The Alchemy Experience

Christopher Lembke

In these episodes we dive deep into the challenging aspects of life, in the pursuit of making some sense of this thing we call life. Our concept is to have an open discussion with the public that offers a variety of viewpoints and approaches to any topic we delve into. It also allows us to hear questions and experiences from every day walk of life from our listeners and we then share them live on the show. On occasion we will have guests with specific knowledge join in by invitation to widen our topics. You will also find that we will treat more metaphysical and esoteric subjects as well as the ones more towards mindfulness.

We will also try to bridge the polarisation that exists in society today. The only way that we see this being done is by being role models and showing up in public as such. You can expect to hear guests of opposing views having civil and compassionate discord during these episodes. This is what we feel is needed at every level of society today and less of the fear mongering that goes on.

All Episodes

"If you desire healing, let yourself fall ill, let yourself fall ill." - RumiThe aspects of ourselves that we refuse to accept and that hide from us remain in our blindspots. The denial of our whole person; the good, the bad and the ugly, without that kind of judgement nor labelling is the resistance we exercise preventing us from moving into flow and our greateness.  Blindspots and denial are the unconscious and conscious aspects of the same process. Our limiting beliefs and blockages are sometimes quite plain for us to see, but we aren't aware of their impact on our lives. However, they can also reside in our subconscious stemming from experiences of which we have no conscious memories.  They are revealed through our words, thoughts and actions, especially when we are triggered by experiences. Which is why we mustn't waste a good trigger, they are the clues to finding the optimised version of ourselves. Whatever triggers us, an aspect of that is held unhealed within ourselves, so observe your experiences and how you respond to them. When you are triggered, ask yourself, "Interesting, I wonder when I experienced this fear the first time?". First of all you interrupt the negative thought process by a inquisitive thought and by asking a question, you subconscious is compelled to give you an answer. If you are observant you will then get the path towards healing that aspect within yourself that was triggered by your external experience.  Be mindful of the dismissal and denial of the memories that might surface. What you may process as benign in adulthood, could very well be the original wounding that is the source of the energy that is holding you back. Your experience as a child is going to be from a completely different perspective than that of you as a person with a fully formed brain. Hence, view your experience from that younger perspective with compassion, acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude. Also, acknowledge and recognise the experience of your younger self for what it was, and ask that aspect of yourself it is indeed ok for you to let go of it and move on from it. When you are working through these aspects of yourself it is important to treat yourself with authenticity, compassion, love and kindness. We tend to become defensive and lashing out, but try to move into a space of raw acceptance of who you are and the experiences you've had. The defensiveness is there as your protection, and it has protected you until now, so show it gratitude and compassion, but allow it to be released. Surround yourself with authentic people that you feel safe to have honest conversations with to start discovering the whole of you. Start working with yourself understanding what makes you tick and what you desire for yourself. Practice being aware of all aspects of yourself all the time. By creating new patterns that serves for you to becoming the optimal version of yourself, you replace the old patterns that have served to protect you from the perspective of your core wounding.  The more of these patterns you release, the less of these blindspots and denial will be there for you to discover. However, there will always be these aspects and it is important to work with others who can help us reveal them, but they will be easier and easier to work through as you become more and more resourced to deal with them.   Support this podcast

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Dec 3

1 hr 8 min

Realising your accountability for your choices will shift your world“A man is whole only when he takes into account his own shadow.” – Djuna BarnesIf you embody nothing else, take this in; choice is a superpower. You choose how you think, speak and act, the three only things you control in life. Every choice activates a chain reaction of consequences for which we can only be accountable for our choice. However, being accountable for our choices does not equate to apportioning blame, it means you are aware of your choices and accept them and, if needed, forgive yourself for making them.  One malady coming from ignoring our own choices and accountability is the “Actor-Observer” cognitive bias. This bias is when we blame all “bad” experiences on outside factors and attribute all “good” things to ourselves. When we avoid accountability we give up our power to direct our life where we want it to be and to the experiences we want to have. Being accountable means taking back our power and understanding what we can control (listen to the podcast https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/podcast-control/ (Control) to gain a deeper understanding of this concept). The beautiful paradox is that, understanding that we can’t control our external environment and turning our attention inwards to the three things we can control; thoughts, words and actions, gives us full control of our journey.  Attributing blame outside ourselves only result in frustration, conflict, division, separation, and ultimately, lack of resolution to the challenge. With accountability we allow ourselves to see the bigger picture, we can uncover and heal our core wounds, start seeing ourselves in others, move into a state of flow, understand our role and the the role of others in our lives, and approach our experiences with https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/compassion-podcast/ (compassion), https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/acceptance-podcast/ (acceptance), https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/forgiveness-podcast/ (forgiveness )and https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/gratitude-podcast/ (gratitude).  Realising that we have a choice is an awakening. The choice is not necessarily as to what we do or how others see us, but rather how we perceive our experiences. One of the principles in Buddhism is the pursuit of non-attachment/non-judgement. So, your choices lie in how you perceive your experience and how you you are going react to it. We also have choice in how we react to choices we have made that lead to the outcomes of our experiences; it is we who judge them “good” or “bad”. Especially when we have experienced trauma, reconciling that our choices had an impact on the outcome, is a tough pill to swallow, not to mention forgiving ourselves and others and finding the gift of a lesson in it. Again, we go back to non-judgment, whether someone chooses to find the gifts and learn from trauma or to continue to suffer under the weight of victimhood, we accept their journey for what it is, but that is also a choice that we make as individuals.  Often, when we look back at our choices, we tend to become hesitant to make choices, it can paralyse us, because we might mainly have made choices that led to challenges. However, the more work we do on ourselves and listen to our inner guidance, we will find flow and peace in our choices, because we accept them and their outcomes as purposeful. Remember though that before you are given validation for that you can https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/trust-podcast/ (trust), you need to embody trust and have faith in that your journey has lead you to where you are so that you are optimally prepared to move forward to where you are going.  Support this podcast

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Nov 26

1 hr 10 min

The definition of Consciousness has eluded science thus far. As you will discover in this conversation, when we go into a state of expanded consciousness the ability to measure the brain activities stop. However, this fact does tell us when a person goes into that state, i.e. the lack of measurements is the clue, we can tell where the gate is, but we cannot peer through it with technology, we can only experience it within ourselves. Subtle energy changes with the expansion of consciousness, and that we can measure, so there are ways we can start to connect the dots. Of course to satisfy the terms of what is empirical data and isn't, we need to prove the means as to how we are connecting the dots and their validity. This episode is a first look into the "Science of Consciousness" and I hope to bring you more interviews with other perspectives on this topic. About the Monroe Institute (https://www.monroeinstitute.org/ (https://www.monroeinstitute.org/)) The Monroe Institute is the world leader in human consciousness exploration. Founded in the early 1970s as an educational and research organization by Robert A. Monroe, our experiential programs are offered on our main campus in Faber, Virginia USA as well as 12 additional countries and online. Using specially designed binaural beat audio-guided technology, originally developed by Bob Monroe, you will learn valuable tools to explore, navigate and use non-physical aspects of your own higher consciousness. Join the tens of thousands of people who have attended our retreats and awaken your consciousness to discover a new more compassionate perspective about yourself and others—what and who you are and why you are here. About Allyn Evans (Interim Executive Director and President, allyn@energymedicinesquared.com) Allyn, earned her BA in Psychology from the University of Mississippi and an MBA from Texas Tech University. She has been a beloved Monroe trainer for more than a decade and was instrumental in helping to launch Monroe’s virtual programming. She also played a key role in helping develop content for Monroe's new meditation app, Expand. Allyn is currently also Monroe's Chief Program Officer and trains Energy Medicine, not only at the Monroe Institute, but at locations around the world hosted by Monroe's international trainers. About Bob Holbrook (Technical Director, focusfreest8@aol.com) Bob Holbrook has been a student of consciousness for most of his life. He is an anthropologist with experience in South America, Africa, the Middle East and the United States. Bob studied Anthropology and Psychology at Ball State University, Indiana University and the University of Chicago. He studied Archaeology with the University of Michigan. Bob is an active member of the Society for the Anthropology of Consciousness, The Institute of Noetic Sciences and a certified provider with the Institute of Heartmath. He is presently working with individuals in the areas of addiction and post traumatic stress disorder. Support this podcast

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Nov 19

1 hr 30 min

Mark Boldizar, co-author of “Unleash Your Future” and co-founder of “New Science of Success”, joins us to talk about the Law of Transformation and how you really go about manifesting your reality. His work is beyond the gimmicky world of the Law of Attraction systems that promises instant riches, you put in the effort and the work and you reap the rewards. If you are new to empowering and manifesting your life, then Mark is the best starting point. If you have tried and succeeded or failed with the plethora of Law of Attraction systems out there, Mark's system will add the missing pieces to create sustainable success in your manifestation practice. Mark's book "Unleash Your Future" is an equally valuable read for the esoteric as well as the analytic. He co-authored the book with Takara Shelor and they each come at the practice from either perspective, but with the same process. You can find out more about Takara and Mark at https://newscienceofsuccess.com/?fbclid=IwAR1LFNHNyxfMmmVJlYfYq3wRMVtidhrgxgmioIazhD6Fbkx6h3GLK-U4v7U (https://newscienceofsuccess.com/) Support this podcast

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Nov 12

1 hr 45 min

Nothing motivates you to move forward in life as when you have lost everything. However, once you taken yourself out of the swamp, you can with the right mindset, you can also move through life without fear of having nothing, because you know you got out of it once before, and you can do it again. Shaahin Cheyene epitomises the journey “from rags to riches”. From making himself homeless at the age of 15 to putting drug barons out of business on the rave scene with his legal Herbal Ecstacy pill, to inventing the Vapir Vaporizer, to now teaching people Amazon Mastery. Our discussion spans the psychology of motivation and drive, origin of personal fear, perfection paralysis, definition of success, Vikings (no not the NFL team, the real Scandinavian ones) and much more. Check out the links to Shaahin’s various projects below and don’t forget to buy his book, “Billion – How I Became The King of The Thrill Pill Cult”. Shaahin is a master story teller, so you won’t be disappointed. All our listeners also get a special free gift from Shaahin, a free introductory course in to Amazon Mastery (value $200 (not exchangeable or transferrable)). Just send him an email with the subject “Alchemy” and he’ll send back instructions how to access the course. He promises there won’t be any need to give up any card details or similar. Shaahin’s email: darkzess@gmail.com Book: https://www.shaahincheyenne.com/book (https://www.shaahincheyenne.com/book) Hack and Grow Rich Podcast: https://www.shaahincheyenne.com/hack-and-grow-rich-podcast (https://www.shaahincheyenne.com/hack-and-grow-rich-podcast) Amazon Mastery Course: https://freecasestudy.fbasellercourse.com/home-amazon-mastery (https://freecasestudy.fbasellercourse.com/home-amazon-mastery) Support this podcast

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Nov 5

1 hr 27 min

"When I discover who I am, I will be free." - Ralph Ellison, Invisible Man"Do not let the memories of your past limit the potential of your future. There are no limits to what you can achieve on your journey through life , except in your mind." - Roy T. Bennett, The Light In The HeartThe concept of "potentiality" goes back to Aristotle, looking at "Actuality, or Activity" and "Potentiality". Intellectually it is not too challenging to understand the concept on its face value, i.e. what is your potential and what is what you actually manifest from that potential. However, when you start looking at where the potentiality of your life lies, it gets more complex. The potentiality lies in dimensions beyond our immediate perception and it is our own limitations that dictate what actuality you manifest from it. This is where "Free Will" comes into the equation. We may not perceive it, but we have free will as to what we draw from our potentiality into our physical expression. What you manifest lies in your mindset and ability to perceive. However, from what aspect of yourself are you exercising free will? Are you consciously aware of that aspect of yourself from where you direct your free will? I will venture to say, "you do not", in actual fact very few of us do. I am yet to fully connect and be aware of that aspect of myself, but I know it is there and I seek to come into alignment with it. My hope is that you are given some new perspectives and start to asking yourself some of the big questions to release you from the boundaries of your own limiting beliefs. Enjoy! About Luigi: Luigi Sciambarella is a Monroe Institute trainer in the UK and a hypno-psychotherapist. Since 2010, Luigi has been teaching and giving talks on meditation, lucid dreaming and personal development around the world to thousands of people who are interested in exploring the many different facets of mind (conscious, unconscious and everything in-between). This has led Luigi to develop a deep understanding of the waking, dreaming and sleeping mind and the phenomena of lucid dreaming, out of body experiences, sleep paralysis, insomnia and the various parasomnias that can disturb a good night’s sleep. Monroe Institute: http://www.monroeinstitute.org/ (www.monroeinstitute.org) Monroe Institute UK: http://www.monroeinstituteuk.org/ (www.monroeinstituteuk.org) Day and Night Therapy: http://www.dayandnighttherapy.com/ (www.dayandnighttherapy.com) Monroe Institute’s Expand app: https://info.monroeinstitute.org/get-expand-app (https://info.monroeinstitute.org/get-expand-app) Contact Luigi either at: luigi@monroeinstituteuk.org or luigi@dayandnighttherapy.com The Infinity Life If you want to get to the bottom of releasing your limiting beliefs, please also have a look at our 8-week training programme to help you develop tools and practices that can help release your core wounds and energetic blockages. www.theinfinity.life Support this podcast

