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Social Media (How Real We Are There?)

By Ani Alexander

  What if you decide to be "authentic" and share absolutely everything? Let's be honest - we have all been there to some extent. We all do distort and even if not that, then at least filter, exaggerate and/or change the reality while posting on social media. Because let's be real - no one want to share the not so pretty part of our lives. And even if some of us are really brave enough to do it, then what is left for the people that we are really close to in real life? I mean, if I completely open up to all my 2,6k Facebook friends and over 10k podcast listeners, then how will my closest friends feel that there are not in the same group with the other 12,6k people I have not even met in person, right?  Or looking at it from the others side - who said that all those people on social media care about my personal life, what I ate for breakfast and how exactly do I feel about politics, religion and certain people. Probably no one needs to know about the exact airport, destination and flight delays when I'm traveling (and those who feel like they wanna know seem a bit creepy to me). People create their alternative life reality for branding purposes?  I know many people who keep giving out the worst advice ever. They do that way and want us to follow the same path. And the advice is:  Fake it till you make it! And that's exactly what many do on social media. They fake things. Those who don't completely fake their life, show it from the most attractive angle. They select the things to share and those things usually will leave the wrong impression.  Like someone having a photo of himself with a Ferrari on the background... Like someone celebrating their clients...  The thing is - probably the car is not his and the clients are non existant. Many inflate their success and completely hide their failures. And somehow, a s a result you end up with a newsfeed of happy couples, successful entrepreneurs, exciting life events, etc. Why do people do that? Well... maybe they lack self-confidence and need re-assurance in form of likes, follows, encouraging comments, etc? Or maybe they are trying to convince themselves that they are important, inspiring, motivational... I mean some truly believe that by creating their online image they do help others feel better... But in reality... Many of us look at our feeds and start comparing our lives to it. We look at our toast with Nutella and compare it with the Instagram photo from a fancy restaurant. We look at our messy desk and compare it to someone's amazing co-working space photo. We are coping with a heartbreak and looking at happy couple's romantic photos. We struggle to get our first client and watch how someone bragging about how many new clients did he get that week... And as a result we feel depressed and think that we failed.  But guess what? We DIDN'T  The more time I spent on social media, the more I felt into that trap...  But I stopped comparing myself to others. I stopped caring much about how "more successful" they all are. I stopped caring if I get into the top lists at all (top 100 social media influencers, top 100 blah blah gurus, etc...). I stopped feeling obliged "being authentic", "sharing and creating my life story" and "providing value" to my social media followers.  I stopped caring about "what's the best time to post"... I gave myself permission to be free. Freedom to be myself. Freedom to create content only when I've got something to share. Freedom to keep the things I think are private, private. The freedom of voicing unpopular opinions. 

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