Who the hell gets married over Facetime? After only dating for 3 weeks? Well, let us tell you. It's the end of the world as we know it, and we feel like it's a good time to cleanse our souls. We discuss rising tensions with North Korea and take a BUNCH of your pre-apocalypse confessions. Say it with me now: FREE SPEECH DOES NOT = CONSEQUENCE-FREE SPEECH. FREE SPEECH DOES NOT = CONSEQUENCE-FREE SPEECH. Hawaii becomes the first state to ban texting while... crossing the street? What the fuck kind of micromanaging shit is this? Thanks Obama. Trump TV: The next spiraling slope down our descent into fascism. Listener feedback reveals Andrew is not above slutting up our listeners. And in this week's After Dark: Get up close and personal in our private lives, including a new (and relatively major) relationship development. Pro-tips: do things apart sometimes. Have hobbies and a life outside your partner. Always flush the toilet.