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Oct 29

1 hr 49 min

Who am I?“The outer world is a reflection of the inner world. Other people’s perception of you is a reflection of them; your response4 to them is an awareness of you.” Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the HeartIf you are familiar with psychology, you can compare authenticity to Carl Rogers’ identification of the “Organismic Self”. With that he refers to that aspect of ourselves where we spend our lives trying return and express. It is the original true self that we were before we started taking on conditionings from our external world and processing them into our perception of our surroundings. Carl Jung’s equivalent would the “Self”. It is where we develop from. Spiritually leaning minds will refer to our authenticity as the soul aspect of ourselves.  Irrespective of the conceptualisation, our authentic selves is that aspect of ourselves that is pure and without any influences from the outside. This aspect starts to be covered and hidden as we start experiencing the world and making conscious judgements as to what it means to us. If we had the wisdom to only learn about ourselves from our experiences and know that the outside world is only there as a reference point for us to experience ourselves, we would remain enlightened and authentic from birth, but then where would the fun be in that? However, it is concept important to keep in mind as we start peeling back the layers of the onion in pursuit of our authentic selves, it gives us a roadmap to find our way back to our organismic selves.  If you have read any of my musings you will know that I consider most of humanity to be asleep, and in this respect most of us are unaware of our pursuit back to our authentic selves. In fact, in our blind unawareness we strive to react to the conditionings we have layered on top of our authenticity, which causes us to resist the path back to our origins. Waking up to this Indiana Jonesesque adventure only requires one thing and that is to sincerely and deeply ask the question, “Who am I?”. As you may know, once you ask a question with a sincere quest to find an answer, your entire being is compelled to give you an answer. You may not be your authenticity, but you quest to find your answer will be lead by the way of your authenticity and thus you will find it as a biproduct of your quest. However, once you find “it” and you discover other truths of who you are you will discover new aspects of your authenticity, thus you will only ever find your authenticity as it relates to the moment where you are perceiving yourself through your experiences.  With “the question” you also begin a process of shifting your attention from an external to an internal locus of evaluation. Your perception is not; “who do others think I am?”, to “who am I projecting to others?”. When we then start to process our core wounds and how we act out from them, we can also start healing our original sensitising events (traumas). Through this healing process we uncover more and more aspects of our authentic selves. It is hard work and it is a lifelong process, but the rewards are immeasurable and will gradually come to you as you heal.  So, as yourself the question, “Who am I?”, with a pure desire to wanting to know the answer. Good luck! Support this podcast

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Oct 22

1 hr 1 min

Spend time in someone's darkness“Sometimes all a person wants is an empathetic ear, all he or she needs is to talk it out. Just offering a listening ear and an understanding heart for his or her suffering can be a big comfort.” – Roy T. BennettEmpathy is the ability to put oneself in the situation of another experiencing emotions, ideas or opinions of that person. Whereas, sympathy is feeling bad for someone’s suffering, but cannot feel or resonate with the actual feeling of that person. In order to be empathetic we must have experienced the feeling that the other person is feeling, and even better, recognise it for what the emotion is, i.e. name it. If we lack the spectrum of emotions we are not likely to be able to be empathetic. In society we see this in the division and the inability to empathise with the perspectives and opinions of others; by and large humanity today lacks the emotional intelligence (EQ) to be empathetic. The good news is that this merely a lack of practice.  We grow up learning and being conditioned that emotions are something to fear and avoid. As a result we react by being sad, upset or pissed off, we simply do not know how else to react to our emotions. Hence, the first step to empathy is to improve one’s EQ. Behaving empathically is where we come upon the grey areas. For me it comes down to taking a compassionate perspective and accepting someone’s experience and path, irrespective of my mind’s opinion of that might be. One must recognise that any action one takes involving oneself in the experiences of others, one has to also take the consequences of that action. Consider some examples, a close relation who’s struggling with addiction, some one we love choosing unorthodox healing options to deal with a serious illness, or some other very challenging situation. I can think of many different options for action, or inaction, that all would cause severe consequences for an individual not directly involved but in a position to act. I need to mindful if my discomfort of holding empathic space for someone influences my motivation to act in one way or another. If that is the case, I am no longer empathic, I am acting to avoid my own pain. It is a challenging to sit in someone’s darkness without trying to brighten up the space in someway, but that is the empathic path.  Are you always following the empathic path? Support this podcast

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Oct 15

48 min 23 sec

Pay attention, there is gold in them there hills“I do believe in an everyday sort of magic – the inexplicable connectedness we sometime experience with places, people, works of art and the like, the eerie appropriateness of moments of synchronicity; the whispered voice, the hidden presence, when we think we are alone.” Charles de LintThe concept of “synchronicities” was popularised by Carl Jung in the first part of the 20th century. As a definition, a synchronicity is the acausal connection of two or more psychic and physical phenomena. It is in essence a connection between your deepest feelings and experiences with a physical event or occurrence in the external world.  Today, synchronicities are probably more synonymous with spirituality than psychology. However, whether you are coming from a theist or an nihilist perspective is irrelevant, the concept of synchronicities applies equally.  For the spiritual person, synchronicities can be messages from guides, the universe, God, angels, etc. While, for those how do not believe in any higher power, synchronicities are psychological triggers as to what one holds in one’s subconscious. Synchronicities can be explained using the Reticular Activating System, the internal body clock, the neuropathways, and the various centres and rewards systems in your brain. Essentially, what draws your focus has a match in your subconscious and requires your attention. At any rate, they aren’t mere coincidences and you ignore them at your own peril.  Irrespective of one’s belief system, when we resonate with a synchronicity, it is important to observe the experience and pay attention to one’s intuition to understand what is being conveyed to us. If you look up synchronicities on the internet you are bound to find all sorts of interpretations to various common synchronicities; such as angel numbers, power animals, feathers, etc. Freud himself had a system of interpretations of dreams, even though they mostly lead back to that you were in love with your mother. I have found, however, that, because of our unique make up, one cannot determine what a synchronicity means to any one person by a system. Sure, all things hold various vibrations and frequencies, but when they resonate with you, they take on a unique character and meaning. I am a proponent of interpreting the meaning of synchronicities from the perspective of the individual, not from a system. My advice is, listen to your intuition and take the meaning you look up in the many sources out there with a pinch of salt.  Start to pay attention and question everything. Once you ask the question, your mind is compelled to give you an answer, but you have to make the first move.  Support this podcast

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Oct 8

57 min 26 sec

Being able to feel guilt and shame is good“Watch out for each other. Love everyone and forgive everyone, incluyding yourself. Forgive your anger. Forgive your guilt. Your shame. Your sadness. Embrace and open up your love, your joy, your truth, and most especially, your heart” – Jim Henson, Creator of the Muppets.David R. Hawkins (https://veritaspub.com/) his scale of consciousness in his book “Power vs. Force”, more commonly referred to as the “Hawkins Scale”. It measures one’s level of consciousness, by a function of emotion that you hold in your body, on a scale between 0 and 1000. We can measure this by the single emotion that traverses your body or the embodiment of emotion that you hold. Guilt and shame are the two emotions, or rather energies, that hold the lowest frequency and are the most damaging to ourselves. Psycho and Sociopaths lack the ability to experience these emotions, but contrary to popular beliefs, sufferers of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) experience deep levels of shame, it is one of the starting points for that condition. However, they do not experience guilt. Guilt and shame are useful as communication tool from ourselves to let our consciousness know that we are doing something or behaving in a way that is out of alignment with our authenticity. As described earlier, if you lack the ability to feel these emotions, I recommend you see a mental health professional.   The major problem for most people is that we do not realise that we have a choice in letting go of shame and guilt (shame being “I am bad” and guilt “I did something bad”). Some might realise their choice, but find reasons why they should choose to hold on to these emotions. Hold on to them long enough and they become embodied. These choices are always, in the end, based on an external factor, such as “If I don’t hold on to it, who will?” or “If I don’t feel shameful or guilty, people will think that I am callous and don’t care”. More often than not these thoughts are based on assumptions of the expectations of others. Again, more often than not, these assumptions are false, there is, in fact, no one judging you. However, even if there is, does that force you to make a choice whether or not to hold on to guilt and shame? You can learn more about your relationship with judgement in the article and podcast called “https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/judgement-podcast/ (Judgement)“. The bottom line is that others judging you has more to do with their experiences than with you. The choice is yours.  The length of time that you hold on to the emotion is up to you, but a rule of thumb is that when you have understood and embodied the lesson or the communication that the emotion is there to give you, it will release itself. At that point you have already accepted the experience and forgiven yourself. That could be 10 minutes or 80 years, or anything in between and beyond, it is up to you. When you do release these energies from your body, you will feel lighter and more free as they tend to hold you tightly wound and tied to them.  Working through core wounds and emotions takes practice. Starting with shifting your mindset and the way you view your emotions. Start practicing observing your emotions from the perspective of your awareness without judgement. This will allow you to experience your emotions without attaching to and acting out on them. You will also be able to change your thought patterns from perpetuating the emotion to understanding them. Showing yourself compassion for your experiences, accepting them and forgiving yourself and others will then lead you to understanding why that experience was there and how you can learn about yourself from it. The Infinity Life (https://theinfinity.life/ (theinfinity.life)) has an 8-week programme that gives you the tools that can help you clear your core wounds and the energetic blockages you hold. At The Alchemy Experience... Support this podcast

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Oct 1

59 min 30 sec

It's never too late to choose life“To avoid experiencing the anxious quiver at the core of our being, where we might feel the chaos of uncertainty or the pain of unhealed wounds, we weave a protective cocoon of beliefs and identities.” – Ezra Bayda, At Home in the Muddy Watter Many of us have one or several main core wounds and a bunch of minor ones. In psychology they are also known as “Original Sensitising Events” (OSE’s). These are all based in experiences from the past where we were left with an impression that stayed with us. This impression then became a basis for a belief, which in turn became a pattern and part of our personality. The impression might have been; “It is not safe for me to express my opinion”, “If I fail my family might not love me”, “I can’t do anything right”, etc. That impression is often formed at a time in our childhood where we are yet to develop the concept of “individual thought”, which is usually between 9 and 11. Before then we have this idea that if I think “I am not loveable”, then everybody else has that same thought. Hence, if you have a thought that, if someone else has that same thought, would be a threat to your livelihood, you develop defence mechanisms to prevent that from happening, i.e. we might over compensate. For example, if you core wound is “abandonment” there might be several beliefs resulting from that and you would then go out of your way to ensure that you aren’t abandoned again, which might result in people pleasing, pushing people away to not give them a chance to abandon you, being guarded so that people don’t get to know you because they might then abandon you, etc.  As with all aspects in life, this topic is very complex in how the core wound appears, manifests, how we act from it and eventually, hopefully, identify and clear it. The core wounds are lodged very hard in our system, they are hard wired because of how intrinsic they become to our programming and conditioning. This is why it is so difficult to even be able to identify these patterns, and even more challenging, identifying their root causes. You might also recognise these as karmic energies. Our brains will use our programming and conditioning to search out experiences to validate what we believe. Our subconscious doesn’t know what is for your best, it only enhances and enforces what it is fed. This is why it is so important to realise our superpower of choice; we are the thinkers not our thoughts. With that in mind we can take charge and release our core wounds’ hold on us.  Alas, the first step is to recognise and acknowledge there are patterns that derive from your core woundings. Once you are able to identify these patterns, the triggers that you experience that set off your defence mechanism are your clues to your core woundings. There are many different ways people deal with their core woundings, whether that is through psychotherapy, hypnotherapy, energy healing, aroma therapy, meditation, etc., there are many ways of getting to root of one’s problems. One techniques is called “The Infinity Life”, which is a course where you learn tools to help clear your core woundings and energetic blockages preventing their release. It’s an 8 week course that you can then become qualified to teach yourself. To find out more, https://theinfinity.life/?ref=1 (click here “The Infinity Life”) (transparency disclosure, the author is a founding member). The point is that we hold the vibrations of our core wounding and part of the solution is to raise our frequencies beyond the negativity of our core woundings. I am not suggesting her, by any means, that you practice spiritual bypass (to learn more about it, check out the episode on https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/spiritual-bypass/ (“Spiritual Bypass”)) and supress or dismiss the work and the emotions coming up around it. To the contrary, fully acknowledge and recognise your shadow self and integrate it into your being is, in my... Support this podcast

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Sep 24

1 hr 3 min

Is your glass half empty or half full?“The eye only sees what the mind is ready to comprehend” – Robertson Davies, Tempest-TostThe general attention of your mind is your mindset or bias. Some common biases are: Positive Ambivalent Negative Aggressive Defensive Controlling Submissive These occur through establishing patterns and behaviours based on our experiences. For example, the brain does not know the difference between fear and excitement, it is our perception based on our experiences that determine whether the signals go to the the amygdala or the nucleus accumbens. It has been said that “brain cells that fire together, and your bias is determined how your brain is wired. The good news is that you can rewire it if your bias is not working for you.  The challenge is that we tend to end up in these self-confirming loops. We have the core wounding, or original sensitising event, that plants plants the seed for the pattern and the interpretation. As new experiences will come up reminding your brain about the original wounding, you will then be further validated that the thoughts you had around the original wounding are correct. Your reticular activating system will then be on the lookout for aspects of your experiences to further validate the original wounding. And around it goes.  Your connection to the core wounding are your emotions, which you can’t control. However, if you understand that you don’t need to engage with your emotions, but rather observe them from you awareness, then you can also observe your thoughts arising with the emotion, and your thoughts you can control, so you can direct them where they can reflect on the emotion rather than perpetuating it. If you can find your way back and heal the core wounding and direct your thoughts, then you can alter your bias. However, mind yourself, because unless you have self-actualised and become enlightened, you are likely to end up with a new bias, perhaps one more in alignment with your authenticity, but a bias all the same. Support this podcast

