to admit that. I'd seen ninety percent of the questions i receive around. Squirting are really rooted in performance. And i think even beginning with the language it's important to note that squirting is a bit of a misnomer because unless you've got us super soaker two thousand hidden in your vagina. It's not always a big squirt across the room again in porn. I know that it's a very visual medium. So it's always going across the room taken camera two camera. Tuesday only got a switch to camera. One go to the wide angle but in real life it might be more of a drip or a dribble as opposed to a really visible gush. And if you've ever had the sex and then gotten up after the sex and there's a wet spot in bed and then you tell your partner. Hey switch sides with me. I can't sleep in that wet spot.

Dec 2020

42 min 4 sec

There is almost nothing better than sharing how you feel about your partner, and this “dating profile” gift is a simple, but powerful gift that keeps on giving. This week, Jess’ cousins Annabella & Denise join us to share this homemade, no-cost, gift: A dating profile written for a loved one. Jess also shares one she wrote for her Mom, and Brandon and Jess share one another’s. We encourage you to try this one yourself and let us know how it goes! Rough transcript of the podcast below: Welcome. It’s the end of the year and there is no better time to check in with your health. And our partner LetsGetChecked lets you do all of your health testing from home — from hormones to thyroid to STIs to cholesterol to iron to lime disease — test from home, send it in and get secure results online. Go to LetsGetChecked.com and please use code DRJESS to save and to let them know you heard about their services here. Last year around this time, Brandon and I did an exercise based on a 2017 article in the NYT entitled, 'You May Want to Marry my Husband' by Amy Krouse Rosenthal. In the piece, which she wrote from her deathbed, Rosenthal writes about her husband’s many appealing qualities as though she is writing his dating profile. Now back in 2017, I was away on a long business trip and I read her article on a plane — I was messy crying the whole time. She sings his praises after 26 years of marriage and she passes away 10 days later. I was so moved by the piece and inspired that I used it to write Brandon’s dating profile — just in point form and I sent it to him via text and of course, we both ended up in tears. And so I ended up using the column as inspiration for a group exercise. I was working with a group of couples in Prague and I asked them to to read Rosenthal’s column and then write a dating profile for their partner as a reminder of why they love them and to help reignite the passion. Every participant (and even their two Czech translators) struggled to contain their tears as they read the article and made a list of their partners best qualities. When they were done, they reported feeling more present, grateful, in love and intimate with their partners. The shift of energy in the room was palpable and they were grateful that I excused myself so they could bask in the afterglow without my clinical interference. So last year on the podcast, Brandon and I redid the exercise. I wrote his dating profile, he wrote mine and we shared them with each other on the podcast. We’re going to briefly read these and you u can definitely go back and listen to that episode now (it’s Episode 89) to listen to our reactions, but this year, I wanted to try something different. I want to try this process for other folks we love in our lives because the expression of love, of course, extends far beyond romantic or intimate partners. So I’ve written my mom’s dating profile, which I’m going to share. And my cousin Anna is here and she has written her mom, Denise’s profile. And they’re both joining us now. Anna’s dating profile for her Mom, Denise: There's a lot to be said about my Mom which needs more than five minutes. A quiet, calm, strong base of the family. The best listener, and because of that - the best advice giver. She's so understanding it's annoying. She has this ability to see all sides even when tensions/emotions are high, and speak rationally about it. She always helps me from cakes to school work. She always gives her time, her emotional capacity, she ALWAYS cares. She gives the best hugs. She's funny in a nice way, she doesn't pick on people for jokes. She's quirky. She's able to enjoy the moment so well. She's dedicated and hard working. She's graceful like the fairytales. She has a crazy amount of patience even when you don't deserve it. Her baking and cooking :) And she loves to share that love. I also wrote my Mom’s dating profile (she’s the best):

Dec 2020

27 min 5 sec