ethnically diverse. My grandmother was native to Algeria, my grandfather
former Yugoslavia. My mother was born in France, my father Canadian. I
didn’t quite know where I belonged.
My father had this old Hewlett Packard computer with this bootleg copy of
fruity loops, I’d spend hours making beats. I couldn’t stop creating. I didn’t
start singing until after my mother's death, it was the only way I could unpack
my emotions. I became colder than the winter that she left. I fell in a
downward spiral and would eventually have to face the depression that
swelled inside. I tried everything I could to numb myself to the pain but it only
made it worse.
I began filtering my struggle into music, I felt repaired analyzing the things
that tore me up. I began constructing a world that I could find solace in. The
first song I had ever finished was BADCHILD. I had written and produced it in
3 days and thrown it online. I moved to Toronto not knowing anyone, just on a
gut instinct. I lived out of an old rehearsal space with a hot plate and an air
mattress, and when the air mattress burst I slept on the floor. BADCHILD took on a different
meaning to me. It was about finding redemption in my failures. BADCHILD is
about not being good enough, not living up to expectations, it’s about trying
to be a better person.