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Sep 17

1 hr 4 min

What's your contribution?“Out beyond ideas of wrong doing and right doing, there is a field. I will meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full, to talk about. Ideas, language, even the phrase “each other” doesn’t make any sense.” – RumiThe collective consciousness was very much the territory of philosophers, mystics and spiritualists up until the late 1970’s when research started out, slowly to begin with, to progressively build up in density among projects over the next 50 years; and counting. With such prestigious organisations as Stanford University, University of Virginia, Princeton University, et al, having conducted, and in most cases, are conducting, research into the collective consciousness it is becoming increasingly difficult for the antagonists to shout “pseudoscience” from the roof tops as is customary. The emerging prominence of quantum physics has contributed a great deal to the inclusion of this field of research into the inner echelons of science. Quantum physics intersects in many areas with philosophies of consciousness and thus the collective consciousness, which gives us some possible markers to start explaining the collective conscious from a scientific perspective.  In here and in the podcast we will approach it from the philosophical and experiential perspective. We know and can measure the Gravitational, Electric and Magnetic fields, but in the beginning of the 20th century there were theories emerging relating to the Morphogenetic field. This is a force field through which cells can communicate to establish what type of tissue a particular group is supposed to become and where they go in the body. Until recently we have not been able to measure this field, we just know it is there. A very exciting experiment led by Michael Levin from Tuft University shows how interacting with the morphogenetic fields of cells, they can alter what part of a body is grown and where it is grown. Watch this TEDtalk for the full story https://www.ted.com/talks/michael_levin_the_electrical_blueprints_that_orchestrate_life?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare (https://www.ted.com/talks/michael_levin_the_electrical_blueprints_that_orchestrate_life?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare). What it shows is that with interaction we can change the regenerative process of cells. Anyone involved in any healing modalities, such as Reiki, Acupuncture, etc. works with this in an intuitive and metaphysical level. What we are addressing here is the energy, or subtle, body, and it is important for the discussion about the collective consciousness because it is, in my experience, the conduit for our consciousness to interact with the collective. Most people are unaware of their subtle bodies and how their consciousness interacts with the collective. However, when we are conscious about our own energy and consciousness we can direct our energy to allow our consciousness interact with the subtle bodies and consciousness of others. These are called fields of influence: Learning/Creativity Creation of order/coherence Intapersonal and collective entrainment Healing Social Impact Perception We can interact with these fields through, what’s known as, Psi or Tele-prehension, or, more colloquially, psychically.  “I came to the conclusion that we should aspire to increase the scope and scale of human consciousness in order to better understand what questions to ask. Really, the only thing that makes sense is to strive for greater collective enlightenment” – Elon MuskThe collective consciousness is thus, the field that makes up all the consciousness or all living things and we all interact with it. However, consciousness is fractal by nature and thus, if you have a family or a group of people at work or a team, they all form collectives that feed their unique energy signatures in to the bigger collective. It is this... Support this podcast

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Sep 10

1 hr 20 min

Avoiding our greatness out of fear“Tim and again, we let the fear of loss overpower rational decision-making and often make ourselves worse off just to avoid a potential loss. Psychologists call this loss aversion, and it means we often tend to prefer avoiding losses at the expense of acquiring gains” – L. Jon WethereinYou may be familiar with the saying, “Better the devil you know.” This mindset of keeping ourselves small prevents us from moving on to becoming better versions of ourselves. We rather keep ourselves in a job, relationship or other situation that makes us miserable than cut our losses and seek our happiness. On the more extreme side of the spectrum we have the situations where someone is challenged with long-term mental or physical illness. In these cases it is common that the limitations of the illness or condition becomes part of their identity and ingrained patterns. Anyone on the outside of this experience will find it hard to understand the challenges people suffering from pathological loss aversion. They might cling to their secondary or tertiary “benefits”, which will appear as if they are clinging to their condition. They can also suffer from grief if they recover from their condition. On the surface, all these manifestations are mostly incomprehensible to anyone not suffering from this type of loss aversion. The bottom line is, moving on from what you know to the unknown is scary and it takes great courage and self-awareness to do it. If the environment we have operated within hasn’t killed us, it appears safe, which is more than we an say about the future that we know nothing about. Essentially, loss aversion is a safety mechanism meant to keep us safe from death. We also tend to be stuck in our mindset and when we lack the ability to assess our own situation and experiences, we cannot break out of the pattern. Patterns do get ingrained in our psyche and become part of who we are and how we respond to the environments and experiences around us. For example, our brains don’t know the difference between fear and excitement, it is our perception of it that determines the neuropathways that the brain will fire through, so if we continuously assign it to fear, we build up that pattern and our subconscious will then run that programme for us. Changing that programming will take for us to; a) wake up to the fact that we are running the programme, b) commit to change, and c) do the work to change, all while there are no guarantees that it will be better than where we were. If we have done the work and continuously heal our core wounding, and follow our intuition and guidance from our higher selves, we will always end up in a better situation. Making the tough choices often times are for the best in the long-term. That is not to say that making rash, spur of the moment decisions are necessarily going to make life less challenging. However, we tend to analyse our future based on our past experiences and not listen to our guidance and view it from the perspective where we want to be. Some key concepts and tools to help us with loss aversion are: Developing a perspective of our own mortality. Trying to see that whenever that time comes that it is going to be ok and it is nothing we control, accept that it is going to be what it is going to be. View how change has been in our previous experiences when we’ve made the tough choices. Gain perspective on our experiences that they are there to teach us about ourselves and anything else relating to the experience is impermanent. Use visioning and future pacing to experience the future in our present moment. How does it feel to step into the shoes of the experience that we desire? Establish a mindfulness practice and practices to develop our intuition and higher guidance. Accept our choices and hold ourselves accountable without judgement or blame. Often times it is beyond our own resourcing to move past loss aversion, so working with professional... Support this podcast

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Sep 3

1 hr 11 min

Do you trust yourself to know your boundaries?“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable we feel used and mistreated. This is why we sometimes attack which they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behaviours or a choice.” – Brené Brown, The Gift of ImperfectionContrary to popular beliefs, boundaries are not hare borders nor fences. We tend to put them up before anyone even threatens them; our fight or flight systems are perpetually firing pumping out harmful cortisol in our bodies. We use any transgression to show our strength and power to those around us. These perspectives result in the perpetuation of anger, hate, power, division, etc. As with many other of these aspects of humanity we act from our experiences with our external world, whereas we experience the world from outside our body, not from a self-reflective perspective. We insist on viewing our experiences as opportunities to learn about our our environment and people around us, not to learn about the only consistent factor in all our experiences; ourselves! They are not tripwires for us to react to, but rather opportunities to observe and learn about ourselves.  Boundary work is an ongoing practice and requires patience and trust to succeed. Your boundaries are fluid and dynamic and change with every moment and experience you have. They depend on every conceivable element that you or anybody you interact bring along to the experience. It is far complex for us to work out for ourselves how to modulate our boundaries in any given moment. Only your work on your own baggage will determine how well you modulate your boundaries. How you react to your boundaries being violated are measurements on your ability to remain mindful and present in your moments. How do you respond to your boundaries being crossed? Do these reactions serve you? We can maintain our boundaries and still act compassionately. Communicating your boundaries authentically from your space of compassion is all you need to do. Others can then choose to respect or violate our boundaries; this is out of our control. We can only control our thoughts, our words and our actions. When we don’t trust our boundaries, or rather that we know where our boundaries are, we go into fear mode and start operating from our core wounding and conditioning. The work we do on ourselves will reward us with increased trust. The more we respect and love ourselves, the better we will know ourselves, and, thus, the more we will trust ourselves.  Know thyself and you shall know your boundaries. Good luck with your work.  Support this podcast

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Aug 27

55 min 43 sec

To trust or not to trust, that is the question“Intuition is really a sudden immersion of the soul into the universal current of life.” – Paulo Coelho, The AlchemistTo me Sonia Choquette is one of the more prominent teachers of intuition specifically. She divides intuition into three areas: Red – survival and instinct Green – creative opportunities and ideas White – purpose and calling Red intuition you will probably have heard of being referred to as your “gut feeling”. It is when you have a “bad” feeling in your abdominal area about a situation, something just doesn’t feel right. Often times, for those who actively communicate with their intuition, it is also where the answer “no” resides. You can try this out for yourself; say no in a very negative way over and over again and tap into where “no” resonates in your body, if not in the abdomen.  When you have a idea or impulse of creativity, you may feel this warmth and buzzing feeling in your heart space; this is very likely what Sonia calls “green” intuition. In difference to your red intuition warning you “no”, this green one is all about possibilities, opportunities and shouting “yes” from the roof tops. Try the same exercise as above, but now say “yes” to yourself with as much positivity as yo can and feel where it resonates in your body, I would venture to say it resonates in your chest, or, if you like, your heart space.  White intuition is a little different in that it is more of a communication from another, higher, dimensional aspect of yourself; your higher self. For these purposes, your white intuition guides you in your big relationships, life decisions, purpose, and other life path/journey related decisions. One of the originators of modern Psychiatry, Carl Jung, had a name for his; Philemon. In his “The Red Book” he describes his pursuit and engagement with Philemon. Sonia also recommends building a relationship with your white intuition/higher self, starting by asking him/her/it for a name. From there your begin the conversation.  Building up a working relationship with your intuition requires preparation, in terms of a continuous practice, and patience. You build up a knowledge of how your intuition communicates with you, and the language being used. The language and means of communications are aspects that are unique to you based on your experiences and your frequency. Intuition rarely comes through as instructions in your local language, it communicates in symbolism based on your frame of, mainly, subconscious reference. Spend time talking about, and sharing, your intuition with others. Bring it into your reality through your physical expression. Your friends and family will probably think you are bonkers when you suddenly start talking about intuition, but it is worth it. A note of caution, don’t discount other people’s intuitive experiences in favour of your own. You trust yours and let others trust theirs without judgement or criticism.  Another important step in your preparations is to know your “baseline”. Anyone who has been part of my Psychometry classes will be very familiar with this. This practice is about training yourself to observe your experiences from your awareness without judgement or criticism. Your experiences in this case refers to sensations, emotions, thoughts, smells, tastes, visual and auditory impressions, etc. If you are aware of your baseline in every moment you know when there are changes in your experiences and you can then with your awareness and observation ascertain the purpose and objective of this new “energy”, if it is your intuition, you will then be fully aware of it and take appropriate action. Learning how to observe your experiences from your awareness is best done through mindfulness meditation.  Two other key concepts are discernment and trust. When you first start out, you are likely to misinterpret much of the information and perhaps even picking up information that... Support this podcast

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Aug 20

55 min 56 sec

"Who am I?", is most probably the question people ask themselves once they have an out-of-body experience (OBE). Imagine, you are fully awake, laying in your bed, eyes closed, and suddenly you feel your whole body vibrating like a train is rocking through your room. You find yourself more curious than afraid, but just as suddenly as they began the vibrations are gone, but now you are "standing" on the floor next to your bed looking down on your body. This reality appears more real to you than the on you experience while in your body, how is this possible? It is real and it has been going on for, at least, as long as we have recorded history. Psychology and scientists have attempted to explain it as physical phenomena, but it is unlikely that those people actually experienced it, or anything that wasn't available to them in their external world. Like many other things that science can't explain in the metaphysical field, these are experiences that people have to have for themselves and the individual becomes the scientific evidence for themselves. In this episode Luigi Sciambarella and I are discussing consciousness, the philosophies, the science, what happens when you direct it and much more. If you are intrigued by this subject and hope to have your own experiences, please check out the contact details below for Luigi and the Monroe Institute. About Luigi: Luigi Sciambarella is a Monroe Institute trainer in the UK and a hypno-psychotherapist. Since 2010, Luigi has been teaching and giving talks on meditation, lucid dreaming and personal development around the world to thousands of people who are interested in exploring the many different facets of mind (conscious, unconscious and everything in-between). This has led Luigi to develop a deep understanding of the waking, dreaming and sleeping mind and the phenomena of lucid dreaming, out of body experiences, sleep paralysis, insomnia and the various parasomnias that can disturb a good night’s sleep. Monroe Institute: http://www.monroeinstitute.org (www.monroeinstitute.org) Monroe Institute UK: http://www.monroeinstituteuk.org (www.monroeinstituteuk.org) Day and Night Therapy: http://www.dayandnighttherapy.com (www.dayandnighttherapy.com) Monroe Institute’s Expand app: https://info.monroeinstitute.org/get-expand-app (https://info.monroeinstitute.org/get-expand-app) Contact Luigi either at: luigi@monroeinstituteuk.org or luigi@dayandnighttherapy.com Support this podcast

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Aug 13

1 hr 59 min

"Don't sacrifice too much, because if you sacrifice too much there is nothing else you can give and nobody will care for you." - Karl LagerfeldIf you sacrifice yourself to your own detriment, you are a hero; that is the societal norm. However, the problem is that when you sacrifice yourself without any self-care you deplete yourself and you end up needing others to come to your rescue, by which time they will be used to you sacrificing yourself and now that you need help they will not accept the change. This is why, when people wake up to their own selves, and they start filling their own cup and setting up boundaries, they are seen as strange and selfish. Whereas the fact is that by fully practicing self-care they can then give by the order of magnitude with their full power and passion.  From our own points of view, it is always easier to help others than ourselves, there is immediate internal and external gratification. However, practicing self-care takes work and we usually suffer initial, and in some cases, sustained, backlashes from our existing tribes.  Self-care is a holistic practice where you tend to the needs of your: Physical body - nutrition, exercise, hydration, sleep, etc.  Mental body - perspective, awareness, emotions, sleep, etc.  Spiritual body - purpose, connection, understanding, etc. Energy body - energy hygiene, meditation, energy healing, etc.  Of course there is a balance between self-care and selfishness. If you suddenly drop all your responsibilities without any forewarning, you will have to suffer some significant consequences, that are going to make your self-care practice truly challenging. Find your balance and bring your practices on gradually and allow responsibilities to naturally release, rather than ripping them all off like a plaster. The goal is for you to become the VIP of your own life, and part of that is having the balance with self-care and supporting others.  Are you busy living or dying? It is your choice.  Support this podcast

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Aug 6

1 hr 4 min

From a child's point of view, it doesn't matter how consciously aware a parent is, there is always going to be trauma and core wounding appearing as we go through childhood. Children grow up in an an adult world, which is an entirely unknown dimension as far as the child's mind is concerned. As unique individuals we are always going to, at some level, feel like we don't fit in or that we have to work hard to be "normal". Often times we grow up and look back with comparative eyes thinking "I have nothing to complain about my childhood, it was good". However, we retrospect with our now adult eyes and compare our lives to others, while the wounding experienced by the child version of ourselves does not have that luxury and the trauma is experienced as a unique occurrence. We all have our core wounds to work on, some more and some less, but it is there, not to be ignored. Some of us have the fortune to realise this as we grow older and we address our core wounds and seek to heal them. Our discussion in this episode is centered around recognising, assessing and healing our core wounds. This episode is simulcast on the "You Are Amazing TV" channel hosted by "The Best you TV". You will find it onhttp://youareamazingtv.com/ ( http://youareamazingtv.com/), Roku, AppleTV, Google Play, Amazon Fire Stick and The Best You TV App (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.onestudio.thebestyoutv&hl=en_GB&gl=US (Android) and https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-best-you-tv/id1530606320 (Apple)) On You Are Amazing TV you will find other episodes like this one as well as wonderful and inspiring stories from real people creating real change for themselves and humanity as a whole. The pane guests this time are: Barbie Layton: Speaker, healer, psychic and teacher extraordinaire, as well as owner and hostess of the "You Are Amazing TV" channel on The Best You TV. http://youareamazingtv.com/ (http://youareamazingtv.com/) Glenn Evans: Currently transitioning from a very successful career in the engineering trades to helping men work through their traumas and challenges. https://www.instagram.com/907wabisabiaf/ (https://www.instagram.com/907wabisabiaf/) Karol Kosinski: hypnotherapist, coach, instructional designer, academic developer and meditation teacher. https://www.karolkosinski.org/ (https://www.karolkosinski.org/) Support this podcast

