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Jessa Zimmerman - sex, shame and sexual games

By Naomi Mellor

By the time I was in my early twenties, Carrie Bradshaw and the women in Sex and the City seemed to have revolutionised the way sex was discussed amongst groups of girl friends - my peer group certainly had a lot of very open discussions, and suffice to say that there was a time when I had a pretty in depth knowledge about the sex lives of my closest friends. I was reflecting on this since speaking to today’s guest however, and realised that those conversations are rare now that we're ten years older, and mostly married or in settled relationships. A lot of my friends have small kids and busy jobs, and the heady days of dating, sex and excitement seem to have disappeared somewhat. That doesn’t mean that we’re not happy, it’s just that our conversations have changed. A few friends have mentioned a lack of sex post-children, but what happens when intimacy and sex in a relationship starts to disappear altogether? Whatever your orientation or preferences, is it necessary to be having sex or being intimate in a couple to be happy? And how do you come back from a place where passion seems to have disappeared altogether? My guest today, Jessa Zimmerman, answers these questions and a whole lot more in her clinical practice as a certified sex therapist in Seattle, Washington. In addition to seeing couples for treatment, she has also written a book, Sex Without Stress, and produces her own podcast, Better Sex. If we’re talking unusual careers, this one certainly ticks that box, and I was so interested to hear from Jessa about what her job entails and her thoughts on sex in the 21st century. It goes without saying that this episode contains a fair amount of sexual content and some pretty frank discussions on a variety of aspects of sex, but Jessa is an amazing guest so sit down and have a listen! Show links: Website: www.jessazimmerman.com Podcast: https://bettersexpodcast.com  Twitter: https://twitter.com/JessaZimmerman Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jessakzimmerman/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/seattlecouplescounselor  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessazimmerman/   

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