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Jul 30

1 hr 49 min

In this epispode Barbie Layton and I discuss "Visioning". Visioning is different from visualisation in the way that you tell the story and the energy you build up to fuel the manifestation. With visualisation techniques, the visuals are the focus, whereas with visioning the visuals are a means to an end. They are used to build up a story that excites you and evokes the embodied feelings that you desire when you have the experiences that you visualise. It is important in visioning to use your language, body and speach to build up the excitement. The excitement is used as booster for the embodied feeling. You start where you feel comfortable and then build it up from there, i.e. you start the story where you can believe it. In visualisations you hold the visuals, but in visioning you detach from the visuals when you have evoked the feeling so that you don't end up attaching to the visualised future. Visioning also allows for the story to evolve as you combine your intuition and imagination to build up the visioning, further amplifying the excitement and boosting the embodied feeling. Visioning helps to alleviate the tendency to worry about how to acheive your dream and preventing to attach to the end results, both of which will have counterproductive results for the manifestation. This episode is simulcast on the "You Are Amazing TV" channel hosted by "The Best you TV". You will find it on http://youareamazingtv.com/, Roku, AppleTV, Google Play, Amazon Fire Stick and The Best You TV App (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.onestudio.thebestyoutv&hl=en_GB&gl=US (Android) and https://apps.apple.com/us/app/the-best-you-tv/id1530606320 (Apple)) On You Are Amazing TV you will find other episodes like this one as well as wonderful and inspiring stories from real people creating real change for themselves and humanity as a whole. Support this podcast

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Jul 23

1 hr 16 min

Know your judge to master it“We never know the quality of someone else’s life, though we seldom resist the temptation to assume and pass judgement.” – Tami Hoag, “Dark Horse”The verb “to judge” means to form an opinion or conclusion about something or someone. Technically, this means that everytime you voice your opinion about someone you are in judgement. For me, I think there is a distinction between being judgemental and sharing concern for someone; it comes down to the motives behind the opinion. I try to ask questions such as; “For whose benefit am I having this opinon?”, “Is my opinion a reflection of any of my shadow aspects?” or “Would I share this opinion with the person I have the opinion about?”.   In Positive Intelligence (https://www.positiveintelligence.com/ (https://www.positiveintelligence.com/)) they note that we all have a “judge” within us, judging ourselves, others and situations. The first step in dealing with the judge is to recognise that you have one, and trust me, you do. Familiarise yourself with it and pay attention how it talks to you about your experiences, others and yourself. What are the aspects that your judge attches to? Your judge might be superior, dismissive, vain, pride, or some other character. Once you recognise your judge you can name it and start choosing to diminsh its voice.  One of the ways to work with your judge is to stop looking at experiences as good or bad, they are simply just opportunities to learn. When you then notice yourself referring to anyone or anything as good or bad, you know your judge is at it and you can chose to put it in the corner. When it revs up the judging of yourself, and you notice it, you can approach it with a light heart and say “oh there goes the judge again” or something similar. If you see it as a part of you, but from a different perspective then you are able to start diminishing the judges power and start building up a positive relationship with yourself.  The word you use, the thoughts you think and how you act will either feed or starve your judge. However, starving your judge by limiting your negative external sensory engagements is also very effective. It is all about external senses hygene; listening and watching things that inspire you, eating food that is healthy and delicious, surrounding yourself with lovely scents, etc. News, advertising, gossip, poor diets, etc. all contribute to the judge staying empowered. One trick I’ve used is when I walk around town to notice when I start judging people around me, I then employ what I like to call compassionate questioning. I will start asking myself question about what it was like for that person as a child, what experiences and trauma have they may have gone through in their lives. When I do that, of course without knowing any answers, I understand two things; I don’t know their story and they are just the same as me on the inside. That creates a connection and makes it impossible for the judge to take up any space, it is dismissed to the corner. It comes down to changing your internal and external narrative.   Remember that the judge is a part of you, so this process is not about getting rid of your judge, but to diminish its power over you and to make it lose its voice. It is part of you and has been there to protect you from the time it was formed, so be grateful, but also know that it has done its service. When you have those emotions come up, do not dismiss them as being the judge, they are results of the judge, not it itself, allow and acknowledge them, giving the space to move through you and dissapate out from you. Check out the previous episode diving deeper in to this topic; “Triggers”.  Holding on to judgement perpetuates shame and guilt, so get to know your judge and let it know who is in charge. Move forward with compassion and acceptance and notice the joy that moves into your life.  Support this podcast

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Jul 16

1 hr

Don't waste a good trigger“Everything you do is triggered by either desire or fear.” – Brian TraceyIn life we are all triggered. Triggers are far more complex than I have space in this article to go into, but in line with my coaching practice I seek to boil concepts down to their bare essentials. In my experience the sequence of events within us is: trigger -> (stress) response -> fear -> validating experiences from the past -> Original Sensitising Event (OSE). The OSE is where we experienced the fear in that form the very first time, it was then created as a defence mechanism and was there to support us. However, it was never supposed to get stuck within us, but, nevertheless, it does. Why does it get stuck within us? In my experience, we hold on to these “defences” because we think they help us, but we make a blanket choice for all fear driven emotions; we suppress them and cling to them. This then causes us to bring back the emotion, time and time again as we have experiences that trigger that defence mechanism/fear to protect us. Our response then is from the aspect of the emotion and the prevailing thought process triggering a stress response, causing us to act out of alignement with our authenticity. To use a Rogerian term; we are incongruent (Carl Rogers, 1902 – 1987). We act from the external locus of evaluation of ourselves, i.e. we look to the outside for a cause of our state of being from the point of how others view us. As we explore the process further, understanding the difference between feelings and emotions are important: Feeling: “1. a self-contained phenomenal experience. Feelings are subjective, evaluative, and independent of the sensations, thoughts, or images evoking them. They are inevitably evaluated as pleasant or unpleasant, but they can have more specific intrapsychic qualities, so that, for example, the https://dictionary.apa.org/affective-tone (affective tone) of fear is experienced as different from that of anger. The core characteristic that differentiates feelings from cognitive, sensory, or perceptual intrapsychic experiences is the link of https://dictionary.apa.org/affect (affect) to https://dictionary.apa.org/appraisal (appraisal). Feelings differ from https://dictionary.apa.org/emotions (emotions) in being purely mental, whereas emotions are designed to engage with the world.2. any experienced sensation, particularly a tactile or temperature sensation (e.g., pain, coldness).”  Emotion: “n. a complex reaction pattern, involving experiential, behavioral, and physiological elements, by which an individual attempts to deal with a personally significant matter or event. The specific quality of the emotion (e.g., fear, shame) is determined by the specific significance of the event. For example, if the significance involves threat, fear is likely to be generated; if the significance involves disapproval from another, shame is likely to be generated. Emotion typically involves feeling but differs from feeling in having an overt or implicit engagement with the world. —emotional adj.”In terms of the thought then, it precedes the feeling, but follows the emotion. This is a very important distinction since we can only control three things; our thoughts, our words, and our actions. Also, external triggers usually activate an emotion that then gives rise to the thought process that perpetuates the trigger response. Internal triggers usually activate our feelings that then triggers the emotional response. By this way of reasoning, we can use the control of our thought process to direct our feelings and emotions. But, how do we control our thoughts when we are embroiled in an emotional upheaval generated from a trigger? Below are a few tools to get started with.  Practice to observe your experiences from your awareness. Realise we have a choice about our thoughts, words and actions. Accept emotions as a key aspect of your human Support this podcast

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Jul 9

1 hr 8 min

Show up as a role model to engage“We did not arrive on this planet to lead a cheerful carnival parade into the perfect New Eart Paradise. There is much work to be done before anyone will enter that promised land.” -Anton St. MaartenWhether you awaken to your own spirituality, your need to take care of your mind and body, right the wrongs in society, save animals, reform businesses, etc., you most probalby find a yearning to share your discoveries, and doing so quite enthusiastcally. However, we tend to come up against unexpected resitance, since, “Why would people not want to change for the better as I have???”. After a while we come away a bit deflated and demoralised, searching for those who understand us. We seek out others who have seen the same light we have. When we find our “home” we feel safe, secure and comforted. It is a place where we can recharge and recover and learn from others on the same path as ourselves. The challenge now is that we have ended up in an echo chamber and we have confirmation bias all around us. We are a light among other lights. However, as St Maarten is quoted, “There is much work to be done…”, and the work is not done with people who already agree with us. In order for our lights to shine, they need to be in the dark to help ligh it up. That is to say, we need to be among those that need the wisdome we hold, however much they may resist it. We are there to build bridges and create understanding and connection. We also, hopefully, learn along the way that our early exhuberance can come across as preachy and overbearing, which has the opposite effect that we are seeking. Also, it is not necessarily for everybody to go into the darkest of the darkness, but perhaps stay where there is some dim light and any light would amplify what is already there. We all have our purposes.  On my journey, I have come to understand that the best way to engage others is to show up as a rolemodel and to share my story. Those that feel compelled will then engage to learn more, those that don’t resonate with it, they are free to disengage without feeling they had been put upon. It is when we engage in these discussions that we learn more than we ever would in the echo chamber. Though, remember the echo chamber is where we go to recover and to share wisdom, which is why engaging with those that may not agree with us is important.  Being able to experience either side of the spectrum of light and darkness will allow us to experience ourself and bring our individual unique perspectives on whatever is our “light” to allow it to evolve, grow and shift, and we with it.  Support this podcast

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Jul 2

1 hr 14 min

“I was never aware of any other option but to question everything.” – Noam ChomskyWhen we make absolute statements about our notion of truth, we close the door to our autenthicity. The only way for us to evolve and self-actualise is to continously question our words, our thoughts and our actions. As you can read in my article “https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/the-paradox-of-truth-will-set-you-free/ (The Paradox of Truth Will Set You Free)“, truth is not static, it is your perception of your experiences, based on your perception of your past experiences. As we move through life and, hopefully, become more aligned with our authenticity our perception of the truth, i.e. our beliefs, will change. This change happens through having the courage to question everything. We arrive at our individual points in life where we begin questioning with our own individual set of programming and conditioning. However, it is then when we realise that the sets of beliefs and “rules” that we operate under didn’t derive from us, they came from external sources; religion, politics, family, friends, communities, etc. We start becoming aware of our own autenthicity and recognise that there is a stark incongruency there. Even though we are not fully aware of our autenthicity, it is the innate knowing what we are NOT, that leads us to know who we are.  This “re-programming” takes time as often our conditioning sits deep within our subconscious, and perhaps even embedded in our core woundings. These aspects of ourselves aren’t going to relinquish their power just because we now are starting to ask questions and become more aware of ourselves. Questioning typically leads to a lot of upheaval and overwhelm to begin with as there are those internal struggles going on, but know that if you allow and trust, you will settle into it and your awarness will start to take command over your existence.  There will be a lot of judgment surfacing, but as long as you take a compassionate view of your experiences and your process, you will solve this without delay. Two big traps, in my experience, are; skepticism and judging experiences good or bad. The questioning is there to open up our awareness to the multifaceted possibilities of our expereiences, not to become suspicious of everything. We can ask a question because we want to expand into understanding, or we can ask it because we want to prove ourself right, do you see the difference? We want to question our motivations so that we don’t end up in rightousness, but keep oursleves in openness, acceptance and allowance. If we judge our answers, that we come up with, as good or bad, we end up polarising our experience, rather than accepting the answer to be what it is for the time being. Anything else and we end up in the judment spiral and we are back “asleep”. When you open your heart and mind to allowing your beliefs to be challenged by yourself and others, without becoming triggered. If you do get triggered, that is a perfect time to reflect on the cause of it. You will have heard me say “don’t waste a good trigger” more than once, if you have heard me speak on a variety of topics.  As you may have summised already, asking questions takes courage, patience and an open heart and mind. The main thing, though, is that you start questioning everything; that is when the rest of your life starts. Support this podcast

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Jun 25

1 hr 2 min

Show up as the Best version of yourselfBravery is the choice to show up and listen to another person, be it aloved one or perceiv3ed foe, even when it is uncomfortable, painful, or the last thing you want to do.” – Alaric HutchinsonWhy do we have conflict? Why can’t people just get along? Essentially, we show up in our experiences with clinging to our stories, so, whether it is on a global, national or personal scale, we are determined to protect something. This something can be money, resources, people, pride, honour, etc. What we are trying to protect are, in fact, illusions. We should be more concerned with protecting out connection to others. Those too are impermanent, but they provide for a richer and more pleasant experience. How we show up in any conflict situation is very much dependent on our programming and conditioning, i.e. our experiences. These will determine the mix of your assertiveness and prioritising the relationship. If we are purely assertive with no regard for the relationship we are perceived as agressive and, on the flipside, if we aren’t assertive, but only want to protect the relationship, we are seen as a pushover. I think you will agree that neither of these conflict personality types will lead to any sort of success in the long term.  Defensiveness comes out of only being interested in our protecting our own illusion and stories. We tend to be triggered when we are up against a perceived threat. If we can develop self awarenss and being fully observant and conscious of ourselves when we are triggered, then we can also work on those triggers and solve our core wounds. We are only triggered when we have a programme to activate that resonates with the external experience. So, logically, if we clear all the trigger points, we have nothing to be in conflict about, right? Yes, unless you take on new programming to run triggers against, that is correct. However, we don’t need to clear all the trigger points before we can show up consciously in conflict, we just have to be aware of ourselves and observe our experience.  If we can observe the trigger, we can do something about it and we can choose to not act from the perspective of the emotion, and we can choose the thoughts that we have relating to the conflict, i.e. we don’t need to think “I better go on the offensive here, we are under attack!”, we can think “Why am I reacting this way to this person expressing their opnion. I know it has nothing to with me, it is all to do with the other person’s conditioning.”. It’s not about defusing the situation, it is about defusing yourself. The tools I use in every experienct are: Don’t take anything personally (from The Four Agreements) Don’t make assumptions (from The Four Agreements) Do your best (from The Four Agreements) Use your words impeccably (from The Four Agreements) Show compassion to yourself and others Accept your path and the paths of others and accept them as separate from each other’s Forgive yourself and others, forgiveness is a gift to you, not to others Find the lesson about yourself in every situation and experience. Using these tools you can take the next step of seeking to connect with others and seek solutions to the problems and conflicts. With the right mindset there are solutions to all the problems in the world. If we drop our need to cling to our stories and show up as role models and the best versions of ourselves, there isn’t anything we couldn’t overcome. Just don’t make the mistake of expecting others to take the first step, or to ever find it within them to show up in this way, as long as you do it, that is good enough. We don’t need to pick up the challenges put down by others, that is our choice.  Support this podcast

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Jun 18

1 hr 18 min

"Be like water making its way through cracks. Don't be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves." - Bruce LeeFlow is a state of mind and an experience where we are in full alignment with our authentic selves, our passion and purpose. It is a perspective of life where we perceive challenges from a perspective of acceptance and they are no longer unsurmountable obstacles.  Flow does evade most of us; why is that? To answer that, let's look at the stages of how to actually move into the state of flow. Set clear goals and have clear visions, and know why you want to get there. Allow life to happen for you, not to you. Align yourself with your true essence and autenthicity.  Show up as a role model to be the change you want to see in your life. If you don't know what you want out of life you are unlikely going to be able to tap into you your passion. Passion is the fuel that propels the flow state. Many of us just get on with our "good" jobs and hope to be happy one day. In order to connect with one's passion one has to make active and brave choices.  When we resist challenges in life and keep telling our victim stories, we keep ourselves low in vibration. We have an attitude of "life is happening to me". When we choose to accept what life has to give us in whatever experiences we have, we can reveal the gifts that they have for you. This is when we allow life to happen for us and we can write our hero's story. Our frequency can then be maintained at a level where we can allow flow to come in to our lives.  Carl Rogers said that it is in our innate nature to create congruency between our true essence (ideal self) and self-image. So when we are out of alignment between who we think we are and who we truly are, we keep busy trying to align them without realising it. Hence, we don't consciously realise that we are not in alignement and don't understand where you energy is being directed.  The biggest challenge to holding your vibrations high, apart from not doing the work on your core wounds, is energetic pollution in our surroundings. When we do our work on ourselves and show up as role models, we attract people that we resonate with and are able to let go of the ones we don't. People will also look at you and want to emulate that flow that you are in, feeding your own flow at the same time.  Moving into flow is rarely an instantaneous shift, but, rather, a gradual one over time. If you were to drill down into each of these points further, you will notice there are underlying practices and concepts to consider. We do have to put in the work and have patience and then one day, out of the blue, we will find ourselves in flow.  The path might be winding and trying, but the rewards along the way are plentiful and well worth it. So, ask yourself the question, "Am I living with full purpose and passion in every aspect of my life?". If the answer is no, you have have some choices to make. Good luck! Photo by https://unsplash.com/@kazuend?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText (kazuend) on https://unsplash.com/s/photos/flow?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText (Unsplash) During the summer of 2021 we are launching a flow training course calle "Thrival Flow". If you would like to find out more and sign up to get our announcements, https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/thrival-flow/ (click here.) Support this podcast

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Jun 11

1 hr 9 min

“Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaingful life” – Dr Susan DavidMost of us are conditioned to, “suck it up”, “keep your chin up”, “this to shall pass”, etc. Our conditioning from childhood dissallows us from experiencing the challenges of life and the emotions that come with that. Since we learn this from our earliest ages, we then bring that to our own children, and thusly we perpetuate this forced false positivity.  Toxic positivity is essentially where we pretend everything is ok, when, in fact, it isn’t. Doesn’t this contravene all the wonderful anecdotal evidence we have for the efficacy of affirmations, positive visualisations, gratitude practices, etc. , you may ask? What about the practice of finding gifts (positivity) in every situation I promote myself? It is a fine line, very fine line I grant you. However, the key difference is what you do with those emotions when they come up to be noticed and acknowledge. Toxic positivity is a masking practice when you have uncomfortable emotions come up, rather than the aforementioned mindset change practices. These practices you exercise whenever you can, but when that emotion comes up, you give it your full attention without judgement, critisism nor analysis. You basically manage your thought processes that engage with any given emotion, while allowing the emotion the space it needs to express itself.  Toxic positivity, at its source, has less to do with you not wanting to experience the discomfort of emotions, than people around you being uncomfortable with you experiencing it. It is that external discomfort that conditions us to surpress and dismiss our emotions. We force our positivity on others when we are uncomfortable with their discomfort or perhaps thinking we have no time to sit with them to give them our support with our presence. Part of that problem is that we don’t recognise the fact that we can feel their emotions as our own and if we have the self-awareness to differentiate between our own emotions and feelings and those of others, we can easily remove what doesn’t belong to us and fully and unconditionally hold space in peace with the person who is suffering. As an intuitive empath, I suffered greatly from this until I learned to manage the energies within my energetic body, and as a coach I work with these energies to be fully present and supportive of my clients. We can all learn it, but because it is not considered hard science, most ignore it and perpetuate their own toxic positivity. If you want to try for yourself, start, in meditation, by learning to observe your own experiences from the perspective of your awareness. Notice emotions, feelings, and sensations. Observe them without attaching to them, allow them to reveal themselves to you. They will communicate with you their shape, colour, name, density, texture, etc. They are there as a means for your body to communicate with you as the consciousness that there is something going on that needs your attention. When you become more adept at this practice you can ask the emotion, feeling or sensation, “Do you belong to me?”, if it doesn’t, you can gently ask that it leaves. However, if it does belong to you, you follow the practice above. Here is a link to a guided “https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/product/guided-meditation-body-communication/ (Body Communication Meditation)” that you can start with. Imagine if we all develop these skills and allow our near and dear to evolve their emotional intelligence, not to mention our own, where would be as a species? How would it be if we trusted our compass as opposed to the map? The challenge is that we are poorly resourced to deal with our own crap, so how can we be expected to hold space for others when they are going through their own? Perhaps you can be part of the solution and take your responsibility to resource yourself to be the rock that someone needs to become a rock themselves for others to lean on.  I believe in... Support this podcast

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Jun 4

1 hr 8 min

“Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time.” – Maya AngelouAs the magnificient and wise Maya points out, trust requires courage. In our lives as we go through experience after experience, we are conditioned to learn about our external environment, not about how we react to stimuli in that environment. In doing so, we end up building our parameters of trust around what we have learned about others and the experiences we have had with them. The challenges with that are twofold; your external environment and stimuli change and you can’t control anything external to you. In effect you build your framework on trust on an illusionary house of cards that is inherently instable.  When we realise this falsehood of trust we then turn within ourselves to find what we can trust there. The challenge is that the external locust of evaluation conditioning that we arrive at this point with makes it very hard to trust anything that is not fed by our external senses, i.e. if I can’t hear it, taste it, see it, smell it, feel it or think it, I cannot trust it. We end up in a catch-22 because we need out trust validated before we can trust, but our trust won’t be validated until we actually do trust.  The trust I apply is internal. I trust my intuition, my internal senses and my internal guidance, in my case that is my higher self and my guides. When you trust yourself you can trust how you engage with your external environment and it doesn’t matter how others act, they are of no concern to you. If I end up in a challenging situation and my intuition guided me there, I trust I am there to learn a valuable lesson about myself or there is an outcome that is for my highest good, or perhaps I am in that situation to provide someone else with key lesson for their journey in life. Whatever the situation I can trust, unconditionally, that it is for the highest good of all involved.  Trust takes courage, but if you are doing “the work” and evolving as an awareness, your courage will expand and so will your ability to trust unconditionally. The Universe has your back, I promise.  Support this podcast

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May 28

1 hr

Nolan Pillay is born and bred in South Africa. Everyting was stacked against Nolan from the start. He grew up in a township and as being black, apartheid had it written in law that he should not succeed. As if those challenges weren't enough he had himself to battle as well. Listen to Nolan tell his story about obstacles, seemingly unsurmountable, his work to overcome them and using his hero's version of events to empower others to reach beyond their limiting beliefs and step into their greatness. Nolan's gentle and humble energy is magnetic, so he is a man in the right place at the right time. You can find him at https://straighttalkwithnolan.com/ (https://straighttalkwithnolan.com/). Support this podcast

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May 21

1 hr 5 min

"For to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others." - Nelson ManelaMost of us in the world take freedom as a pillar of our existence. However, externally there are many who are not fully free, such as people in North Korea, China and prisoners. There certainly are other countries where freedoms are curtailed, but they would be too numerous to list here. The spectrum of collective freedom, going from absolutely curtailed to absolutely unlimited. The latter is an oxymoron because with absolutely unlimited collective freedom, individual freedoms will be curtailed to one level or another, depending on the perspective of the individuals. In today's divisive environment, the debate between individual vs. collective freedom is raging. Freedom is another one of these paradoxes that we have to experience from every conceivable perspective to understand. My idea of freedom is going to be different from everyone else's.  When we consider freedom, we look at, choice, thought, expression and action (to a limited extent). It is when individual perspectives of these come at odds with the collective, and we resist considering all perspectives, that we experience division. It is the perpetual question which should take priority, personal or collective freedom. Which do you think should take priority, if any?  Have you ever thought about freedom as a feeling that you have inside, available to you at any time? Society and politicians will tell you that they are fighting for your freedom, which, I am sorry to tell you, is an illusion. They are fighting for you to think you are free to maintain the status quo, because anything else is change and is threatening to them. Nelson Mandela's epiphany came when he was imprisoned for 26 years, that freedom is not something you experience through external stimuli, it is an internal experience. No one can limit what you think and how you feel. They can try to alter your thought patterns and break you down mentally and emotionally, but at the end of the day it is your choice to letting someone do this to you. However, hard that choice might be, it is, nonetheless, a choice.  When we feel free we are free. However, once you feel free you will start to understand how society is tricking everybody to feel free by redirection of their attention, while holding them back from their true freedom, and that can be a shocking realisation indeed. So, what is true freedom, do we have a responsibility to give up our individual freedom for the sake of the collective, or is it the collective's responsibility to respect the individual's right to his/her own expression of freedom? I will leave that up to you to decide.  Support this podcast

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May 14

1 hr 11 min

All for one, and one for all. United we stand, divided we fall." - Alexander Dumas "The Three Musketeers"We are living in a time of great polarisations. Politicians are flagrantly fanning the flames of fear and the chasms of division in society, and the media is perpetuating the messaging under the guise of "reporting the news". Everybody is blaming everybody else, and round we go. So, who actually bears the responsibility for this calamity? There is a two step answer to that question and it is the collective consciousness, that then comes down to our individual responsibility.  The causes on an individual basis are many, but the main culprit is our attachment to fear (you can find out more about fear in our podcast titled https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/fear-podcast/ ("Fear")). Some of the fuel of division that perpetuates our attachment to fear are: Judgement Distrust Disconnect Lacking self-awareness Blame culture Disillusion with concept of control As you may notice, the fuel of division is external to ourselves and only "allows" us to view others on a surface level.  The solution is, as many other times, to reflect inwards and see other at a depth to connect with their true essence to realise our similarities as opposed to our differences. Some of the key remedies against fear are: Self-reflection Practicing compassion and kindness Knowing what you can and can't control and not worry about what you can't control Understanding your power of choice Realising that you are responsible as much as anyone else Desire to show up as a role model. If no desire to change exists then this information will not resonate with you. The process of change and starting to be able to incorporate these processes, begins with one or several questions; "Who am I?", "What is my purpose?", etc. Try it out.  The only way for the world to experience peace despite the perpetuation of division by religion, governments, politicians, businesses, etc. is for each of us to sit up and take notice and be the change we want to see and stop taking everything we are fed at face value, but to challenge our belief systems and the rules that we were given. Be a role model and plant seeds in the world for people to want to experience the peace that you experience.  Support this podcast

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May 7

1 hr 8 min

Being in the present moment and practicing non-resistance is a complex practice. When we look at life and all the paradoxes that exist, being present is only one of many, that are all interlaced, it gets very complicated from that perspective. In my practice I have found that boiling everything down to their bare essentials is helpful. When you are in a meditative state and have quieted your mind, you find yourself very much in the present moment; time and space all but dissolve. As long as you perpetuate your stories and the values of your present moments on your past and future experiences, you are unable to live in the present moment. The solution is then to make peace with your past and future and be content in your present moment. A little tip for the wakened state, if you feel that you aren't in present; take an organic material, like a piece of fruit or veggie or a plant, study it carefully using all your senses and you will soon find yourself in your present moment. The challenge is of course, from the "normal" perception, to be present and content, while having dreams and desires and to manifest them. The beauty is that when you are truly present you find yourself in flow and the paradox of wanting while being fully content makes perfect sense. It is a practice. These are some of the concepts we work with in our coaching work shop. If you would like to engage us to explore these topics as how they pertain to you, please visit www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk to book your 30 minute free consultation (bottom right corner of your browser window). Barbie can be reached through her website: http://www.youareamazing.online/ (www.youareamazing.online) Support this podcast

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Apr 30

59 min 35 sec

"What you stay focused on will grow" - Roy T. BennettLaw of Attraction is the concept that you attract what you hold in your mind. However, that is only part of the story. It is like paining a painting without any passion or feeling, no one will buy it, it lacks that something extra. The same goes for visualisation, if you don't add the feeling, there is no value. Law of Attraction is considered one of the Universal Laws, similar to the Laws of Physics, but for metaphysics.  The idea is that if you can see it in your mind you can manifest it. The problem is that the universe does not run a imagery facsimile service, it responds to the feeling that imagination gives you.  The visualisation is important to give an idea of what gives you that feeling. When you visualise what you want, you Reticular Activation System (RAS) kicks in. It is the part of the brain that lets the rest of you know that something is important and you then start noticing that everywhere. If you have visualised yourself on the beach for your holidays, you will start noticing adverts, news reports, etc about beach holidays, your RAS has told you it is important and thus you need to notice it.  The Universe serves up opportunities to feel more of what you feel in the present moment, so the visualisation allows you to evoke the feeling you want to feel in the future, in the present moment. So, essentially, you bring the future in to your present moment because you are already feeling the way you want to feel in the future. The trick here is to stay open to the opportunities and not be attached to the visualised outcome, remember, it is the feeling we are after, not the material manifestation. If we remain open to the opportunities, we remain open to receiving something even better that we couldn't even have thought of, but the Universe did in its infinite wisdom.  We do have to take into account our multidimensionality; who is it that holds what desire. There are many different aspects to you and parts of yourself can have conflicting desires and hold limiting beliefs about your ability to receive. If you are incongruent in this way your ability to manifest experiences you desire in your life is going to be limited. Being self-aware and working on your baggage will give you a far better chance to successfully manifest your dreams. Do the work and reap the rewards.  Support this podcast

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Apr 23

1 hr 16 min

"Get yourself grounded and you can navigate even the stormiest roads in peace." - Steve GoodierGrounding, aka earthing, is a practice of putting your skin in direct contact with the earth, or through earthing products in your house. Some forms that you may be familiar are the Japanese practice of "forest bathing" or the increasingly popular practices of natural water swimming. When we feel "ungrounded" we can experience dizziness, anxiety, depression, feelings of not belonging, etc. So, mentally, it has immediate impacts to no be grounded. However, it has been found that physiologically it has equally profound impacts.  Emerging evidence shows that contact with the Earth—whether being outside barefoot or indoors connected to grounded conductive systems—may be a simple, natural, and yet profoundly effective environmental strategy against chronic stress, ANS dysfunction, inflammation, pain, poor sleep, disturbed HRV, hypercoagulable blood, and many common health disorders, including cardiovascular disease. - Chevalier, Sinatra, et al (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3265077/ (link to study))Earth, in this discussion, can be seen as a huge battery and there is opposite energy in the atmosphere that keeps charging up everything that is not connected to earth. So if you are disconnected from earth by walking around in shoes with rubber soles, your body will continuously take on more and more of this charge with no outlet for it, until it eventually becomes overwhelming for your body and mind. For the same reasons you wouldn't run you household electronics without having them grounded, it is as important for us to ground as it is for us to have sunshine, air, water, food, etc. As soon as you connect yourself to the earth with your bare skin you are able to discharge any excess energy into the earth and hold the same charge as the earth.  Studies have shown that rather quickly after grounding (4 nights of sleeping on a grounding pad), reductions in inflammations and red blood cells clumping can be seen. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4378297/ (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4378297/) It stands to question, if the emergence and introduction of rubber into our lives and our footwear isn't a major factor in the increase in chronic degenerative diseases during the 20th century. In fact they have overtaken infectious diseases as the #1 cause of death among humans. Of course, vaccines, improved diagnostics, treatments, etc. do play the main role here, but could we have a very simple solution to many of these diseases.  It is known that our "modern" lifestyles with stress, fast food, indoor living, insulation, isolation, etc., impacts our mental, spiritual and physical health. The importance of green zones in the planning and construction of our urban areas is age old. However, could it be that, even though we understand it's importance, we do not grasp their function and how to use them, and why?  As societies, our understanding of grounding, why it is important and how to incorporate it as a practice in our lives, must improve. We can achieve this by incorporating the understanding in government policies relating to healthcare, education, construction, etc. Allow children run around barefoot in school and convey to them why it is beneficial to do so. Make sure physicians and mental health professionals understand the benefits, so that they may prescribe grounding to their patients, both as a treatment and preventative therapy. Incorporate grounding into our buildings, so that we can easily ground ourselves when we are unable to go outside. There are many ways to bring this solution to the population without any real cost to society; the benefits far outweigh the investment.  For us as individuals we can: Spend most of our time barefoot Use visualisations Meditate Forest bathing Gardening Spend time in nature Natural water bathing Epsom salt baths... Support this podcast

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Apr 16

58 min 3 sec

"Angry people are not always wise" - Jane Austin "Pride and Prejudice"Psychology researchers are pretty much split down the middle as to whether anger is an emotion or an expression of an emotion. I subscribe to that anger is an expression of emotion just like laughter is. However, I see it as the underlying negative emotion transforms into anger if we lack the emotional intelligence to identify and and consciously express the original negative emotion. So it becomes a "catch-all" for any negative emotion we cannot name.  Because of this, anger is not something you can control once it appears in your body. So the idea of anger management is an illusion, as you will see. The are many studies to support the evidence that suppression of anger is also very bad for our physical and mental health https://openaccesspub.org/ijpr/article/999 (https://openaccesspub.org/ijpr/article/999).  When we experience anger it is the expression of it we want to be able to control so that we don't say or do anything that we will regret, i.e. when we allow the anger to take us over. There will always be an underlying fear that evokes the anger to protect ourselves. You may want to go back and also check out our discussion about https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/fear-podcast/ (Fear). Whether it is the thought that evokes the emotion or if it is externally provoked causing the thoughts to come up, it doesn't matter, thoughts will be swirling and giving energy to the anger, and thus perpetuating it. As a remedy it is popular to count to 10 and breath, which actually helps. The reason is because you are being present and just observing, you are not feeding the anger with your thoughts it has nothing to hold it in your body.  The ability to "manage" your anger lies in the work you put in before you get angry, by training yourself to become present and to always observe your experiences from your awareness, as opposed from your conscious mind. When you do that then you can observe the emotion, and perhaps familiarise yourself with it, see it become anger and not engage with it. You can then also observe your thoughts, and your thoughts you can control and choose what to think. Some of the practices I use to be able to express my negative emotions or anger in a healthy constructive way: meditation not taking anything personally not assuming I know what goes on in another's life passing my words and thoughts through the filters is it true, kind and helpful knowing and trusting my boundaries and being able to express them in a conscious manner approaching myself and others with compassion, acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude knowing how I want to feel after the negative emotion has dissipated  In the podcast I tell the story of Henry VIII and the New Forest down in the south of England. In 1483 the "New Forest Act" was passed to support the build up of the Royal Navy. However, he knew that it was going to take a long time to produce the timber to really see the fruits of his commission. However, it is this idea of preparation I would like you take with you, because when you find yourself in a fit of rage, you have already lost. Practice and preparation is the solution to dealing with anger and negative emotions in general.  Support this podcast

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Apr 9

1 hr 19 min

Ken Bechtel consciously didn't know what was awaken within him when he was asked, and complied, to officiate the wedding of a couple of friends in the playground as a child. As for so many of us he resisted his calling for as long as possible until he ran out of excuses. Today Ken is a highly acclaimed relationship mentor who helps people that are challenged by relationships to become better partners and help their partners to do the same. His typical clients have had forays into relationships already. As he describes, the younger generations are convinced they have it all figured out, i.e. they have to make their own attempts first before seeking advice. We discussed how we can help improve the relationship skills of humanity before they get in to their relationships. Ken feels that working with parents to be the best parents and partners they can be, children will see how it is done and will try to emulate what they've seen, i.e. kids don't do as you say, they do as you do. So, showing up as role models is the best way to perpetuate healthy relationship behaviours. Ken used the metaphor of the rose many times in our discussion and it is very appropriate for many situations. From the nourishment of the rose to it's bloom, the idea of the rose knowing its worth, the beauty of the rose distracting from the thorns, etc. Relationships take work from all parties and there is no "one-size-fits-all" type of relationship. However, we were in agreement that being self aware and dong "the work" on oneself and showing up with the approach of compassion, acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude is a great platform to start from. Of course, both partners would benefit from committing to the same platform. From this, believing one's own lovability and ability to hear and willingness to engage and solve, will come natural and be an organic evolution of self. If you want to work on your relationships, you can contact Ken at www.kenbechtel.com. Support this podcast

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Apr 2

1 hr 52 min

As we delve back in to the concept of Spiritual Bypass, we share some stories of our own experience with it. We can all agree that in order to do one's own "work", we need to develop a keen sense of self-awareness and being in constant observation of one's own experiences. Eckart Tolle describes the process of learning to observe oneself beautifully in the his ground breaking book "The Power of Now"; a must read for anyone serious about evolving. The more you observe yourself and start making conscious choices about the three things you can control; your words, your thoughts and your actions, the more you are going to start trusting your authentic self as it is now allowed to reveal itself. You go from living in your external experiences to observing your experiences from an internal awareness perspective. This process allows us to get connected with the world we live on/in and the living beings around us. This leads to less judgement and more compassion. Being fully connected with your authenticity gives you a direct insight to the motivation for your words, thoughts and actions. And it is here that we start bringing our authentic selves or original essence in to full expression in our physical reality. It is when we are unaware of the incongruency between our expression of self and our authentic selves that we experience spiritual bypass. The key to steering clear of spiritual bypass is to observe one's experiences from one's awareness and constantly question and discover our motivation for the things we think, say and do. Our motivation will be the clue to if we are expressing our authentic self or our conscious mind, i.e. ego. So, check your motivation and you will be fine. Support this podcast

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Mar 26

1 hr

"Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like." - Lao TzuWe do not control anything but our thoughts, our words and our actions, yet we are insistent on controlling our external experiences. Like a river that doesn't control the path it takes, nor does it stop when ever there it are obstacles in its way, it flows where it is meant to flow. Life is the same process of flow. When we live life by resisting our experiences, either by taking action that is based on our learned behaviours or simply refusing to take action when we are supposed to, we stagnate and make life a matter of hardship.  Resistance is essentially when we avoid the lesson we are supposed to learn from an experience. One can resist by taking "wrong" action, or by doing nothing at all, thus hoping that the experience disappears. When we take "wrong" action we tend to act on impulse, from our emotions and only using information from our external world as a basis of action. When we act from a perspective of our conscious mind, thus acting from any emotion that appears, we perceive what is in front of us through the lens of our past experiences. When we do that we repeat the resistance of our past experiences, thus perpetuating the resistance and suffering in our lives. We try to manipulate our experiences towards the perceived desired outcome. How brazen we are operating under the illusion that we have the mental capacity to assess the infinite numbers of inputs into every experience. The truth is, we simply do not have the conscious intelligence to do that.  In society we can observe protagonist and antagonists that act with judgement from an emotional perspective. When we omit compassion from our actions we perpetuate the situation we are trying to solve. Division is resistance. Bring your mind to such prominent figures as Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King and The Dalai Lama, they all stand or stood up for something, without resistance, they accepted their path and all the experiences that came out of it. Taking right action is rarely the easy choice as it often contravenes the path that would be logical based on the information you have in front of you (remember, you perceive it through the lens of your past experiences). However, our intuition accesses computing power that is infinite and can assess all aspects of our experiences from every point of view and feed us the path of flow. Just because a path is paved with suffering, does not mean it is the wrong path, and it is not for us to concern ourselves with how we are flowing through it but why we are in the experience and what we are to learn from it. Flow can also cause reactions from others, and it is up to each and everyone of us to take the right action in every one of those experiences within experiences to make sure we act from a perspective of compassion.  When we are able to take right action by using our discernment and listening to our intuition we enter a state of flow. When we are in a state of flow we know exactly what action and when to take it, and equally important, when to do absolutely nothing. Another important aspect of understanding our actions is to ascertain our motivation. Often our actions might be motivated by power, revenge, retribution, anxiety, or equally our inaction might be motivated by fear of conflict, lack of passion, depression, and so forth. The commonality among these examples and every other examples of "wrong" action is that they all have their sources in fear. However if you are motivated by compassion, acceptance and forgiveness, you are most probably motivated to right action. However, just make sure your right action isn't just a mask of a fear based belief.  The big obstacle for most trying to overcome resistance is trust. In order to flow with life we need to trust that we don't need... Support this podcast

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Mar 19

1 hr 13 min

As with all choices in life, we are individually responsible for the ones we make. Spiritual bypass is such a choice, however, not necessarily a conscious one. Often the choice is made in order for us to learn a very valuable lesson; what spiritual bypass is and how it feels and what to do to avoid it going forward. Below is a beautiful excerpt from an interview with John Welwood by Tina Fossella (http://www.johnwelwood.com/articles/TRIC_interview_uncut.pdf (full interview)): I noticed a widespread tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks. When we are spiritually bypassing, we often use the goal of awakening or liberation to rationalize what I call premature transcendence: trying to rise above the raw and messy side of our humanness before we have fully faced and made peace with it. And then we tend to use absolute truth to disparage or dismiss relative human needs, feelings, psychological problems, relational difficulties, and developmental deficits. I see this as an “occupational hazard” of the spiritual path, in that spirituality does involve a vision of going beyond our current karmic situation.We can experience this in different areas and different stages in life. In our every day life we use terms "high and mighty", "full of oneself", etc. These are good indicators that someone might be exercising one form or another of spiritual bypass.  We can recognise the pattern by observing our own thoughts, words and actions (the only elements we can control). If they are at anytime coming from a place fear, they will generate emotions that are low vibrational, such as, judgement, jealousy, bitterness, presumption, idealisation, vanity, etc. In severe cases they lead to megalomania or narcissism. Our triggers are also paramount in identifying our path of personal development. In our coaching practice we suggest to our clients to show gratitude for their triggers. Firstly, if you have a routine of immediately saying "thank you" when you are triggered, you interrupt the spiral of thoughts that will be generated by the state of fear the trigger awoke. Secondly, this allows you to then from a perspective of your awareness observe your thoughts and ask, "why am I thinking this way?", "Where did this thought pattern originate?". This, in turn, then opens the door to reveal the trail of breadcrumbs that lead back to the Original Sensitising Event (OSE) giving you an opportunity to work on and heal it. Working on your "baggage" is the opposite of spiritual bypass.  By accepting your triggers and that you are engaging in spiritual bypass are necessary steps in disengaging yourself from the destructive behaviour.  Whenever anyone proclaims to be the best or #1 of anything, unless there is a competitive or quantifiable basis for it, I take note and start asking questions. Also, if anyone claims to be the only source of any wisdom or healing, I stay away. Guru worship is a very common trap of spiritual bypass. I have come across many wonderful healers, mediums, psychics, spiritual sages, etc. on my journey and they have all been destined catalysts on it. However, they have not claimed to be the best or the only ones' of anything. They may state that they are supremely proficient at what they do, but without claiming the top alone. Actually, some of the most powerful healers and sages I have come across do not advertise extensively, they trust the universe to bring them the souls that they are meant to assist. This is not to say that advertising is bad, but it is what we claim in that messaging that can lead us down the path of spiritual bypass. At the end of the day, people's journeys cannot be collectivised, they are individual, and each and everyone of us have our own guru inside.  I believe part of our journey is to bring your pure essence, the innocence that you were born with, into physical... Support this podcast

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Mar 12

56 min 14 sec

You may reach Barbie Layton on www.youareamazing.online. Our societies, communities, religions, etc. dictate to us the ideal versions of men and women. However, these ideals are tens of thousands of years old. They did fulfil a purpose when we  were in groups and communities where assigning roles based on physical and mental abilities by gender made sense. Today we have evolved past that, but as always society is slow to catch up. We are still instilled with the programming that men should not show emotions or cry and women should not be tough and strong. It is very confusing because women complain when men aren't being sensitive enough or men complain when women are too sensitive, yet when a man is sensitive, then he's not tough enough, and when a woman is tough, she is too "manly".  It is equally important to recognise the roles we have chosen to play in our lifetimes, man or woman, depending on your choice, but equally important to recognise that we hold both female and male energy within ourselves. Finding the balance within that is authentically you is the goal. When we show up authentically and compassionately in balance we have an equal playing field to communicate and have civil discourse. Showing up and daring to be vulnerable is key.  When each and every one of us show up balanced we can start to overhaul this Alpha Type Hierarchical society that we have set up. When we are in balance the old system is not going to resonate any longer and the new paradigm will emerge organically and naturally without conflict. Without that internal balance we are going to continue to experience the immune response from within the system that resist change. It is an organismic response because our societies are not set up to deal well with change, it abhors it.  Trying to force our way through change without the energetic balance is causing men to not be male and women not to be feminine. This in of itself is causing the system to have an immune response, because it is out of whack. These imbalances also cause us to become confused, one manifestation is the seeking of release of sexual energies without connections, just fumbling in the dark for the solution. We also tend to seek out a partner to balance these energies, not realising they are intrinsic. This is always going to cause a relationship to be out of balance and doomed to fail. We must do our internal work in order to realise our optimal self that then resonates with another person in perfect balance and you then are in perfect harmony. We have this idea that our relationships are based on these static roles and the success metric is quantitative, not qualitative. Would it not be far better to be in balance and share a truly magical time with someone for the time that it is meant for you to be together and then realise, because you are in tune, if there is nothing further to be gained from the relationship? Do we rush in to these relationships, not only to satisfy and fill a void in our own balance, but also because of biological constraints and societal expectations? When a man thinks "I don't want to be retired by the time my child goes to college", does he then consider the fact that a) retirement is a choice, b) by the time he reaches "retirement age", he is likely to live another 20 years, by today's linear statistics, but is likely, with the technological advances, to be an additional 40 or 50 years. From the female perspective we come up against a more tangible challenge that a woman's fertility comes to an end at around 45 years of age. However, the ability to freeze eggs is very much accessible to the public, however at a significant expense. If we change our mindset and thinking and consider the tools and technologies available to us we can disallow current societal and physical challenges from achieving freedom to balance our energies. Bringing these types of freedoms into our relationships allows us gradually bring balance to our own... Support this podcast

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Mar 5

1 hr 16 min

Halima Ferreira was born in Africa and went to culinary school in South Africa. She calls the UK home and a base for now. She started her career working on cruise ships before starting to work more as a private chef. She has built up a very strong demand on her services among the super wealthy and royalty around the world. To an outsider the idea of working in exotic locations in beautiful palaces and being jetted around in private jet planes, and who could blame us. However, the pressures and levels of stress are immense and they are constant. Halima found herself struggling with her health, with some very critical culminations, but as with so many others, doctors did not have the answers that resonated with her. Her relationship with food lead her intuitively to look at her diet as the first root of her problems. This took her on a journey of discover of food as medicine. Halima, today, is developing concepts to teach people about food as medicine, teaching and coaching others to balance their diets as a lifestyle rather than intermittent harsh dieting. She runs bespoke online workshops/cook along, she develops recipes, setting up meal box deliveries, and anything else that will help spread her teachings about how we can relate to food in a healthy way and use food as a catalyst for healing. Halima's website is https://www.tailoredtaste.co.uk/ (https://www.tailoredtaste.co.uk/) where you can reach her to find out more about how she can help you. Neither Halima or I, Christopher, are medical professionals, so please do not construe any of the material in this podcast as being medical advice. Always consult your healthcare professional for advice relating to your health. Support this podcast

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Feb 26

1 hr 18 min

"Be grateful for what you already have while you pursue your goals. If you aren't grateful for what you already have, what makes you think you would be happy with more?" Roy T. Bennett "The Light in the Heart"Gratitude practice is in vogue at the moment, and rightly so, and it isn't a day too late. As a foundation for this interest are a plethora of studies that have been to ascertain the effect of practicing gratitude. When we receive a compliment, a gift or something else we can feel grateful for it, but it wears off quickly from your conscious mind, but it remains far longer in your "system". Studies show (here's an example: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_gratitude_changes_you_and_your_brain) that continuously practicing gratitude: Unshackles you from toxic emotions You find it to be an intrinsic experience without the need for external validation or contribution It requires patience It has a lasting effect I suggest to all my clients that when you wake up in the morning, take five or ten minutes just sitting on the side of your bed with your feet in the ground, and your hands on your chest, breathe and remind yourself of anything in your life you are grateful for. This has two purposes; you interrupt the Cortisol Awakening Response (CAR), that sets off just before you wake up, and is in actual fact what makes you wake up and can "jump out of bed". Cortisol is part of the physical stress response and has been shown to be very detrimental to our health when we produce too much off it. And it shifts your mind from your daily stresses (that are amplified by the CAR) to what you have that you can be grateful for. That is, your stress base level for the day is far lower than if you just "jump out of bed" or, even worse, check your phone immediately when you wake up (phones are banned from bedrooms in my house).  Gratitude as a practice is a form of CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) joined with visualisation therapy. It also engages your RAS (Reticular Activation System), the system that makes you notice things that you have put in your mind, e.g. if you have your eyes on a new car, you will suddenly start seeing that car everywhere, because you have told you subconscious that you are interested in it. So, by pure logic, we can see that the practice of gratitude helps shift your attention and mindset to finding what is positive in your life, and you embody it as you now start to evoke the emotion of gratitude.  "Those that don't believe in magic will never experience it" Roal DahlOnce you are a month or so into practicing gratitude, then magic starts to happen, well perhaps not quite magic, but it certainly feels like it. Most people employ journaling as their primary technique, but there are also: Affirmations Mantras Meditation CBT Visualisations If we constantly remind ourselves of all the things we have that we can be grateful for, we BECOME grateful and life becomes a constant gift that we love receiving. It is a process of building up the picture with all your internal senses with the support of your external ones to evoke the feeling of gratitude within you to create a fully integrated embodiment of gratitude within you.  I am grateful for you joining me on this journey, and I hope you enjoy the podcast.  Support this podcast

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Feb 19

52 min 7 sec

"Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule" - Siddhartha Gautama "The Dhammapada: The Sayings of the Buddha"Forgiveness is both a process and a result. However, forgiveness as a result is binary in nature; either you have forgiven or you have not. Our relationship with forgiveness and our misconceptions of it comes from our societal programming. We are raised to tell people we perpetrate against that we are sorry. What does that actually mean? We aren't told to ask for forgiveness, we are not taught how to repent nor are we taught how to forgive others, whether they seek our forgiveness or not. It is not very surprising though as most of our moral standards come from our religious backgrounds. Religions take on forgiveness is contradictory at best. The bible tells us on one hand "an eye for an eye" and on the other "to turn our other cheek". The Quran is no better; here we are told that we shan't harm the creations of God, but on the other hand wage war against those that offend him. Our prison system also focuses on punishment not on reform, which is because society does not understand what it means to forgive. We are brought up to be vengeful. No wonder we are confused as to what forgiveness is and how to do it.  I would therefore venture to state that our confusion relating to forgiveness is based in ancestral and cultural karma that we keep perpetuating. This confusion causes us to, unnecessarily, hold on to bitterness, anger, hurt, guilt, shame, etc. We have a need to show others how they've hurt us by holding on to it, thus only perpetuating our own hurt. It is hard for us to let go. Often times we have left a part of ourselves in the experience that we find hard to forgive. We essentially use our conscious mind as an anchor to hold on to these hurts in the illusion that by committing them to our memories we will be protected from similar situations in the future. This is, however, a contradiction because whatever you hold on to will resonate from you and thus will attract those experiences again.  "The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong." - Mahatma GandhiForgiveness does take strength, strength to, with your awareness, overcome and supersede your conscious and subconscious minds. The good news, being strong or weak is a matter of choice, one may just not have awoken to it yet.  The processLeading up to forgiveness, we develop and embody compassion and acceptance towards ourselves, our experiences and those that are participants in our experiences. Along that path we also work on our boundaries. However, once you have love and compassion for yourself and others and accept your experiences and the path of others, boundaries tend come quite naturally as you have a greater understanding of yourself and your journey. Forgiveness as a process often requires a great deal of patience. Some experiences click in no time and you immediately see the gifts from it and can forgive, other experiences you need to revisit and view from every conceivable perspective to gain the understanding to achieve forgiveness.  These perspectives do include your own choices and involvement in the experience. It is critically important that you remember to forgive yourself, even if you were the one who was the victim in the experience. You are the constant through every experience in your life and your choices lead up to and through every experience, so you must include yourself in the forgiveness process, for whatever choices and actions you took or, for that matter, didn't take.  You may at this point have gathered that forgiveness is not an external process needing the involvement of anybody else but you. Forgiveness is an internal process. However, you may choose to involve others in the process, as in expressing your forgiveness or inviting someone to forgiving you, but if you do not bring that external experience inside and embody it, you will not... Support this podcast

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Feb 12

1 hr 6 min

The Driver's Tipple (https://www.thedriverstipple.com/ (https://www.thedriverstipple.com/)), on the surface, is a gin replacement product without the alcohol. However, once you scratch the surface, there is a deep and profound tapestry of philosophy and ethos that emanates from the founder and owner; Hamish Gordon. Like many other successful brands, The Driver's Tipple comes off the back of the creator having a real problem. Hamish had quit alcohol, not on account of addiction, but because he didn't resonate with it anymore. His challenge was the dilemma of not drinking alcohol, but having a rich social life all around the veritable British institution that is the pub. I can attest to that, after a while, drinking tea, water and sugary drinks gets very boring, so faced with a problem, the solution was "easy" when the culprit was identified; alcohol. How do you get alcohol out of the Gin and Tonic? Along came "The Driver's Tipple"; a gin without alcohol. For Hamish personally there of course was a journey to socially thrive in that traditionally alcohol centric environment. For others who cannot visualise themselves in the persona that a transformed person has taken on, will often react negatively; they simply can't resonate. On these types of journeys people will challenge you, judge you and doubt you, it is par for the game. When we show up as role models and act with conviction, confidence and strong boundaries, we needn't convince others of our virtues, they bear witness to it and want to mimic it and will seek you out to learn from you. Your antagonists become your fiercest supporters.  The challenge to get your product, that is the antithesis of the pub culture in the eyes of the patrons and proprietors alike, in to the hands of the pub clientele. The attitude that people go to the pub to drink alcohol was Hamish's first challenge. Here's where the first level of education of the market place had to take place. Hamish is not the first pioneer to have to battle through this challenge, but every disruptor has to tackle it from a new perspective. The way Hamish overcame it was very pragmatic; challenging the idea that everybody in the pub drinks alcohol. There are those that are pregnant, designated drivers, non-drinker, etc. that are not being catered to and highlighting this to the business owners opened up a new opportunity to get patrons into their establishments as well as giving retail outlets a wider selection of products as well as a new cadre of clients. The pub owner could now also claim a moral high ground supporting healthy choices and to lessening the drunk driving curve. Competition in a virgin market is good, because the first step is to educate the consumer and create a demand. If you are a sole player in that space and there is no pre-existing demand you have to invest heavily in that process before you can even start to promote what makes your product special. Introduce several players and the burden is spread across several players and you each benefit from the others' efforts. For many the idea that others selling similar products to you are your collaborators and not competitors is difficult to overcome, but it is a necessity in this type of a market. I would argue that any company in any market can use this mindset as part of their success story, but that will have to be the topic for another time. If you've read my article "https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/upp-unique-passion-proposition/ (UPP - Unique Passion Proposition)", you will understand part of the recipe of the success of this product. Hamish did not create this product out a perspective of making big bucks, it was to solve a problem that he was passionate about. This approach permeates the whole project and energises it to a point where people want to be part of the journey and to support it. However, to use this approach you have to embody the ideals of passion; trust, faith, joy, optimism, etc. It comes from deep within,... Support this podcast

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Feb 5

1 hr 17 min

"Once you can accept the Universe as matter expanding into nothing, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy" Albert EinsteinWhen we perceive life as happening to us and viewing our experiences as extrinsic to our internal processes, we are challenged to accept life. Acceptance is not about giving up or accepting "your place".  It's about accepting that you are where you are and that you have a choice about where you are going. However, that choice might instead be about your attitude to your current situation. Acceptance is being ok what is and what has been, but striving for optimising one's own experiences.  Acceptance is a state of flow and grace. You embody a permission state that allows you accept the opportunities in life, whether they are to teach you a, at the time, harsh lesson or something fully in alignment with your path towards the optimal version of yourself. The universe is beautifully complex, and there is no way for our conscious minds to fathom it all. When we try to figure it out and force our will through we exert control, which works in opposition to acceptance. Imagine the river stopping because of some logs and rocks saying, " I am not flowing any further until I break through these obstacles". It doesn't do that, it flows with those obstacles accepting them as part of the river. When we are sleep walking through life we tend to involve ourselves in the paths of others either to rescue them or because they are doing something "to" us. The paths of others are outside the boundaries of our control and the best we can do is to accept the choice of others and know we can only control our thoughts, words and actions, and accept our responsibility for them.  This is a "permission" state of mind where you allow yourself to flow through life, with all its ups and downs, knowing that you have your grand purpose and all your experiences bring your closer to it. When we accept we are in a receiving state as opposed to when we try to control everything or trying to retrieve our dues.  When we shift focus inwards and understand what is in our purview of control, what is our path, purpose and mission, understand our own super powers, understanding where we come from and allowing ourselves to feel; we will start to accept. When we understand our position in cosmos, we accept our role as the drop in the sea, without every one of us it would not be a sea.  Acceptance is a paradox; when you accept life for what it is and bring in how you want to feel in life, there will be less for you to simply accept and more to enjoy.  Support this podcast

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Jan 29

1 hr 5 min

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." Dalai Lama XIV, The Art of Happiness We may have moments where we are acting out of compassion, but that does not make us compassionate by definition. To be compassionate one has to embody it and allow it to permeate one's existence. Compassion is unconditional and an absolute state of being. Embodying it means that one does not make any exceptions in where we direct your compassion; it is an absolute state of being. On my journey I have come to use compassion as an antidote to judgment; ask questions to connect with another person as opposed to making statements and assumptions. For us individually, compassion brings peace, acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude. Compassion is also the first pillar in "https://www.thealchemyexperience.co.uk/coaching/ (The Alchemy Experience)" coaching ethos. The video below is an example of a person who embodies compassion and to him there was no other option than to forgive his son's killer.  https://youtu.be/ZOjVSWb4MU4 (https://youtu.be/ZOjVSWb4MU4) We direct our practice towards ourselves, others and experiences we have. It is a daily practice we undertake, one stop at the time, until we embody it and our first reaction is compassion, it's no longer an afterthought. It is not the façade or the mask of a person, i.e. the person being projected into our physical existence, that we show compassion for, we direct it towards the essence of that being, the purity that existed when that person was born. It still exists inside everyone of us. The layers on top are the hurts and the trauma we have experienced. The technique of compassionate questioning that I use is to ask questions as to what has lead a person to act, think or speak the way they do, e.g. "I wonder what trauma he has experienced in his life that makes him feel justified to yell at me?". Compassionate questioning allows me to observe my own reaction to the experience and observe the other person from a higher perspective without being reactionary. It also allows me to connect with that person on a very deep level, beyond the external projection. We are retraining our cellular and subconscious memories to bring back our own pure essence and to peel off those layers of our own conditioning and programming.  Another essential tool I have found in my own practice is to meditate on compassion. Compassion, or Karuna, is one of the first and main practices of Buddhism. They will use the "Om Mani Padme Hum" (The jewel is in the Lotus) mantra to focus their compassion during meditation. Because one of the first places you start practicing compassion is towards yourself, sitting in meditation with the focus on compassion is extremely helpful to start this journey.  Compassion is not a sign of weakness, on the contrary, when we embody it we are fully aligned with our boundaries and dare to show up in our own vulnerabilities. Showing compassion does not mean that we need to accept the behaviours of others and let them steam roll us, it simply means we have an understanding of the suffering of others and accept their paths as their own and that we do not need to engage ourselves with theirs. We find that shame, guilt, anger, bitterness, fear, etc. stand in our way to become compassionate and it is a challenge to work yourself through those layers. However, once we show compassion towards ourselves we are able to accept who we are and how we have arrived to where we are at and thus are able to forgive ourselves. This is how we overcome those obstacles. It is a choice and with that choice comes accountability and responsibility for our thoughts, words and actions.  As we progress, we can test ourselves. Try showing compassion towards someone that have done some horrible things, e.g. Hitler, Pol Pot, Ted Bundy, etc. We do not need to show compassion for the atrocities they committed, but to the inner child and... Support this podcast

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Jan 22

58 min 32 sec

Jason Holzer, The Author Of His Brilliant Book "Shattered By Suicide, Renewed By Resilience", lost his father when he was 17 years old. The first half of the book will grip you and have you bawling your eyes out. Here Jason shares the aftermath, seen through the eyes of his 17 year old self, of his father's demise, by suicide. It is raw and authentic. Jason shows up with vulnerability that pulls you in to his plight and allows you to fully hold space and empathise with him. Bring your box of tissues. Link to the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07Y5Y5H3V (https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B07Y5Y5H3V) The second half is a courageous story of a "comeback kid" and how Jason, through his support network and his own resilience works his way through his pain, anger and confusion. It give you hope and faith in that even in the darkest of hours, we can find hope. The feeling reminded me of the feeling I had when I read Viktor Frankl's "Man's Search for Meaning". It is an uplifting feeling of hope that fills your chest and manifests in tears of joy.  Jason shares his recipe for overcoming tragedies in life and they are all shared and described from a very grounded perspective; easy to understand and with easy access for anyone at any level of their own self development.  In our discussion we go through some lessons that aren't included in the book and how we are constantly evolving into new and more optimal versions of ourselves. We also dive into Jason's passion of working through sports coaching (https://4dathletes.com/ (4D Athletes)) to help kids and parents alike to work on their mental health through lessons that sport brings them. This is a powerful discussion about suicide prevention that is raw and vulnerable; what can you do to start discussions with your friends and family? Sign up to receive Podcast related news: [aweber listid="5864433" formid="954159606" formtype="webform"] Suggested meditation: [products] Support this podcast

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Jan 15

54 min 9 sec

"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve, the fear of failure." I put fear into two categories; existential and notional fear. Existential fear is fear of an experience that has death as a direct result, and notional fear is fear of an experience that has an outcome that could result in death with a one or several sequential experiences after it. Fear of poisonous or other animals that can kill us would be classified as existential fear, if there is a reasonable probability that you would encounter such an animal in your daily life. Notional fears are those where you make assumptions about the outcome, e.g. if I lose my job, I will have no money, if I have no money I can't eat, and if I can't eat I die.  Fact is, that we are not born with fear in our system, it is something we learn (https://www.nsf.gov/discoveries/disc_summ.jsp?cntn_id=135498 (study on how babies develop fear)). We have primitive reflexes in our nervous system that allow us to react with rudimentary physical movements to assist our survival as infants. We also develop an instinctual habit of observing occurrences in our external immediate environment that could be a threat to us. Of course as we develop a sense of self in our adolescence, we apply many of the "lessons" from earlier in life and apply that to our idea of self in our environment; the idea being that the lessons are there to protect our "self" in our perceived reality.  Very rarely does anybody develop a fully congruent and healthy idea of self in relation to their organismic self, as described by Carl Rogers. It is always tainted in one way or another by the "lessons" we absorbed as children. Because, traditionally, parents treat and raise children as if they are smaller versions of themselves and don't grasp and apply the fact that children are unique, that do not conform in their infantile brain and neurological development to the expectations of adults, children end up with the "wrong idea". They take on beliefs that aren't in alignment with what the parent is trying to convey or are taken out of context. Sometimes, the parent will convey an un-truth out of frustration that sticks in the young mind, e.g. "No, you can't have that. We can't afford it, we are poor. You can't just have anything you point at". Out of all these experiences will emerge a person's notional fears.   Our notional fears, therefore, evolve out of our environment(s), and because we view our present and future experiences through the lens of our past experiences, we perpetuate those fears through out our lives, until we deal with them. Examples of those environments are; family, religion, community, culture, national identity, etc.   Fear is not something we can control, however, our reaction to the fear and how we express it comes from our perception of it, i.e. our thoughts. Our thoughts we can control. Having a healthy relationship with your fears is central to your wellbeing. Extreme cases of this would be front line military personnel, race drivers, base jumpers or any other extreme sport. These cases will balance their fear on the outer edge of their capability and that control often times make them feel more alive. This type of fear can become addictive. For those of us who prefer the more calm and serene existence, it is a comfort to know that we can control our fears through our thoughts.  On the flipside there are cases when people express that their fear of death is no longer present within them. These cases would include those that have experienced an identity altering experience, such as divorce, near death experience, spiritual awakening, etc. Also, some that come out of horrendous experiences, such as war, crimes against humanity, severe personal violations, etc. that have gained a growth mindset from their experience. Essentially, people who have hit rock bottom sometimes describe this state of mind. This does not... Support this podcast

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Jan 8

1 hr 6 min

"Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don't" (Steve Maraboli, "Life, the Truth of Being Free") We meander through life with an idea that we can control the outcomes of our experiences. Sometimes, things work out more or less the way we intended, but most of the time they don't or we have an adverse side effect because of our need to control the outcome. One day you wake up and you realise that having control over anything outside of yourself is a fallacy, an illusion, created by society. As a matter of fact you realise you only control three things: Your thoughts Your words Your actions At first it comes as a shock to your system, right? "I have no control over what happens to me?". Well that is not entirely true, but trying to control your external environment is not how you do it. After a while you come to understand that you were just frigging liberated, you were set free from expectations that were unrealistic to begin with; the expectations that you have to be in full control of everything around you. Your perception of your present and future experiences are viewed through a filter of you past experiences. You programming have left you to believe what you believe about control. Meanwhile, you don't control what you actually control; your thoughts, your words and your actions. You've been a passenger up until this point, but now with your new realisation you are becoming the observer and the co-pilot. You reframe your past experiences with by thinking differently about them, causing you to act and speak differently in the present and future experiences. You are now the co-pilot and co-creator of your experiences, because your reality is your perception and you control that. You are the co-creator because there is always the universe that has its say as well, because you are not a singular entity in this world, you are part of a collective energy. So, whatever you are and express into the world comes back to you, it's a feedback loop; think, speak and act with compassion, gratitude and forgiveness, that is what you get back. With that in mind, would you not mind your own energy and feed your absolute best Buddha nature into the world? Time to apply the "Is it true, helpful and kind" filter to the words coming out of your mouth. You know what you can control and you are feeding your best version into the collective consciousness, you are now in flow as you become aligned with your higher purpose. You are getting in touch with your authentic self. You act in unison with your intuition. You can't control your emotions, but you are ok with that, because you know your emotions are experiences and communications from your body. They may hurt, but you know trying to control them will hurt even worse, so you permit the emotions to rise within you and you walk right on through them receiving their messages loud and clear. You are living consciously present where money and material thing become tools for you to pursue your higher purpose, you true measure of success is how you feel. All of this coming out of knowing what you can and what you can't control. Enjoy your newfound control. Sign up to receive Podcast related news: [aweber listid="5864433" formid="954159606" formtype="webform"] Suggested meditation: [products ids="2556"] Support this podcast

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Jan 1

1 hr 11 min

On my journey and in my practice, I have discovered many superpowers. Some fantastical and others seemingly quite mundane. One of these superpowers is "choice". You have free will and choice. You can choose to believe what you have been told about life and the universe or you can start asking yourself questions. Now, be careful, because once you start asking questions you cannot "unknow" the answers. Also, once you realise you have a choice in life you have to recognise you part in all the experiences you've had and hold yourself compassionately accountable for all the choices you've made and will ever make in your life. I hold myself accountable for my choices every moment of every day. I question everything and am grateful for the answers I get, however ambiguous they may be because I know in time I will have the full picture. I spent some 25 years in various entrepreneurial positions connecting and interacting with stakeholders. In 2016 I started asking those fundamental questions and started realising my own role in my life, I turned my attention inwards. I started diving deeper into the human experience, establishing a serious daily meditation practice and devouring books and educational material on philosophy and the human condition. I was seeking answers and exploring my own role in the greater picture. Inevitable, when doing this, one evolves spiritually and after 2 years of intensive "training" I was deep into it. However, there were pieces missing. I knew a lot, but it was still only in my conscious mind, I hadn't incorporated it, I hadn't grown personally. The revelation at that time was that each and everyone of us have two paths in life, we evolve spiritually, whatever that means to the individual, and we mature as people. This lead me to a eureka moment in understanding the meaning of life, or one of them anyway; we are to bring the pure essence of ourselves into physical manifestation. The pure essence being what it means to you; your soul, higher self, Christ consciousness, Buddha nature, or simply the new born purity that you once had. Spirituality (as I define it) is worth nothing if I don't embody the purity of my soul essence, then I am bypassing life through spirituality. Once I bring my soul into alignment with my physical experience, I have completed the mission for my personal growth and evolution and can now go out in the world as a role model as to what is possible. Those that are then ready to make that same journey will, others won't and that is fine. My coaching practice is based on the premise of "pursuing one's passion". In these workshops I've comet to realise that when we try to find the needle in the haystack, the haystack being all the elements of all your experiences in life, there is no point in picking through each straw to determine if it is a needle or lesson to bring forward in life. My practice has been to not try and solve the chaos and determine the purpose of chaos, but to boil everything down to their bare essentials and evaluate the experience from some simple tenants; compassion, acceptance, forgiveness and gratitude. I basically burned down my stack of hay and was left with all the needles that I could just scoop up and move on, leaving the ashes behind. Life in it self is simple; at some point consciousness enters, or is formed in, the collection of cells that is to become the human in the mother's tummy. Everything beyond that, until the time that consciousness departs the physical body, time of death, is a linked sequence of experiences. Even your "birth" is an experience, not the actual time of your coming to life. Our life is very much a collection of choices, choices as to how we perceive our experiences. For any past, present or future experiences you may change your mind on how your perceive those experiences, i.e. you can time travel to change your life. How is that for a superpower? It is your choice though. The Alchemy Experience Podcast show will be... Support this podcast

E

Jan 1

21 min 30 sec